This isn't really a bad date type of thing but its something that I honestly shudder at when I think about it. Back in the 80's (I'm 44) I had this very strong thought that women liked poetry and romance so spent many a day learning and memorizing Shakespeare's sonnets and Romeo and Juliet. I somehow believed at age 17 that a woman would swoon to the works of the literary giants and to "true romance". So, one day a girl who I barely knew asked if she could sign my year book. I was a bit taken aback but felt why not. Now in those days you could have hit me with a rock over my head and I wouldn't have known it. I had no ability to see when a girl "liked" me since in High School I weighed 103 pounds, had a neck the length of my arm, wore huge glasses and had my hair combed to the side. Yea yea yea, I was a geek. In any event, I noticed that she put her phone number in my year book and under it she wrote "Call me over the summer and we can hang out." I didn't think much about it but knew that this girl was a 7 out of a 10 and had a booty the size of a tanker truck (She wasn't fat but genetically had a huge ass). So I jumped on the idea and called her. I still wasn't sure if she "liked" me but in hind site, a woman, girl, won't give you her number or ask you to call her unless they like you.

So, I show up at her home, her parents aren't home and I sit nervously fidgeting in her living room. She then invites me to see her bedroom. I think "cool" but not thinking anything at all. She asks me to sit on her bed and I do so. Again, I'm oblivious to her advances.

So I sit there doing NOTHING. I then ask her if she's ready since I didn't want her to get in trouble if her parents got home. She looked a bit frustrated but it didn't register to me. So we leave to go to McDonalds to eat. As I approach her porch I decided that I'm going to "make the move." So as we get to her door she turns around, I look her in the eyes, reach down, grab her hand and KISS HER HAND. The look on her face is forever etched in my mind. The look of "what the fuck?" Needless to say she never answered my phone calls and I'm forever convinced women don't like romance. /cry.

Mine is probably the worst one ever!! I asked this girl out in college and we went out to a bar and got some drinks and wings. Typical date, she said, hey do you want to come back to my apartment for some drinks and to hang out and watch a movie, Im thinking, sure, now she was a solid 8 face 9 body. So we get back there and we are doing shots and drinking mixed drinks, its about 2AM. So we are both pretty shitty and we start making out and I start to bang her on the couch and her female roomate walks in and sees us. Next thing I know, I am getting sucked and f@cked by both of them for about 2 hours while they both were doing each other too. That date really sucked and I have been scared ever since!!! Bitches

Myspace/facebook is a trap lol

Maybe 7 years ago I was chatting with this girl on MySpace yea I fcking know lol. So I add her and she looked smoking hot, so we exchanged numbers she calls and talks about she pleasuring her self and wanted me there and now, I was like man low easy picking and she was Japanese but I was to tired to swing by.the next day I talked to my best friend she said don't do it she is kinda large
Me: wtf? Lies
Best friend: that's not her real picture.

Anyways we made a date at Denny's I kid you not I walked right pass her lol and turn running for the exit she screams woody it's me I rolled eyes and turned around like fck me lol. So we ate she then said she wanted me tonight I said I had std lol it worked.

Ms woody if your reading this your the love of my life lol

Worst date: Coming out of a ten year marriage I was unsure what to expect with the whole dating thing.. so I had become friends with a guy from church.. not just any guy the preachers son. He was nice and seemed like a gentlemen. So we meet for lunch.. at chillis, no biggie. I get there a little after him and walk to the table where he stands up to pull out the chair and he's two maybe three inches shorter than myself. SMH.. not good but she's nice. So we start talking and order a drink, it's looking up... Then he starts tells me all about his FB (F%&k Buddy) who just so happens to be coming by.. and will be joining us. She does.. very nice girl.. Next thing I know.. Guess who walks in. PASTOR! and his wife. They come over.. I'm thinking great.. I'm sitting here with a large drink, a fb and their son. I'm guessing they are just going to say HI.. NOPE! pull up a chair we are going to have lunch with you guys. WHAT!! (keep in mind this is the man that married me) It's odd, a little strange but I'm going to make the best of this... we start talking again about life, liberty and the pursuit of my pastors sex life. I want to crawl under the table.. out the door any where.. but I do not want to hear about how he is honoring god with having sex with his wife.. and that we as young people should keep in mind that sex for marriage is frowned upon in the church... (his fb is sitting right next to me) Two hours later.. I say my goodbyes, no little man no need to walk me out, I got this.... Skipped church for ummmm two years.. not really I just changed churches..

I have a tenancy to meet women who are in college studying psychology.. Anyway.. I get this girls number at a club, Not knowing that she is studying to be a psychologist. Found out when I picked her up, they watch EVERYTHING you do. I got really high before the date lol.. and i think she caught on hahah. I never saw her again.. although she did text me months later, I didn't reply. Still had fun.

Coke

hahaha when i was 18( ten years ago) i got this really preety girls phone number while waiting for a bus, we were texting for a couple of weeks, then i invited her around, we sat on the couch chatting and flirting etc, i chucked on a movie and about ten minutes in, she layed across me with her head on my lap.............this is when she got poked........lol game over!!! had a few awkward texts but never saw her again...embarrasing lol hahahaha

So what made this the worst first/last date experience? Because she had a bottom half of Oprah? Sounds like you need to take more test.

Took a first date to see Avatar in theaters....very long