+ 19 How to run a cycle in the Joint (Volume I)
As some of you may have noticed, I’ve been gone for a while. Where have I been? Shamefully, I’ve been doing hard time in the county jail. That’s right 30 days to life for a crime I didn’t commit. Ok, maybe I did it, maybe I didn’t, and it was really only 30 days not “to life”. Thought it sounded badass, and I’m pretty badass so I used it.
So I get arrested. You all know the routine. I make bail and have a court date set. After talking to my lawyer, I knew that I would do anywhere from 30 to 90 days.
Why were you arrested Ed? That’s none of your damn business, lets just say it involved Datelines Chris Hansen.
So I ran into a problem. I started my cycle two weeks prior to the arrest. I wanted to go to jail as a badass, but didn’t want to crash mid-term, so I devised a plan to smuggle gear into the big house.
Holy shit Ed, how did you do that? Listen closely kids and I’ll explain.
First, I knew that there really is only one way to smuggle gear into jail. I wasn’t too keen on the idea of rectal smugulation, but knew that was the only way. So I decided on Shorty’s as my gear of choice. (Thanks Goth) I figured that shorty vials would be less painful and be less apt to get stuck. So I popped the tops, tied them off in baloons and got to “packing” for the trip.(No Homo) I stopped eating 1 day prior and drank a shitload of Fleets phosphosoda to ensure that my insides were cleaned out prior to packing my bags (if you know what I mean.) I’m not going to lie, packing the bags sucked ass, but after each vial I made it a point to yell out “No HOMO!” just to make sure that it didn’t count. I was able to stash 2 shorties of Test E, and two of Tren E. Yes kids… I put two bottles of tren in my ass, no homo.
This was 30 minutes prior to the court time.
So, Court came, I plead guilty, and got 30 days, BFD. …Process me so I can get this shit out of my colon.
I get booked and for what seemed like 20 hours, I finally get placed into my cell and shit out my gear, which surprisingly went quite smoothly.
After some serious scrubbing, I sat in my cell with 4 bottles of gear. Holy shit.
So Ed, how the hell did you inject that shit? Well kids, that’s where the magic of the mind comes in.
Before court, I thought and thought about this until I came up with a solution. A standard BIC pen. WTF ED! A bic pen???
Yes kids a Bic Pen.
In this particular county jail, we were allowed to have standard Bic pens. At the commissary, I purchased 3 bic pens and a safety razor. Once back to my cell, removed the ink tube, blew (no homo) the ink into the toilet and hollowed it out. Then I used all available cleaning material to purify my vials, my ink tube and the main pen tube and two erasers from my cell mates pencils. I removed a thin razor from the safety razor and cut the end of the ink tube at a 65 degree angle. This would be my pin. Holy shit ed that’s like a 2 gauge! That’s right kids. No pain no gain.
I then took one eraser and jammed it in to the end of the main bic tube and then cut a tiny hole in the end of it and jammed the newly fashioned plastic bic pin into it. Then I took the other eraser and fashioned a plunger that fit securely inside the pen tube. This would be pushed down by the other half of the ink tube.
Before pinning, I cleaned everything with cleaning supplies, and then soaked everything, vials included in vinegar for 48 hours. Holy shit ed YOU ARE DOING IT!! Yes. I am kids. Yes I am.
Pin day came. I popped the top off my two of my shorty’s and filled the pen tube with half tren, half test, held on to the base of my homemade pin and jammed that bastard into my ass.
Did it pin Ed?
You bet your ass it did.
Did you have pip Ed?
You bet your ass I did.
Did you cycle the entire 30 days?
You bet your ass I did.
Did you run that place?
You bet your ass I did.
Please kids, do not try this at home.
Ell my love, no homo
Ed.
Disclaimer: Ed is not responsible for your asshole ripping open from jamming any sort of gear in your rectum. Furthermore, Ed is not responsible if your ass falls off from jamming a bic pen into it because you are a dumbass.
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 01: Mexicana Boogaloo
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 02: La Mesa
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 03: Mi Casa
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 04: Trial
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 05: Arraigo order
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 06: The cycle
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 07: El tercer piso
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 08: The hole game
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 09: The Sancho
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 10: Papa
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 11: The old man cometh
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 12: The Ritual
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 13: Achilles
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 14: Sympathy
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 15: La mano de dios
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 16: Brothers
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 17: Jesus Saves
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I think he took this post a little too seriously.. lol
next time nebido
ClassyChassisHa ha, the juices were flowing here.
they toss you in a central amer slammer and you survived it? strong work bro
Great read. Almost believable ED but they check bholes when you are sentenced and would have confiscated your smugulation- though I love the new term.
Not in Honduras.
ED in for only 30 days and you took Test E....C'mon pro like you knows you should of snuck in some TNE or TProp Test E far to long of an ester. Haaa. That was funny as shit all in fun good laugh...remnded me of http://youtu.be/5hfYJsQAhl0
When you are pinning with a bic pen bro--frequent pinning is not very friendly.
tou-che'....
U know why I love this fucking post? Because I just wrapped up up a 5 to 7 year state sentence in Massachusetts back in September. I had my girl bringing me 50mg dbol pills 25 at a time on visits. I was the only 220 lb. kid benching in the 400 club, it was great!!!I've actually SEEN dudes use this method to shoot dope and love you SIR ED for putting us juice heads on the map with those tried and true glutes of yours (no homo)Outstanding love for the sport and you're clearly as sick in the fuckin head as me. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!!! If I could plus one u I would brother...
Another masshole? lol I wrapped up a 5 year bid about 15 years ago. Went through Walpole for processing of course. What made it funny is I saw friends I haven't seen in years, that explained why. They were pinning back then and I was too scared of needles at the time. plus needles and prison for me was not a good idea with aids and all that shit.
noob941i +1d you both 76 mnths served in the 90z for trafficking
Thanks for the kind words.
That's a good woman to sneak dbol into the joint for you. :).
hahaha i had to read this again
My fave part was "but after each vial I made it a point to yell out “No HOMO!” just to make sure that it didn’t count"
Thanks for the laugh, i def needed it today
Yelling "no homo" is probably the single most important step the process.
lol i swear i needed this
This is the craziest shit I have read on this site. What you did is probably the sketchiest most idiotic thing I have ever herd of. It would have been easier to just get put on TRT and that way they would have to give you your meds and you wouldn't have to put gear in your ass or a bic pen for that matter.
Lol. That hurts bro. Of all the people who commented, you've gotta be the hater. I hope you feel good about yourself now. Thanks for hurting my feelings today.
No homo
Ed
Haha sorry had to do it. +1 for the dedication lol.
It's all good.
You don't have enough karma to give a +1.
haha it's the thought that counts right?
No. Your disrespectful words carried a lot more weight. I'll never forget them.
Especially the part when your 22 year old ass spoke to me as if you knew what the hell you were talking about.
Now run along.
You're absolutely right. I have no experience with putting gear up my ass. I don't know what I was thinking commenting on that topic.
lmfao! out loud!
You weren't thinking.
You just decided to be rude to me without reason..on a post that even a child with a 3rd grade education could see was written to be funny and for entertainment purposes.
That's what separated you from the rest of the herd..the inability to separate fact from fiction.
Nice job bro.
U mad?...
No bro. I'm not mad. I make it a point to neve get angry with children or the ignorant. Fortunately for you, you fall under both categories.
Says the man with a bic pen sticking out of his ass... You can fix ignorance but you can't fix stupid.
(Im just busting you balls bro, sometimes you have to go against popular opinion to get a rise out of people.)
-Cheers
beavisThat is the coolest thing I have ever heard.
Thanks bro. I think the critical component in this is making sure that you say no homo a bunch of times while you are stashing the gear.
its so make believe someone one will believe it! goodluck kids, no worries 4 shorties aint nothing try a whole can of Bugler smashed in plastic wrap, when you sit you do it real slow or get serious stomach pains. turn that can into about $500 in a couple weeks. add matches and rolling papers for extra $
Lol. Wish I would have consulted you first-- a can of Bugler.... Now that's packing the prison wallet like a boss.
I dont understand why you didn't take a shit load of cialis and put a slin pin in your dick hole.
That's a very good question, that I'll happily answer. I didn't need to take the Cialis. Slin pins are too small to wedge in my wiener hole. they just slide out as do all standard syringes.
Lmfao
Who negged this? That is asinine. +1 to balance it.
Damn, a -1 for Lmfao. That's a tough crowd. You should probably just go with the standard lol until people are ready for it.
I'm scared to comment... if LMFAO get's a neg I'm screwed...
I'm so tempted to neg your ass right now bro....
Chaz32621That's alot of gear up the ass man lol
Yes. It is. I used a whole bottle of astrolube.
Lmfao, u are a god damn genius. That was some funny shit. Much props for your determination. Crazy but a genius. Almost pissed myself at the disclaimer.
Thanks bro.
No homo.
RustyhookerI saw "cycle in the joint" and thought it was a new pinning technique for the main muscle. Guess I'll just blame the cold water.....
Don't blame the water. Blame Obama. He is the source of all problems.
Lol....I just got done serve n my time also. I shoulda packed my prison wallet w sum Shorty's. No homo.
Amen brother. No homo indeed.
But now you know, and knowing is half the battle.
See kids, this is the byproduct of a meth addled mind when the cable gets shut off... :-P
Lol. Excellent lesson for the kids.
You should be a fucking comedian ed! +1