posted Sun, 05/20/2012 - 18:16
229032
+ 11 THE RECOVERY LOUNGE!....N/A, A/A, C/A, or any other Anonymous drug program!
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Welcome to the recovery lounge, this is safe place where eroid members can talk about recovery, steroids and recovery, or any other topic! There seems to be many of us here on eroids, there will surely be different fellowships in here and they are all welcome! Other eroid brothers are welcome to come and join the lounge if they would like, its open to the public!
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Keep it up bro!
I messed around and got another dui (5)...get n ready to go to the slammer n 23 days. I hope I can finally over come that addiction !!!
Just for today bro. We all start at our bottom.
Jails a great place to start working steps. Ive known plenty of people who wrote their fourth step on jailhouse toilet paper. Go to a meeting. man up as hard as it is, raise your hand, and say you have no idea how to stay sober and you need help. Youll have guys come up to you and youll be shown the path. Get a sponsor. Call that sponsor. Get a big book. Work through the book and the 12 steps with that sponsor.
Solid advice. One day at a time, that's what worked for me...
Thats great advice. Thx!
Excellent suggestions. It works if we work it. We are all in this together!
Yes they r. This is kinda like the family we never met ! Good people !!!
Yeah, I WILL overcome it this time !! I have had enough of that shit n my life. Im take n my life BACK ! Thx
ouch! id say you might have a problem! get a hold of some AA literature before and when you get in there!
clean of cocaine four years and counting. fucking awful drug.
congrats! Keep goin. I just passed 1 year off gambling, I also havent had a drop of booze for 4 months, not intentionally, just havent, never been much of a drinker really.
GearofWarHey Noid, is this the place to talk about Narcotics recovery too? If so, i can't believe I haven't browsed and posted here..
yeah bud thats what its for
Good shit
What a great find! I am a month away from being clean/sober in aa. Training has become a very integral part of mt recovery. Everything I do aas wise is done in moderation. As much as my disease wants me to go to extremes I won't. I want to stay healthy and continue to bask in the sunlight of the spirit.
Just the way you worded that first sentance reminds me of something we say in my area....and maybe yours
How much clean time you got?
Ill have a week in ten days
oh geez, duhh I forgot to add the 10 years to the sentence. Thanks for seeing that!
its all good brother.....keep up the good work
Thanks and you too!
Can I get my paper stamped? I'm new here so I guess I will sit in the back.
ahhhhhh welcome back from "the walking dead" sir !!!!
My hat goes off to everyone here for their erforts and successes in their recoveries. This is a great thread as just talking about these issues can be a very intimidating task.
I myself am an addict, I will be 1 year clean on March 1/2013. My addiction is not substance, but gambling.
Long story short, early 2012 I hit rock bottom, lost everything...... again. Every aspect of my life was going to complete sh!t and I just didn't care anymore. The thoughts that go through one's mind in situations like these are nothing short of terrifying. Now almost a year later, several GA meetings as well as 1 on 1 counselling and endless support from friends, family and an awsome gf, I have climbed my way out of the worst hole of my life.
Now I gambling isnt the most common addiction, and many people have voiced their opinion to me that it is not an addiction but I will say this.
I used to look at drug addicts and alcoholics as weak willed and lazy people that chose to be the way they were. I could not have been more wrong, the whole time I was judging them I was sufferring from the same problem.
All the best to everyone!
I have sit in on several of these meetings. the disease is the same. I often refer to gambling as part of the disease when sitting in N/A meetings.
im not really tryin to talk to my sponsor bout this or any other addicts in the prgrm in my area due to AAS ignorance and fear, but also because i dont want to give anyone reason for alarm. i have all my gear already for my next cycle chillin in a box in my closet, and just over the last few days ive been obsessing about just sayin fuck it and startng now, even though i just finished pct a fuckn week ago! somethng about feeling back to normal (morning wood, lustng after my wife and random girls, aggression back to where it was precylce, etc) has the addict inside of me queitly trying to convince me its all good, your using torem and DAA in pct next cycle, it'll bring you back plus you're running hcg throughout. i actually dreamt about it for what felt like the entire night last night which is why im posting this - not because i need to be talked out of it or anything like that, but because i figure this is the next best thing to sharing about it in a meeting. telling on myself has always been an effective means of sabatoging my addiction. anyways brothas, just wanted to get that off my shoulders and stay on point
Doing this will only make for a worse cycle. good thing come to those that wait. your not even recovered yet, even tho pct is done your body still has some leveling off to do with secreting its own hormones and such wait some more and get better results.....also you wont fuck you body to the point where you will regret it, may not happen this cycle or next but doing this will absolulty fuck up your body in the long run
Hey mate things get better, I’m 18 months into recover from a serious opiate and benzo addiction after some major surgeries. Things got worse after they replaced my knee but and I tried and failed a few times to get sober… it’s hard man but with some help from family and friends you will make it through it. I have been there man getting a script for but not wanting it ( just the junkie in me grabbing that piece of paper ) You just have to stay strong and make sure you have your mind sent on getting your self back, and trust me your old self is there its just hiding under a thick coat of bs you sold your self, just do it before that one last time turns into that one last time if you get my drift….
A little fyi I was up to 180mg ms contin ( morphine sulfate ) and 135mg of oxycodone ( 9/15mg ir pills) a day plus 4 or 5 1mg xanax a day. . . I was a wreck. Decided one day I needed to get healthy or I was gonna die in some shithole, that and I wanted to prove these doctors wrong that I wasn’t just some junkie that was never going to get back to my favorite sports and marticial arts. Long road isn’t over yet but it gets better, man funnel every thing into getting your self healthy. And best of wishes mate.
And seriously after a month or so being sober feels like a pretty killer buzz after you have been numb for so long. ^-^ again good luck brova,
bbondsThanks for sharing that bro, hope you know how much that helps alot of us, keep up the good work
And all the best brother.
Guys im struggling with xanax. Im prescribed 4mg for my general/social/panic disorder. 8mg felt better and Ive stayed there. Its affecting my concentration at work, my memory is terrible and before taking the drug, despite my anxiety i was on the ball. Words would roll off the tongue like i had the gift of the gab and I cant do that right now.
Im scared as hell i wont get the old me back....
I can handle panic and anxiety but getting off this stuff is hell.
Anyone beaten benzos, can you describe how you did it.
thanks everyone
Hey man I hear ya. I'm trying to get off suboxone and xan right now. All I know is, when I'm not on them my head is much clearer. I was able to get my most recent six months of refills in the first three months and at this point have been totally without for two months. Things were really tough for the first couple weeks, but I couldn't even find anything through my friends. I had no choice but to do without. It had been three full years since I had gone without benzos, and I had not realized how mushy my brain had become. But your clarity will come back, mine did. My big problem is when I go back to get my sub refilled I will get new xan refills. I'm not to the point where I can get off the subs yet. Hopefully I can suppress the addiction and just tell the doc I don't need the xan anymore.
On sub too bro. Shit saved my life. A t the point now im ready to start weining off. But littlee scary. Spent most of my life jynked out or in prison. First time ive been so well off since a child. About to b off proba tion am a kitchen manager. N u begin to feel like its the sub that makes u super man. Working sixty pkus hr weeks without missing a step. But uts becoming that time. Soon been on this shit long enough. Oh yehah I get kolonipin too but dont take. Not really a fan of it. Ill take if im going to b in q large mall or something
On sub too bro. Shit saved my life. A t the point now im ready to start weining off. But littlee scary. Spent most of my life jynked out or in prison. First time ive been so well off since a child. About to b off proba tion am a kitchen manager. N u begin to feel like its the sub that makes u super man. Working sixty pkus hr weeks without missing a step. But uts becoming that time. Soon been on this shit long enough. Oh yehah I get kolonipin too but dont take. Not really a fan of it. Ill take if im going to b in q large mall or something
ray3801You can do it brother, you're past the worst. No need to re-live it....just give me your docs # and ill sabotage the xanax refill for ya! I'm on subs myself and don't ever see myself putting them down.
wean yourself off man, just take a quarter bar less for a week, then take another quarter away the next week and so on. i used a ton of them, ativan, valium to come down from sticking my face in a pile of blow and i actually remained on them even after i stopped the blow. once you are free from them you will realize its the best sleep ever and you will wake up refreshed a clear headed
Cheers Mate, Ive got a mate who is a doctor and this was his advice today when I talked to him. Said cold turkey is potentially life threatening.
sounds good brotha! the time while you are decreasing your dose will allow you to better cope with your anxiety as well rather than having to deal with severe withdrawal with the anxiety on top of it, would be too much to take for me
Bro benzos were the hardest detox i had lasted 20 plus days....i thought i had the worst anxiety ever but once i got off and stayed clean i relized it wasnt that bad...the pill create most of the anxiety when u dont take um on time or enough thats why its best to get off them completly !!!! Thier are other NON NARCOTIC pills that work just as good. They key is to get to the root of the evil..why you are anxious idk if your an addict but the steps and the program helped alot with that and keep helping with it! Becaful bc i have had siezures multiple times when i was abusing them so ask your doc about other alternatives and see if he can get you on a taper that will get you off of them bc they are bad news!
Hope this helped
X2 it took me more than 4 months to start feeling a little more clear headed. Im 1 yr clean on the 13th and im on a NON-NARCOTIC anxiety med called buspar and it helps alot without the euphoric side effects, not to mention they are non addictive
Hey TP,
Mate Ive suffered anxiety and panic attacks since i was 13yo. Back then we didnt know what it was when I felt sick, had a pounding heart etc. I was walking around worried sick most of the time but the doctors didnt realise it was an anxiety disorder.
I ended up with cameras getting shoved down my throat and having my gut examined as they thought I had stomach issues. When all came back clear I was told it was growing pains and to move on... 2 years (now in my 30's) ago I saw my first psychologist and was diagnosed with panic, general and social anxiety disorder. He put me on xanax and pristique.
Before i knew the seriousness of it I tried giving up xanax cold turkey. Hardly left my room or ate due to the anxiety/depression. I was feeling suicidal at day 7 when I finally dropped a couple of bars.
Tapering its going to be, that i can handle.
20+ months completely clean/sober... oxy was my poison ! Life is 100% better when your in control
now thats what the fuck is up bro! its good to hear the completely part especially, so many guys i see talk about being clean just because they gave up their drug of choice but nothing else. ive been active as hell in NA for just about 3 years 8 months (clean date is june 15th 2009), and am not confused in that for me and anyone else like me, complete abstinence is the ONLY path to true happiness and freedom in life. gear has def been a slippery slope for me though to say the least, pinning had become a rush and now that im off i think about cutting time off down more and more. lots of ppl in the prgrm know i was cycling (tell one person and they tell 2 who in turn tell 2 more etc) and im sure consider it a relapse, but i dont agree with that obvi and feircely defend my clean time when its challenged (it started to piss me off ppl would speak on smthng they knew nothng about). anyways, keep it up bro and im happy as hell to have found this topic
breakingfaceNice to actually have cash to enjoy life too
yeah dude... saving lots of money. By me its a dollar a mg ! oxy WAS no cheap habbit
breakingfaceJust found this thread. Im about 4 years off opiates (oxy) and a year off of drinking.
My drug use and drinking stemmed from childhood trauma. I came from the perfect family, father successful business man and mother successful stay at home mom. My childhood was marked with unexplained sadness, anxiety, and rage. It was not until I was in college that my mind began revealing memories from my past. Ill spare everyone the details, but I spent 2 summer at an all boy sleep away camp, with adult"councilors" from all around the world. Feel free to use your imagination to imagine the worst possible predatory scenario and you'll understand.
The memories came back in waves and it wasn't long before I realized that painkillers were an effective way of suppressing them and/or protecting me from their full impact. My spare time was now spent obtaining or doing the drugs rather than dealing with my mental state.
The classic story of self destruction. Arrests, bizarre and embarrassing behavior, kicked out of school, family witnessing me high.
One day I applied for a job working with kids. It was a long shot, but I got it. In retrospect I believe it was divine intervention. The job became my reason to treat myself better. The smiles soon replaced my need for drugs. The long hours and responsibility for the kids left me no time to worry about my own pain. Eventually I was able to get an apt, stop drugs all together, get fit, rebuild my relationships, and more on to the next step in life. Drinking was never a huge issue for me, but quitting it was part of the new me.
Pubic Information, Hospitals and Institutions, and Area Service Elections today! Its gonna be a long day!
holy shit noid i had NO idea you were active like this in the program! damn dude, thats really cool man and i thought i was like, the only member on here that was not only a member, but a trusted servant to several meetings one position being the gsr and therefore attending area meetings monthly. i have a lot of questions regardng other members outlook towards you on what we do, can i pm you? i know you're busy as hell and a mod, just lemme know
yes you can PM me
LOL, sometimes all the ego's and personalities at area get to me. Being a GSR I've got to be present to represent the group, but it can be 4+ hours and that get's pretty tiring after my 9-5, workout routine!
my disease held me hostage 24-7-365 days a year if my active recovery holds me hostage for 6 hours 1 day out of every month its a fair trade...without service work none of us would have a meeting place to get recovery, I dont worry about ego's brother, check that bitch in at the door and do my part, lead by example. thank you for being of service!
ive been sober for 7 years now. really started focusing on my body (getting bigger/healthier) the past 3/4 years. i have yet to do a cycle (spent the last 4 months researching). ive talked with my sponcer about it and hes clueless. so maybe you can help me. are aas addicting? if i do a cycle is that a relapse? opiates and alcohol were my demonds. ive been freed from that life and i dont want to jeoperdise loosing what i have today. thanks bro.