serious dating advice need help
Whats everyone's take on your girlfriend telling you a month or so into dating that she wants you to meet one of her very best friends. To find out that they, who hes a guy, had two fuck sessions together before we met. And their just going to stay friends because they don't want to lose that. And then the guy has the nerve to say that my girlfriend looks like a dick and theirs no attractiveness what so ever between them. So I tell her about my steroid use and not to tell anyone first person that finds out is that other dude will call him Dirt. So Dirt reenforces that there is nothing going on, this coming from a guy we go out with bec gf wants us to go see him. So he goes to bars and just trys to pick up every piece of ass he could find. Im trying to tell this girl he used you and played the friend card. Fuck him, sorry im pissed im mad and a little jealous dont blow me off to chill with him or if I want to go out dont invite his ass. And please stop feeling so sorry for his ass hes DIRT. So this has been going on for six months and im making a move to meet up with a girl who could potential be someone I want to date. Shes(the gf) going to go have guy night with them this weekend? Why is she going its guy night, apparently shes a honorary dick. So im meeting a new girl that night? Bad move good move? What should I make out of this? Thanks yall. 
UPDATE BELOW_______
- Bookmark
- 0
- 0
AnonI apologize in advance to any female readers for how insanely degrading this is about to be. Was raised by a single mom have all the respect in the world for women but NONE for most of these little college age girls and that's who I'm addressing here.
This is ridiculous I gotta help this guy. I see from your pics you used to be fat probably why you still have this huge confidence problem, I used to treat girls with WAY too much respect just like you and think oh poor me when they sucked some other dudes dick two days after we "hit it off" too. I'm 23 right now same age as you. You look good now time to get rid of that shit. You know why they didn't say bye at the gym? Because he's already fucking her and doesn't respect you at all.
First off the only time you should ever have a picture with you and a female up on FB is when you are either seriously dating that girl or it's a legitimate long-time female friend. THATS IT. Posting that like you did shows emotional clingyness/attachment ( even if it's superficial ) I'm amazed she didn't quit talking to you completely the second that was posted. Bottom line - keep your private/dating/casual sex life the fuck off of Facebook completely. I don't allow girls to take "selfies" of us anymore I don't even bullshit about it I just say no you're not taking pictures straight out.
You know why putting absolutely anything personal on FB is also incredibly stupid? She will know more about you. THIS IS BAD. You don't want her to know a damn thing about you. They love the mystery or some shit I don't know/care exactly I just know it's true. I use steroids have ADD anxiety issues and have a concealed weapons permit - how's that sound on a first date? You don't want her to know SHIT about you for as long as possible. The reason for leaving them in the dark is simple - every time they find out one more thing about you, even something simple or miniscule, that's another reason for her to not put your dick in her mouth. When you quit talking/having sex - that's another thing she's going to tell 20 people because a lot of women are bitches. They fucking love the mystery of a confident guy don't ask me why but they do. You could spend your free time volunteering to help children with mental disabilities and some chick will find a reason in that to not have sex with you.
Also texting because I already can tell you do it - NO. This is more time spent communicating that isn't in person and isn't going to lead to physical intimacy. On the other hand she can so very easily read something the wrong way or again find out more about you personally which means you blew it. Done. I used to ruin all of my chances when I was much younger by texting. I take hours to answer any texts now usually and I make the answer as plain as possible so she can't learn anything about me from it. Do not be mistaken this is a GAME nothing more or less. I don't do phone calls either unless it's like 5 minutes fk that if she starts blah blah'ing you are now busy and have to go sorry.
I wish I had your attitude ten years ago. What you're saying couldn't be more fucking true. I have it made now with a beautiful wife/family etc. but when push came to shove back then I'd be the guy taking the girl out for drinks so she could catch a buzz before she got split in half by "that other guy". Well played my friend, I hope people take what you say into consideration. If I was 23 again I'd be following your post like I'd follow Vikings cycle advice...spot on bro
AnonSo you "hit it off" really well? Then why did you not have sex with or at the very least get very physically intimate immediately? These little girls, talking 20-26 that's my normal range, live 100% in the moment emotionally. Oh so you connected yesterday? Well now it's today congratulations she went to sleep and woke up which means everything changed. Closing the deal should be done IMMEDIATELY or you'll lose it half the time, once you've had sex ( unless you suck at it I guess ) she's not going anywhere for at least a few weeks usually.
Oh so how do I close the deal? I know there's hook-up artists that can pull anything off in any setting but I'm not that guy/don't care enough to become that kind of guy. Go on a date with dinner etc.? Fuck that I can buy two bottles of test for what the night will cost and even worse you'll never be alone with her for a long period of time = no sex/intimacy. Going from connection to sex as FAST as possible is critical. The less time spent closing the distance is the less time you have to fuck it up. I'm not saying to be pushy you just have to know how to be sensual after creating a connection. I ease into it after several hours of work making them feel like there's a way bigger emotional connection than there is. I do not condone rape.
I'll use the girl I just started talking to as an example just about 4 days ago now. We went to highschool together and when I moved for school recently I started going to her gym, she came up said hi etc. no big deal knew she wouldn't be interested in skinny/pale version of me that's just how it is and DEFINITELY wouldn't be interested if she actually KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT ME. Kept my headphones in and avoided further conversation just would acknowledge her existence. More conversation before having already had sex = more opportunity to fuck it up. She graduated with a bachelor's from the best school in the state at like 20 manages a major restaurant just hugely successful overall and her Ex owns several nightclubs dude has money. I ain't got shit to name besides a roof over my head and am just now working on a bachelor's I shouldn't have a chance on paper considering she's also very attractive. This is what I'm talking about with them not knowing anything about you it works. When I started going to this gym I was out of shape from having two surgeries and very white and pale. Now I'm getting bigger again and got a fake tan within reason ( lol ) so she came up to me a few days ago and was like wow you look good how do you like it here - I can tell there's interest now if I didn't capitalize right then and there probably would have never happened. Only talked for about 2-3 mins and then I said how about we talk when I'm not out of breathe trying to work out let's have a drink, I'm interested in how being at blah blah school was I've heard their blah program was blah blah pretend to care. Had like 3 drinks then I suggest walking down to the beach because I want to be COMPLETELY ALONE with her. I looked at her Facebook and saw from way back she does some stuff for people with disabilities. Brought it up, made HER talk, pretended to be interested and kept her talking for over two hours. Didn't kiss or anything. She still thinks I'm the normal extremely nice respectful type of guy at this point I don't do any touching/kissing unless it's a slutty chick that doesn't play around but this is a good girl mind you completely different. I said it's getting windy/cold out here but it's still early why don't we go to my place and keep talking for a little bit I'm enjoying the conversation I know you have to work tomorrow so it'll just for a little bit ( lie to make her feel more comfortable coming to my place ). Turned on Netflix, began with my normal bullshit and about 4 hours later sex. Really had to make her want it though. This girl is absolutely not a slut at all either no fking way I know about 5 guys that she's friend-zoned they all want her. I get it in one day and spend like $20 on drinks. Gentle psychological manipulation is how you do things.
And think about it, I skipped all the bullshit and now have at least a chance at a real relationship with a very intelligent and successful girl that I actually like so far. Under normal circumstances ( not moving so fast ) I never would have been considered a real option, she never would have even tried to get to know me ( or sleep with me ) and now we're going that far emotionally/intellectually already in less than a week. She still does not and will not know about anything serious like my AAS use but just life type shit. I made a connection based on real ideas and things even if I planned it somewhat - Am I really being an asshole by bypassing this girl's usual defense mechanisms & taking advantage of the pitfalls in logic they damn near all seem to possess? Probably but it works so fuck it.
If you don't establish that "connection" on the first date delete her number it's a waste of time. This obviously doesn't always work some girls are too stupid for me to pretend to be interested in or they'll bring something retarded up like being really religious then I quit pretending and make fun of them. Shit happens
You really sound like me when I was younger lol.. I'm half ashamed but that really does work well.. just wait til you get even better at it over the years and you've got two or three of them in a room arguing about which one wants to screw you the most LOL
Chaz32621Wow dude what a wonderful post bro so many props to you man thanks for the help. And the time. Really made me relize my dating life. Im going to take a break from it find myself again, workout eat right and then go back at it during end of the summer. My confidence took such a dive after the breakup and I need to up myself as a person before I try to let anyone else in.
And your right bro shit people went through in high school im going through now bec frankly in high school I was a fat out of shape looser so I have alot of catching up to do!
AnonI had to elaborate so much because I see myself in what you're doing. I had some badddd confidence problems from high school being beat up by my step dad as a kid etc. we all got shit. You genuinely have to train yourself to be an ass. I know you're a good dude with a good heart but they don't deserve it and they'll use you for it - even the GOOD ones it's in their DNA bro. Good ones might not cheat on you when you date.... but she'll move on because you're too emotional or even TOO NICE and talk to a dick like me fuck me on the first night right after you break up that's just how it is. It'll break your damn heart too I had it done to me I get it. At the end of the day, I've never cheated on any of the few girls I've actually "dated" and I've treated them very good probably too good. I don't think treat girls poorly I just get them in the sack quickly and don't respect them usually but I'm not mean.... usually few exceptions
The goal seriously is to be NOTHING like yourself. Once you do like I've said and have it work once or twice you realize these bitches are not worthy of your respect.... then you genuinely stop respecting them and this no longer becomes an act. It will become how you actually think, because this is how the situation should logically be approached. Respect and trust are earned, not given.... you're giving it to them from day one. I sent you a FR, if you want me to go into detail more about whatever PM me like I said I'm no pick-up artist but numbers don't lie obviously I've figured at least some shit out..... and the biggest thing for me is 3/4 of those girls I've slept with the very first time they came to my apartment/house and I turned on my homie Netflix ( I fucking love you Netflix ). I want to get you laid and get you some confidence LOL
Very good post tryp. I was 29 before I figured that shit out. I posted on it way down there that girls don't want or respect a 100% nice guy whether they are good or bad girls. Part of being an asshole in the pickup game is called neging. Its basically knocking them down a peg or 2 and it makes them want u more to resolve self esteem issues. One last pearl of wisdom, look for lies, especially at the begining of a relationship. Kick em to the curb fast if u catch them in one. It'll save u a lot of heartache.
Anoni know "neging" will work on a lot of these dumb younger girls in the 18-25 range mainly but at 29 if it's still working they're just extra strength stupid. For me yeah it is about sex ultimately but I'm also looking for a keeper, I absolutely do NOT treat women poorly or speak down to them..... with few exceptions but those were girls I figured out were cheating on their bfs with me. Got a story or two on that topic one being pretty interesting since I was on test/tren.
I actually don't mind the obvious red-flag raising liars, I'm talking the obvious two-faced bitch type that you know is no good from day 2. I smile and let them think they're actually smart get a few weeks of sex every day then as soon as the sex slows down I'll just shoot a text over and tell her guess what I never bought X Y or Z from the beginning but thanks for the sex peace out delete my number. They need to be taken down a notch. I doubt it teaches them anything but whatever it makes me laugh.
I've treated my real gfs as good as I possibly could have though, both times ended on weird terms neither was because of "us". Yep, only two real gfs long-term lol. I'm not settling for trash.
Give them a vote if you find it helpful.PermalinkIt is not about being an asshole. Do you want a woman that wants an asshole? It is all about how you carry yourself. It is not enough to be all buffed out from the gym, it is about what you do with your eyes when you walk in a room. Keep your head up and scan the room making eye contact with whoever you see, maybe even smirk a little. Especially with women, eye contact, eye contact, eye contact!
But trust me bro, the asshole routine at 29 is not good. At 29 the girls you will be coming across are looking towards the future. Show strength in your words and your actions. Show ability to protect and provide. Show love and you will succeed in your quest.
I absolutely agree. In the same breath a woman does not want a boot licker. Neging isnt about going full asshole. Here's an example, I met a chick, we talk and she invites me over. She has pics of herself up. I pick one up and say, you look really good in this picture with your tan and the way u have your hair done. It was a compliment but she heard, you used to look really good but not so much anymore.
I'm 36 now. I said I didn't learn the stuff he was talking about till I was 29. Games suck. I really dislike playing them. Anymore I use them to weed out the good girl from the cum dumpster
I like this ^^^^^^^^^
Chaz32621Great post!! Now I just need some tren ace to help boost my ego more lol
Anonwhen I was on tren I picked up zero girls despite looking insane. I was too bat shit crazy to even try or care to try. I barely went out in public and if I did I felt like I had to take a Xanax to keep from thinking about how exactly I'm going to beat every guy I see half to death if he tries something. Seriously man, that stuff is nasty on your mind. I guess not everyone gets it as bad as I did but don't even play you don't want no damn tren in your life trust me lol
My opinion is simple and it's how I approached females until I met my wife: fuck her and keep it moving, if she seems AT ALL iffy, don't bother. When I found my wife, I knew it was different. Not saying u need to find wifey, just saying don't waste too much time on some broad you have doubts on this soon into it bro
That's fucked up. Did u tell him u trying to get with her? Did he know u guys were hanging out? If the answer is yes to either... go with what flash said. Don't know how to spell it, but I've dated some ricans and they'd say ur looking like a punta kabrone. U gotta correct that shit fast.
Chaz32621What is it my dating life just sucks? So i dumped the ex started hanging out with this other girl hit it off really well. Fb pics chillen haven a good time. Take her out with a few friends of mine one night. And one of my friends has the nerve to ask her out for a fucking drink....... That was tuesday we talked since then she told me they went and got drinks. Hell he told me too. So tonight he shows up at the gym to do yoga with her. I dont do yoga but the class gets done and they both walk out the gym with out waving goodbye or coming up and talking and saying see you later. Like I just got fucked, agian. Wow so what do I need to do now lol. Fuck my life!
You should have beat him with a phone book when you had him alone.. lmao the nerve to tell you hes taking your girl out for drinks.. I would never do that to my shittiest friend
I don't know bro... Are you projecting weakness or a lack of confidence? For another dude to step right over you and snatch up your prospect is an extreme dis.
Chaz32621Lack of confidence and its killing me
Yea, you need to work on that bro. It will haunt you forever if you don't.
Looks like you keep making the same mistakes again and again with women. It also seems like you've made the wrong choice with your guy friends as well. You are the one in charge of your life, but you're living it as if others are in charge. You need to make a choice how you want to live. You can continue being a victim and living the life you're living or you can take charge and choose to live a life where you're in control and you're making the decisions.
You keep choosing women who don't respect you and you've chosen friends who don't respect you either. Dump them all and make some choices about who you want to be with. It can be done, but you have to stick to it or nothing will ever change. I wish you the best of luck and I hope you choose the best path.
Smash him in front of her and tell her you chose that bitch over me then spit on her fk that,,
AnonHas he got a sister or mother..you know what needs to be done!
But seriously chaz micheal micheals..they both sound like they deserve each other..let them both go from your life..better off and use whatever anger you have left for the situation in the gym-best drug going!
When I was ur age, breaking my dick off in a chicks friends always made me feel better. Its juvenile but it worked. Getting back up asap is key, no point in brooding over a cum dumpster. Good call ditching her.
Reading thru this you made the right call. In your future relationships you need to nip any bullshit like that in the bud. Any worthy woman isn't going to throw "guy friends" in the mix like that, especially ones they previously fucked. Keep that in mind.
Chaz32621So fucking true god I feel so used like a tool :(
take a long , long , long walk away from all of them...
Don't b hard on yourself. We've all done dumb shit when it comes to relationships. Listen to Biz Markie's, Just a friend. Best thing you can do is just move on, act like u don't give a fuck and don't make the same mistakes twice. As fucked up as it is, most women need to b treated like dirt from time. It makes them want u more to resolve self esteem issues.
AnonAhh the memories of being a little bitch years back when I was just getting into my first few sets of decent walls.... I'm 23 also. Don't feel too bad I was a COMPLETE pushover needy beta etc. etc. etc. early on it's funny to think about now. As far as posting a pic of you and some girl you're chilling with for the first time on FB well that's just a sign of weakness and might come off as clingy/weird to the new girl unless it's like a group pic of people while you're out, but just you and new girl is an obvious ploy to piss the old skank off that isn't worth doing.
I say "little bitch" with all the love in the world because I was as bad as they come when I was younger lol.
Now the only thing that bothers me about pussy is that IT KEEPS GIVING ME FUCKING CHLAMYDIA TWICE IN ONE YEAR NOW >:(
currently taking antibiotics AGAIN uhg
AnonI can just about guarantee what you perceive to be genuine emotions is much more likely that the sex is just good..... and the whole wanting what you can't have thing since "Dirt" is playing his cards the right way by not giving a fuck (by the sounds of it).
The best revenge you can possibly get is to move on immediately keep making gains keep working hard in whatever it is you got going on in life nothing will bother her more. She doesn't care about you now but she will when she sees you doing well I guaranfuckingtee that - just don't take her back when she comes crawling.
Chaz32621I dumped her tonight when she blew me, my best friend and his gf off. To go hangout with the Dirt. Part of me is so mad I let this go on for so long and listening to her say that I needed help because I was jealous on a unhealthy level. Fuck her she's manipulative, hitting the weight tonight seeing the new girl tommrw night getting a pic together with us and posting it on facebook for her to see I'm done. Thanks everyone for being my last deciding factor on this.
Damn right and congrats! idk about the picture thing with the other girl.. forget about the bitch in the past and focus on your new lady.. youve got good times ahead now
Chaz32621I hope so to night will be the main dish I hope, thanks man
Well done sir!
bigwillyGit em son.
To be blunt bro, you've been a bitch throughout the duration of this relationship. If there is something you didn't like in the beginning you should have left, because more than likely things won't change. You're insecure about her fucking her friend before you've met, and insist ex's remain in the past with no contact. Your views differ, and I believe you are sticking around because you feel like she's the best you can do? Sorry to break it to you man, but she has no respect for you and probably isn't even that into if after 6 months she continues to blow you off for other cock, and not say I love you back.
Realize you've been a pathetic bitch, and by that I mean semi-controlling, needy, insecure, and smothering her. Use this as life experience and during your next relationship try to chill out a lil more, or walk away before being taken advantage of.
These beta male, cringe worthy relationships happen to the best of us.
he aint a pathetic bitch bro ....thats harsh
Ok well if you wanna sugar coat it then go ahead. I'll call it how I see it. Call it tough love, I'm not trying to insult him just wake him to how he's asking. I used to be pathetic as fuck, needy and low self worth to stay with some women I've been with. First step in evolving is realizing how pathetic you've been and changing it so in the future you won't be a bitch and will be able to walk away with dignity and respect.
Chaz32621Your completly right man I do feel somewhat pathetic that I let this go on. I am such a nice person and I let that bitch walk all over me for what? Some pussy fuck that this has been a hard lesson to learn and has truly helped made me grow up more. But could I say part of me misses her and yearns for her to come back. To change for me. Bec part of me still wants what in had but not being walked on.
pussy whipped bitch......lol
I'm with Details on this one. Bros turn into pathetic bitches with chicks, and sometime a little truth talking tough love is the only answer. We have probably all been there.
I am not much for complicated or drama. I would just remove my self "never would have been in" the situation. Millions of drama free hot women out there.
Chaz32621Yes and millions of hot women who dont have a guy they fucked as there best friend. Who funny part she's know a month longer then me......
bigwillyNot to get all bla bla bla but ask your self this my man. Are you one of those people that r just in love with love? think about that for a while dog. Theres alot of people that just cant be alone so theyll tolerate any thing to not be single. Oh yea it ok to feel like smacking that bitch, just dont do it,lol
Chaz32621What you mean by in love for love? I dunno I just hate change. And some of me hates to be alone yes but part of me still wants this, the sex is fucking amazing! ! Lol but that's how our relationship has gotten to it seems I buy her things and we fuck like om paying for a prostitute. Granted she cooked me breakfast the other morning lol but whole whoppie do lol.
Ditch her bro. Never make someone your priority when you're only their option
Yr young, tall, good lookin, seem like a genuinely nice guy, got yourself in amazing shape, which took lots of courage and discipline, shows you're strong in character, so in my opinion you are quite the catch and should def start lookin elsewhere...yr so young you should be dating lots of girls and enjoying yourself...23 is an experimental time ppl dont even take you seriously til after 25...so have fun....go out with the new girl see if there's chemistry...if not there are thousands of other girls out there, you're not lookin to settle down and get married you shouldn't be miserable...dont waste yr energy on anyone that brings you down.
Chaz32621Thanks for the kind words, your right. And Saturday night we will see.
do let us know how it went
hahah thata boy, just dont go straight for the ass bro work up to it a bit hahahahaha