posted Sun, 05/20/2012 - 18:16
228522
+ 11 THE RECOVERY LOUNGE!....N/A, A/A, C/A, or any other Anonymous drug program!
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Welcome to the recovery lounge, this is safe place where eroid members can talk about recovery, steroids and recovery, or any other topic! There seems to be many of us here on eroids, there will surely be different fellowships in here and they are all welcome! Other eroid brothers are welcome to come and join the lounge if they would like, its open to the public!
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8 months today since my last drink.
Had 7 years under my belt and the cunning, baffling, powerful disease overtook me for the last time. I spent my 8 month bday at a shelter serving food. This keeps me humble and reminds myself how easily I could be in the same situation as many others. Yes I may not have a program as solid as others but I'm happy where I am at.
one week away from 6 fuckin years clean.....ooooooohhhhhh yeah,sorry its a really big deal to me.i have shown kicking opiates on ur own with no help can be done.its all about WILLPOWER.the same willpower i have in the gym doing a max. rep,im not gonna let that shit fall on me,whatever it takes to get it done,dig deep and just do it.
No disrespect, but that statement stirred some shit up for me. I appreciate your personal experience, but was an active IV heroin user for about a decade and this disease has nothing to do with willpower or the desire to stay clean, at least it did not for me, and for millions of others. I'd say you are the vast minority when it comes to your experience getting clean without any outside assistance from either a rehab or a 12 step fellowship. Knowing what I know, I wouldn't recommend saying what you did in an open forum. I say that because you have the ability to influence an active addicts who will rationalize to themselves why they shouldn't seek treatment. When I was active, I would do whatever it took to avoid detox or rehab or any 12 step fellowship. If I had read your statement in my active addiction, I feel I was so influence-able through the mental hijacking of opiates that I would have stayed trying to do this myself, even though I had many unsuccessful attempts to stay clean myself. And like the books of all the 12 step fellowships have written (and I'm not a big book, or basic text quoter), I tried everything to get clean while avoiding treatment, ie. detoxing myself, methadone maintenance, suboxone/subutex, substitution, re-locating, burning all bridges in regards to connections, etc etc etc. But then again, that was just my experience. This disease was much stronger than I was, and I'm cool with admitting that. Maybe I'm writing this because I'm jealous of you? Maybe it's because I feel like I have to attend 12 step meetings for the rest of my life to maintain the state of well being that I now have after 3.5 years of recovery from a life of hell? Whatever the case, I'm not picking a fight. I respect your experience, I just didn't want to leave you comment at face value, without playing the devils advocate for the addict that still suffers and who may have come across that.
very good brother, I actually left this thread cause of so many posts that where talking about substituting and getting clean with out a program.
Don't leave bro, for me, it's really nice to see that it is possible to work a good program and still responsibly use a little bit of juice. I saw you on here, and thought, "hell yea, that's awesome that this guy is doing what I'm trying to do." I've been clean, like I said for a little over 3.5 years. No nothing! No substitutions as I've been there, and I have done that, and it hasn't worked for me. To be honest I do have mixed feelings about the use of steroids in recovery, and I do worry that they can or will bring me back out to using. But, that being said, I did a cycle in recovery, and I didn't use, and it didn't make me want to get high. Is it mood and mind altering? Yea. Are cigarettes or coffee/caffeine or prescription anti-depressants and all that crap mind and mood altering? For sure. Are hormones drugs? These are all questions and things that I think about and take into consideration. I feel great, and I like working out, and how it makes me feel. Drugs and alcohol (I say "and alcohol" to clarify myself, even though I am fully aware that alcohol is a drug, but I don't want to separate them in any way, as they are one and the same) make me depressed, anxious, suicidal, crazy, reckless, unhappy, hopeless, unenthusiastic about life, frustrated, pessimistic, etc etc, but roids don't make me like that. They make me a little more intense, a little irritable at times, and I can be on edge a little more, but it's a totally different thing in my eyes. There is no intoxication, and no euphoria to steroids. It's just good to see others that are working programs in a similar boat than I'm in. Thanks, that gives me hope that I'm not fucking up, as it's not worth risking all that I have got in my recovery
True dat - sometimes I think it takes more willpower to be a drunk, a junkie, whatever - than it does to be clean. Addicts are some of the strongest willed m'fers around ... That said, everyone's trip is different.
Alright so I figured I'd give you guys my two cents..all through highschool I loved smoking weed taking the occasional Xanax and oxycodone. In my sophomore year of college I had gotten arrested for selling drugs and chose to do a "drug court" program in order to get my charges dropped. This program consisted of an out patient Rehab, 3 AA meetings a week, calling a number everyday and if they decided it was ur day u would need to come in and give a random drug test within the hour. Now with that being said this was the worst two years of my life while at the same time being just what I needed to wake me up. I couldn't use for 2 years and felt great however I recently completed this program got my charges dropped and Immediatly picked up a blunt. I love smoking weed and tend to take a Xanax at night to go to bed (which is prescribed) however I still find myself wanting a little oxy on Sunday after a long week ok working out :/
that exact thinking has fucked me over and over again. once i realized doing a little oxy just on the weekend is when life straightened out. changing your mind is what it comes down to
hey bro just remember that sunday will turn into sun. tues.,then sun. tues sat.,its a vicious cycle and you can fall back in w/o even realizing it til its to last.bro ive been there.to many damn times,do urself a favor and just stay away from it.i only say this cause i do care,even though i dont know you.i do know the place it brings you.you been good for 2yrs. dont throw that out. my .02
i do smoke weed in the eveings,but am clean from the opiates,the pot helps me eat my ass off,and yes i eat healthy.but also calms me down,i think from being fucked up for so long i have a hard time just relaxing.that helps me.when i quit i tried to do the meeting thing,not for me.seeing new people there knowing their banged up,plus listening to people talk about it,just made me start craving it.so my method was to surround myself around people i knew that didnt use,and were completely against it.and its been 6 yrs now..almost 6yrs 10 more days,and its a big deal to me.nice to be alive again.
I know what you mean bro. all they talk about in NA is when they used to get high. I dont have an addictive personality. When I got hook on heroin it was more because I didnt want to withdrawal. I would say this in my meeting and they would all tell me im just in denial and that im just an addict and ill always be an addict. Fuck that man, how are you going to say that shit to me. I dont bash NA at all, if it works for you then great. It dont work for me. I dont even crave heroin at all. I just think about how horrible hurting and kicking was and it totally turns me off. I dont like drinking either. I drink maybe once or twice a year. I do like smoking bud though but I havent even done that in a long time. The high I get from working out is enough for me nowadays. I do a lot of surfing too, for me its the best natural high.
good job man..and i get the same high from my w/o.your body releases endorphin's from beating up the muscle.opiates convert into those same things so us as addicts that are clean,i believe we feel the slightest bit of it.and honestly after the gym i feel so relaxed,my now addiction is healthy eating and working out.
the other things in my life keep me clean as well my girl has a son,the dad is a deadbeat doesnt want anything to do with him.he looks up to me and honestly that makes me feel on top of the world.
good stuff brother thanks for sharing!
thanks man
AA guy here. 7 months clean this round, 7 years last time. I stick to weed and roids now :)Yep I don't mention that last part typically. I am a firm believer in legalization of MJ. Only close friends know the real whiteoak.
Weed is not clean bro
I mean, that's awesome it works for you, but I'm just saying...
seriously though lol
Weed did help me out a lot when I got off the dope. whenever I would get the cravings I would smoke a bowl or 2 of some good bud and I was g2g. Right now I choose to be completely clean but I will start blazing again soon.
weed is a mind altering drug bro, you cant be "clean" if your getting high! what does your sponsor say about it?
right on brother! A drug is a drug is a drug. But is a hormone a drug? That is the question I am here to learn about.... I understand they can be mood and mind altering, but so is caffeine, or nicotine, or gambling for example. Am I just rationalizing the use of steroids to myself? Or would you agree that AAS's don't influence the disease?
Whats your take on aas and sobriety ? My chick gives me a lot of shit about it ultimately I remind her who the boss is .
I always argue whats worse smoking cigarettes or steroids ? I dont understand the stupid stigma aas in sobriety when you see all these people in the program smoking cigs lol
I know this is a battle ill never win Espicially here..but from my days in AA, a drug is a drug is a drug, therefore technically juice (which should only be prescribed by a doctor) and also don't care what anyone says juice alters the mind...i go from a average joe not wanting to really hit the gym, to a fucking beast who just wants to eat and workout all the time..placebo effect? Maybe. Me not wanting to waste the hundreds on gear? Maybe tht to...but in my book steroids are mind altering drugs..they alter the mind for the better..oh and Arnold used to smoke weed after his workouts
wanting to go to the gym and being high arent even close to the same. But its all good bro, you dont got to go no where.
Like I said juice mind alters for the better drugs alter for the worse, but ppl still get addicted and a use steroids and it is a drug
it was dicussed at length at the beginning of this thread.
hormones can definitely alter the mind.
Oh roid noid will u be my sponsor....lol
Sure! Did you use everyday? good go to a meeting everyday! Get one number from every meeting and call that person that night, after that call me, in 30 days youll have 30 names and numbers and ill know your serious about your life. We do a step study every wed at my house, all my sponsees come will see you there! Find a service commitment and suit up and show up. And most importantly dont use ANYTHING that you can get high from! BOOM
I thought I was a little old school but you got me beat, But true enough thats what got me sober and keeps me uprite and taking norishment. You have to do the work and get a good foundation if your going to have a lasting recovery. Thats the way it was explained to me and thats what works for me today.
my fellowship is very solid, many many addicts that got long term recovery, RECOVERY! meaning they practice the 12 steps everyday, work on changing behaviors everyday. Take away ALL mind altering substances so you can get out of the diseased thinking and work on all the other areas of your life that addiction affects. Yeah bro I take my life serious, I take this disease serious, to many people relapsed and dead or in prison from it. I got homeboys doing life behind getting high, good ass motherfuckers that lost the ability to make choices and now live behind the consequences. Homegirls that turned tricks just to get high man, families that have lost their kids to the system cause they couldnt quit. Im sure you know man if you go to meetings then you know. I will say im lucky though cause many of the areas around me dont have the same kind of recovery my area does.
We are alot alike bro.Sept 25 was 8 yrs for me.I celebrate next thursday.My girl had 6 yrs and celebrated last thurs.Lost alot of friends and i pushed alot of peple away due to this disease.I built a foundation in na been through the 12 steps and did alot of service work.Treasure of my homegroup now.Loven life,paying bills,and grew up.Weed is a drug that changes how u think and feel.It has no place in recovery it will cut yuo off from the steps.
Its prebed usage for RLS. Yes most don't accept it and not saying it's what people should do. Its what I do. As for the other post congrats. Knowing your own limits is awesome. If weed made me think of drinking or using other products I wouldn't use it.
well this is a different story! you said you believe in the legalization of MJ, thats not even in the same ball park as having a illness that requires it.
I could have been clearer but no matter if legal big book thumpers wouldn't agree. If that's what it takes to keep em sober more power to em. Just not my thing. To answer yes my sponsor knows. I just did another 5th step with him. Im quiting alchohol and if mj becomes a prob then I know what works. Legalization medical it not I agree with. Ever heard of od'ing on weed? Anyway not trying to get in a flame war so bowing out this thread.
Good luck with that mj maintance(mean absolutley NO sarcasm, honestly) i wish i could i really do but i know that if i smoked id wanna take a zany, if i took i zany id be right back to the H. Honestly i dont miss any of it but the weed but i know I cant focks wit it
Fuck that i would be carpet surfen,haha.I dont miss none of that shit either.i gave up half my life to do it and wont give it anymore!
whats up guys,i was a pill fiend for 13yrs,been clean now almost 6yrs,i have 2 weeks to the day til i hit the 6yr mark.never tried h was scared i would fall in love.once i got clean i found working out gave me some relief.i kicked cold turkey,toughest thing i've ever been through.i know i will NEVER go through that shit again.now i am hooked on being in the best shape of my life.i think we all owe ourselves that.good to have this here on eroids.this place is great all the way around,my new home and i love it.
gd keep it up bro. Build your body not fuck it up ;)
thanks man,my approach is i fucked myself up for 13yrs,i owe a good 13yrs and then some to UNfuck it!!i feel better now then i ever have before.plan on keeping it that way.and its nice being a beast cos you bump into the people you got stuff from ever now and then.but they where warn when i quit if you show me stuff or talk about it,YOU WILL TAKE A FUCKIN NAP WHERE EVER YOU STAND.
Holy shit just found this and brought my love of eroids to a new level!!! I have been clean since 9/24/11 ill celebrate a year in 4 days
Congrats just had an 8 piece.Your a miracle keep coming back.
the first year can be real tough glad you stuck it out keep up the hard work
congrats bro! A year is a big thing, many people outside the addictions circle don't realize it...takes a strong will to do that! great job yo
g4u bro !
congrats!
JohnnyBlackIve been clean since 4/20/10 technically my last shot of black was on 4/19. Since than only drank on the rare occasion (champagne with the ex on her birthday). Been a opiate addict since 14, heroin addict since 16. First rehab at 13 for ecstasy and boost since my parents were worried. Dropped out of high school my LAST semester of senior year because my drug use got so bad. Been to a total of 5 rehabs and 2 detox facilities. The last time was the charm, i truly lost everyone and everything dear to me before getting clean. It was the most monumental decision I've ever made in my life. since than I've gained my friends, parents, and Ex's trust back, i obtained a good paying job, got my GED, and went to college. I couldn't be any happier with all the changes I've made in my life. Ive gone through ALOT of stages since 4/20/10 but held strong through all of it and here i am.
Ive been told YOUNG heroin addicts have less than a 1% chance of staying sober the rest of there life, I beat the odds everyday i wake up sober, i believe if i can beat that odd, i can achieve ANYTHING
keep it up!
I take that same attitude with me everyday brother! ive been through some shit in recovery and stayed clean.
I have been clean since may 20, 2011 My bottom was on that date i got in a bunch of shit and was arrest i spend three and a half months in jail they sentenced me to 1-2 years up state but then decided to give me a suspended state sentence and released me on a last chance program called drug court. At first it was the hardest thing i had ever done but now i realize it has changed my life for the better i would have never gotton to where i am now as a junkie and my entire outlook on life has changed for the better. So i have been on this program for a year and there talking about letting me off early sometime next month I am really happy about being completely free again.
Good job Bro. Every time you feel like using just think about the hell you went threw to kick dope. Works for me.