I've been lurking on here, reading and learning for a while, made an account several months ago hoping to join in the conversation and just never got around to it.

I've been on a journey with all of this for almost 7 years. Started off as a raging fat ass back in 2019 was knocking on the door of 40 I weighed 265 pounds at 6 foot tall of total lard. I've been a diabetic for 20 years at this point blood sugar under control but still nowhere near healthy. I decided enough was enough. I hit the treadmill.

Over the next 24 months I dropped from 265 to 195. I was much smaller but still fat. No muscle not cut just skinny fat, or skinnier at the very least. I've never been a weight room guy. I've lifted off and on over the years but with little success. I made the decision that I wanted to get that ideal "man" physique. That V tapered back and torso, smaller waist and nice base. So I started hitting the weights.

When I did this I let my diet and cardio slack but I was making at least some mild progress with the weights, but started ballooning up again before I knew it I was 235 again, although a different 235 than before for sure but still not ideal. So I started digging into nutrition and workouts and talking with people I work with that had the physique I wanted and reading everything I could get my hands on and in 2023 I really started locking my diet in and my workout. I shaved down from 235 to 220 all while still building muscle just a natural cut nothing other than the TRT I had been on for 10 years. Which lead me here.

Back at the end of 2025 I started really looking into trying to accelerate my growth. At 45 now and already having moderately low Test it was hard but I was having success I just wanted to get a boost. After 6 years of grinding I thought maybe I might need it which lead me deeper here and really considering some gear.

Went down a months long rabbit hole of what to start with and where to go with it and in January of this year I settled on a small cycle of essentially double my TRT dose of test (from 200mg to 400) with 50mg of anavar split into 2 doses a day for 8 weeks. I felt fucking amazing for those 8 weeks. Better than I'd felt in 20 years and I started to see real results. Veins where I never had veins fat burning off visibly with my weight increasing which was insane to me. I went from 220 to 225 in 8 weeks and was much more visibly lean. Definitely nowhere where I wanted to be but I was definitely excited and already researching where to go from here. I knew I wanted to continue to recomp.

I took 12 weeks off from the Anavar and increased test and went back to TRT dosage while I waited for my next cycle. I had blood work ran prior to cycle and after through my doctor and had no measurable impact on my bloods from the Anavar other than low iron and my naturally low estrogen.

This lead me to what I consider my first mistake. My doctor has told me many times over the years that I'm a low aromatizer. My estrogen is always borderline low even on TRT and even after 8 weeks of double my test dose it was still low. I didn't take this into consideration when I selected my next cycle. I decided I wanted to do something slow so I went with 300mg of EQ with 300mg of test for 8 weeks finished out with 8 weeks of the anavar because I loved it so much.

I'm still on this cycle and my first 10 weeks went great. Diet locked in, workouts great, building muscle and cutting fat in a small calorie deficit of 2-300 calories a day. Nothing too harsh.

After 10 weeks I hit a wall. No energy, sex drive was non existent workouts went to shit, couldn't figure out what was going on. Talked to some friends at work they asked what I was taking I told them and immediately they said "you crashed your estrogen" being a low aromatizer and taking EQ was a bad combination for me with only 300mg of test. A guy I trusted told me to raise the test to 5-600 and it will help offset that. I know I should have probably gotten blood work but this guy has been on gear for 15 years and I trusted his judgement and did it. Within 3 days of that first pin I was back hammering. Felt just as good or better than before.

I'm on the home stretch if this cycle now only a couple weeks left. I've went from 225 to 213 with tons more definition and I'm finally starting to see a real physique! I'm already planning my next cycle after the beginning of the year.

Sorry for the novel guys. TLDR: I'm new, I'm here to learn.