+ 19 How to run a cycle in the Joint (Volume I)
As some of you may have noticed, I’ve been gone for a while. Where have I been? Shamefully, I’ve been doing hard time in the county jail. That’s right 30 days to life for a crime I didn’t commit. Ok, maybe I did it, maybe I didn’t, and it was really only 30 days not “to life”. Thought it sounded badass, and I’m pretty badass so I used it.
So I get arrested. You all know the routine. I make bail and have a court date set. After talking to my lawyer, I knew that I would do anywhere from 30 to 90 days.
Why were you arrested Ed? That’s none of your damn business, lets just say it involved Datelines Chris Hansen.
So I ran into a problem. I started my cycle two weeks prior to the arrest. I wanted to go to jail as a badass, but didn’t want to crash mid-term, so I devised a plan to smuggle gear into the big house.
Holy shit Ed, how did you do that? Listen closely kids and I’ll explain.
First, I knew that there really is only one way to smuggle gear into jail. I wasn’t too keen on the idea of rectal smugulation, but knew that was the only way. So I decided on Shorty’s as my gear of choice. (Thanks Goth) I figured that shorty vials would be less painful and be less apt to get stuck. So I popped the tops, tied them off in baloons and got to “packing” for the trip.(No Homo) I stopped eating 1 day prior and drank a shitload of Fleets phosphosoda to ensure that my insides were cleaned out prior to packing my bags (if you know what I mean.) I’m not going to lie, packing the bags sucked ass, but after each vial I made it a point to yell out “No HOMO!” just to make sure that it didn’t count. I was able to stash 2 shorties of Test E, and two of Tren E. Yes kids… I put two bottles of tren in my ass, no homo.
This was 30 minutes prior to the court time.
So, Court came, I plead guilty, and got 30 days, BFD. …Process me so I can get this shit out of my colon.
I get booked and for what seemed like 20 hours, I finally get placed into my cell and shit out my gear, which surprisingly went quite smoothly.
After some serious scrubbing, I sat in my cell with 4 bottles of gear. Holy shit.
So Ed, how the hell did you inject that shit? Well kids, that’s where the magic of the mind comes in.
Before court, I thought and thought about this until I came up with a solution. A standard BIC pen. WTF ED! A bic pen???
Yes kids a Bic Pen.
In this particular county jail, we were allowed to have standard Bic pens. At the commissary, I purchased 3 bic pens and a safety razor. Once back to my cell, removed the ink tube, blew (no homo) the ink into the toilet and hollowed it out. Then I used all available cleaning material to purify my vials, my ink tube and the main pen tube and two erasers from my cell mates pencils. I removed a thin razor from the safety razor and cut the end of the ink tube at a 65 degree angle. This would be my pin. Holy shit ed that’s like a 2 gauge! That’s right kids. No pain no gain.
I then took one eraser and jammed it in to the end of the main bic tube and then cut a tiny hole in the end of it and jammed the newly fashioned plastic bic pin into it. Then I took the other eraser and fashioned a plunger that fit securely inside the pen tube. This would be pushed down by the other half of the ink tube.
Before pinning, I cleaned everything with cleaning supplies, and then soaked everything, vials included in vinegar for 48 hours. Holy shit ed YOU ARE DOING IT!! Yes. I am kids. Yes I am.
Pin day came. I popped the top off my two of my shorty’s and filled the pen tube with half tren, half test, held on to the base of my homemade pin and jammed that bastard into my ass.
Did it pin Ed?
You bet your ass it did.
Did you have pip Ed?
You bet your ass I did.
Did you cycle the entire 30 days?
You bet your ass I did.
Did you run that place?
You bet your ass I did.
Please kids, do not try this at home.
Ell my love, no homo
Ed.
Disclaimer: Ed is not responsible for your asshole ripping open from jamming any sort of gear in your rectum. Furthermore, Ed is not responsible if your ass falls off from jamming a bic pen into it because you are a dumbass.
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 01: Mexicana Boogaloo
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 02: La Mesa
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 03: Mi Casa
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 04: Trial
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 05: Arraigo order
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 06: The cycle
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 07: El tercer piso
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 08: The hole game
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 09: The Sancho
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 10: Papa
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 11: The old man cometh
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 12: The Ritual
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 13: Achilles
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 14: Sympathy
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 15: La mano de dios
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 16: Brothers
- How to run a cycle in the joint Volume 2 chapter 17: Jesus Saves
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Thanks bro.
haha this is so strange, im gonna try and use a cola can to inject!
I loke the way you are thinking. You could take the aluminum sides and roll it tightly into a syringe. Seal it off with some superglue or even some bubble gum.
Evil or Good Genius, I don't know but a genius for sure!
Thanks bro. I would say good. If I were evil, I'd have to be a democrat.
Spoken like a true American
Lol
You're a sick puppy! This was good tho! I'm ctfu
AnonDid I every tell you that you are the most badass dude I have ever even heard of !
I mean holy bajeezus ED, talk about overcoming adversity . Im going to think twice the next time they fuck up my order at the BK and forget the extra cheese on my tripple whopper. Before I tell my self " life doesnt get any worse than that " and I contemplate eating a whopper without that extra cheese, Ima think of you and all that you have endured just to teach us along our journey to Jr B.A..
Yes, I believe that you have told me that I was a badass more than once.
I'm am cool with that bro.
You see people don't understand what I have gone through. I started out as poor white trash in the easy hills trailer park with nothing but a webcam and a pair of second hand man panties. Worked my ass and found myself moving up in the world to head sour cream gun operator at Taco Bell, moving over to the west hill trailer park (thanks for the couch Tread) back to Jail, and now back to the west hills trailer park rooming with a family of 15 Mexican illegal immigrants. Sure, I'm living big now but this lifestyle didnt come easy.
Damn dude, I love your posts. Sour cream gun operator at Taco Bell!!!! LMFAO! Man this is some great stuff. I'm a fan and ask permission to start the Engineereddisaster fan club. LOL.
You have my permission. However, you may be the only member. You might get a better following with an Ed's an Asshole club.
If that's true I think the "Eds an Asshole" shirts may be a real money maker for the fan club. It would sell much more than "Ed's a super cool dude."
This is true. I know Tread-M sells a shirt that says: "I wish my wiener was as big as Ed's" and it has made him a shit-ton of money.
LMFAO!
This is some hilarious story. Just been laughing at my phone like some nutter.
True dedication tho bro. Pinning with a bic, I had a jail tattoo done with a bic a needle from the sowing shop, and a moter from a walkman, it still needs filling in like ten year later.
Nothing beats a good Walkman tattoo. :).
You sir are dedicated.
+1 lmfao .
Thanks bro
this.is.wild.
You know i read somewhere on here from this guy that had like 10 karma points that semen has a lot of Test in it. So you know... you could have just sucked a ton of dicks in there and been fine. Which is WAY less gay than putting things in your ass. Next time right?
Uh yeah bro...justify it however you want..if it helps you sleep better at night.
BARF
quit lieing, nigga! you had them 30ml jugs taped together about 4 deep!
Ass! I told you that in confidence!
Lmao!
LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
rectal smugulation ed? cmon man, everyone thats done time knows its called filling your man purse, or prison wallet if you prefer
I was in pc with a few homos. They talk different there.
No homo.
oh trust me i know, those tuckers in there always end up in pc. peeps in population dont take kindly to wakin up to their celly wanting to play tummy sticks in the middle of the night, so they end up in pc that way they dont catch a homemade pin to the eyeball ya feel me?
if you dont trust your celly, dont sleep on your belly!
...never homo
Hahahahahahaha
biggerthanyouHahahaha this is great but in reality every one knows that u were in the clank being jerry Sandusky's "center"...........................too soon?...
I was a victim FOOL!
Victims don't do time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
biggerthanyouTrying to suppress the memories I see....embrace and face then maybe u can get back to enjoying being beaten by ya wife ;)
I've got my fingers in my ears... LALALALALALALALALALALALAA
No homo
Lmfao! But wouldnt Oral have been easier! I meant to say orals.. no homo!
I never run oral only cycles. That is unhealthy.
lmao you made the right decision. It would be a shame to jeopardize your health.
BigBmajYou could have easily shoved a dismantled pin up your ass bro. I would have used 2 20 ml bottles and taken a pin along with me. You could have taped 5 extra tips along the barrel and still been fine.
I don't know bro. Easier said that done..
If this is true you have to be the most hard core juicer on the planet...No homo..
Yes my brother. This is why I petitioned for my PRO tag.
Please see:
http://www.eroids.com/forum/general/off-topic/how-can-i-get-more-karma
No homo back atcha!
Then I would say you earned it and then some. Never have I heard of more dedication..
Thanks bro. If only BFG saw it as clearly as we do.
You didn't say no Homo! Just sayin!! And you hit level 3!
Thank you my SISTER! However, section 7.6.31 of the no homo rule book states:
When referring to jamming a syringe or syringe like object into your ass, the standard no homo is implied and not required due to the masculinity of the task at hand. However, it is acceptable to use the word no homo if you scream like a little bitch.
But the book also state that any man who complains about PIP is automatically assumed that he screamed like a bitch and HOMO should follow?
You forget the Ed exception # 4.2
Nothing Ed does will ever qualify as "like a Bitch".
I've not official accepted the New Testament of the No Homo Law Book..4.2 doesn't apply.