BEGGARS AND PANHANDLERS
If you live in a large city, you no-doubt have seen people hanging around bus stops and businesses asking for money. There have always been beggars and panhandlers, and they have always known that if you can swallow a lot of pride (and a little cum), you can knock down an easy 70K per year----better than most college grads fresh out of school.
But lately, this trend has caught on in small towns as the eceonomy continues to collpase (and make no mistake, it is collapsing---resting solely on printed fiat currency). In my town, the beggars, finding that big city folks have awakened to their bullshit sob stories, have moved in and tapped into the gullible naievity of the liberal Christians, which we seem to be over-populated with. They stand at an intersection---usually one that intersects with a Wallmart (we all know how gullible you have to be to shop there), and hold signs that read "DISABLED VET...ANYTHING HELPS" or "SINGLE MOM....LOST EVERYTHING". Upon questioning, they never give you a solid story, and after a few hours in one spot, usually get into their BMW and drive off to another fishing hole.
So I've decided that if people are that stupid, then it would be interesting to see just how stupid they really are.......just how much bullshit will they swallow. So in order to find out, Grrl and I have decided to do some begging on our own this weekend.
My sign will read...."RECENTLY PAROLED SEXUAL PREDATOR.......ANYTHING HELPS"........and Grrrl's sign is going to read ......."LAID OFF PROSTITUTE.....LOST EVERYTHING, INCLUDING PIMP". I've already made arrangements to have my belongings shipped to Tread if I'm lynched, and my wife shipped to BFG----IF she has any ass left to ship after our day in the sun.
Seriously, if you're able to stand in the hot sun for hours, you can run the fry machine for a while and Micky Ds. There are plenty of social agencies, soup kitchens and single fat girls who will take you in. You don't need to rake in 300 a day from people who are probably worse off than you. Taking money from poor people puts you in the same League as a preacher, and that's saying something.
Anyway-----what are you seeing in your town? Have you noticed things getting worse, or is your city hall repaving the sidewallks in gold?
- Bookmark
- 0
- 0
They are still joltin!! I think we will be good for maayyynbeee another week. Hard to say..may need a reship!
Coolio... may have to get you and Andro to come help braid my butt hair.... these french braids can be tricky on a redneck ..... I do have Elmer's Glue..... and some duct tape
I'll bring the cake!!
You fellas called down the wrath and HPG brought da
BOOM
tread-mJust helps me out I have bushes to trim brother!
You never held snakes in a church?? What about a plane, snakes on a plane?? As for Treads Snake.. HPG gots that thang like a snake charmer doin a little dance!!
No. All we have at our Shabbats is a pentacle, and horned god... no snakes.
I feel like I'm missing out on something... I want to hold my snake in church too!
RustyhookerMy church...Father O'Feelemup has pet snake sessions.
tread-mYou should see her gurl, its almost like she's done it before but with smaller snakes. I think she worked at a petting zoo before so its been some work adapting her but its like anything she does, she works at it till its purrrrrrfect!
I can't believe you have forgotten the lessons she gave me for Aboddon.. I've seen that woman work.. She didn't work at a petting zoo it was an extensive study that she did over seas some years ago.. she told me all about it.. She's my mentor.. teaching me the ways of the HPG!!
tread-mDear she didn't study shit! They studied her!
I believe that.. she just stepped in dis bitch.. so the threads about to be jacked..
What the hell kind of person hasn't ever held a snake in church? Not someone that I want to be associated with, that's for sure.
tread-mWe have to take the high road here as BTY would wish....so....F those sonsabitchezzz they can burn in the pits of hell worthless pieces of shit bastards! Almost like scripture when he says it though. Has the gift I guess : /
Amen Brother Tread! The only way that condemnation could have been improved would have been if you threw in the N-word.
No snakes in church! WTF! That shit would never happen in Texas.
You need a little more huuuuuukkkkkkk after the words.... you know like you are trying to get out a logy huuuuukkkk! That's how those hell, fire and brimstone guys do it..
Don't forget you have to clench your ass sphincter to the point that your face becomes red like a tomato and steam comes out of your ears.
OMG! I did you are right... only because I've never used the word sphincter before in my life.. you just made my day... sphincter, sphincter, sphincter!!
tread-mWe can't say asshole muscles in this thread, we have a man of the cloth present you know? Sphincter it is!
We call that the "Jimmy Swaggart". FYI
Jesus Christ!
...You had me up until you said "labels are kind of silly."
Say that when you're trying to put on your socks and they aren't labeled to tell you which foot they belong on.
Ever try opening a cans of fruit without labels? I once wanted pineapple to mix with my cottage cheese and got apricot instead. yea, that's right, mystery fruit.
Laundry day; without labels sorting my underwear from my wifes is nearly impossible.
I can go on but you get the point.
All I'm saying is think before you write dumbass comments like that. It's the kind of thing that can hijack a thread.
RustyhookerYoked like an ox and deserves a Pro tag!
¤starting up the roid van¤ beechez and hoes all aboard!
Speaking of pro tags... Nitti promised it if I sent naked pics of my self. Wtf Nitti! Where is my pro tag?
RustyhookerSeriously! One good favor stands for another.
AnonRustyhookerThat dove looked tasty! I mean....it is lunch and all. Lol
I Thought that hooker looked tasty.
RustyhookerHottie is dessert! ;) lol
feed me
RustyhookerI finished fasted cardio and here's Nitti giving away meals on wings?! Had to settle for whole wheat enchiladas :(
Your last fuck looked like a white dove flying off into rose petals?? WOW I think you've been drinking goat milk Nitti!
How did you get Cards?? Ted Bundy?? The dude off married with children? Goth sales shoes and HBG acts like Peggy?? I have a feeling you are gonna get in trouble.. o.O
I got my card off of EBay.
Are you tryin to sell me a NO HOMO CARD?? Cause I got one of those off a chick in Alabama!
One either has a no homo card or they don't. There is no in between.
-His Holiness, the Dahli Llama
RustyhookerWhat about NHP card? No homo pro....right?! Right?!
That's in the works. I am under contract not to speak of it.
DAMN! I just pulled it out and it says "NO LESBO" on it.. I can't believe the chick at the Hardees would sell me a bunk NO HOMO card.. She even said I could use it at the Pride Convention for free admission.
Lesbo is good Homo is bad. /salivates
That is not what "SHE SAID"...........
Unless they are fat and look like Men...
-Bill Clinton
She wasn't FAT just BIG BONED!
That's ok then. As long as they are natural.
Lol, that's why I always tell my bros to check the watermark. This isn't the first time Hardee's has done this.
So what do I do now Ed? I'm walking around here with a bunk "NO HOMO" card in my back pocket.. No protection at all.. WTF!! I'm like a little lost homo wondering around in the wrong part of the gay bar... .. I need that card! Other wise I can't write anything on any of your thread cause it's all "NO HOMO" card encrypted.
Ok, normally I don't give out this kind of information, but I like you and want you to be able to read my encryptions.
You need to drive to the GNC at the West Ridge Mall TONIGHT. There will be a dude working there that goes by the name "Franklin Nitti" He will be the dude with a wooden eye and the Beverly Hills 90210 sideburns. Tell him that Ed sent you to pick up a number 1.3. He'll know what to do.
All my love, no homo
Ed
Ummmm This Franklin Nitti wouldn't also go by the name Nitti? Did he get the wooden eye from a boxing match payoff?? Cause that Nitti has a retraining order against me.... However, if I've got my Nittis confused by all means I'll be there but I need confirmation before hand.. I can't do time in the pin like you.. my butthole is not like yours it can't... well never mind you know..
Yeah, its the same Nitti. And no, he didn't get that boxing. He will tell you that he did, but I was there when it happened. He got it while doing a Richard Simmons workout video. We used to do those together to keep our edge. No homo.
As far as the restraining order...Who doesn't have one from Nitti? He slapped me with one the other day because I stole some of his Twinlab's Amino Fuel. Just go. Wear a wig. He cant see worth a shit in out of his good eye and he'll never know.
Finally. Don't doubt yourself. I never thought I could do hard time either until I did. It's liberating.
And Never underestimate the elasticity of your butthole. - Tread-M
Alright I'm gonna trust you, any man that's confident in his sour cream gun abilities has to know his shit. I knew about the RS workouts.. MrsNitti and I found those while cleaning out his underwear drawer.. I tried to keep one.. hints here the restraining order came from. I wrapped it in some gstrings I found I was sure they belonged the Mrs.. but to my surprise when the cops showed up they were his.. Maybe since he got one of them back still in tact he's not mad now. ED! WIG? Have you seen my hair?? It's freaking perfect I can't cover it up!! That's like me asking you to cover those sexy cheeks of yours with pants.. I can't do it! I'm gonna take him a Twinkie, New Richard Simmons Shorts and a new eye patch.. Maybe then we can patch things up...