+ 6 Wild Story Time!
I'm back guys! Another crazy job under my belt. Let's just say....I fuckin HATE the jungle! Way too many creepy ass creatures trying to fuck you up. I woke up one morning with the biggest tarantula I've ever seen on the tent wall inches from my face just staring at me. I about blew the fucker to spidey heaven if it weren't for one of the guys in my crew being a weird ass animal whispering savage and removing it.
It reminded me of a story from years ago. Without going into too much detail we were basically flying over a jungle in a certain part of the world and were hit taking out the pilots controls. While the other guys jumped out I stayed back helping the pilots get their chutes situated to jump. Being the last person to jump we were already so low that by the time I did so and pulled my chute let's just say I came into the trees hot a fuck and smashed my head on a big limb and everything went black.
Nearly 2 days later I woke up with amnesia deep as hell in the jungle with a tribe who found me hanging in the tree unconscious with 2 broken ribs and a fractured collar bone. I had zero clue where I was, why I was there or how I even got there. One guy in the tribe knew a couple English words, but not even close to enough to communicate. Apparently during those first two days I was coming in and out of consciousness mumbling shit about my wife and the mission because one of the words he knew was my wife's name. I didn't know that at the time because I had no memory of anything, but apparently the English he knew he'd heard from me. It was an insanely trippy experience to say the least. I was found 2 weeks later and brought home, but I can honestly say that was the wildest 2 weeks of my life and I saw some fuckin crazy shit during that time with them and gained an absolute hatred for the jungle.
So what's the craziest shit any of you have ever experienced? Crazy adventures, crazy jobs or just insane stories about a time in your life?
I love hearing about wild adventures people have had so I thought on my first morning back it might be an interesting topic.
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I sniffed a whole half oz of blow one night back in my senior year of high.school (did so much I passed out face on kitchen counter)woke up in a pool of my own blood with facial paralysis on the left side of my face. Half my face didn’t work for 6 months and I still have a lazy eye from it. As Rick James once said “cocaines one helluva drug”
Holy fuckin hell dude! A half oz in one night!?! You were the true Party Pete! Damn man I'm glad you pulled thru that to live a better life.
Yeah dude not my proudest moment and the reason I did it was cause I stole it from a “friend” and didn’t want him to know I had any of it, it was yellow tint so it was very obviously the shit he was selling. But yea some friend I was lol glad I am beyond that
I'm sure that was a really low feeling no doubt. We all fuck up bro. It's what you do with that guilt that makes you a better man.
That’s it man as others have said on this thread it’s the most fucked up situations that make us or break us. There’s a lot of us on here who have the grit and got it done and boy I’m glad I did
Summary:
Where: Hindu Kush mountains
What: pet monkey amped up on Copenhagen (chewing tobacco), hashish and opium
When: decades ago
Why: becuaee fuck it
How:
1) pet monkey attacks commanding officer,
2) commanding officer orders the death of monkey
3) random dude shoots monkey
4) throws monkey body in burn pit (pit full of trash, garbage, etc)
5) monkey not dead, screaming (sounds like a human), his little hand reaches out of the fire for us (we all sad, we loved monkey)
6) random psycho butt strokes the money to death with his rifle
7) we all sad and go back to our posts
Oh… I forgot.. traded a local native $22 American dollars and a box of ramen noodles for monkey, then smuggled monkey onto a fucking helo in ruck sack
normal/civilian life is gay and boring
I hate monkeys bro lol...with a passion. I've never understood pet monkeys haha. As for normal civilian life.....people see stories that others have been thru and think it's a tale or they believe and think that sounds difficult and hard to deal with. Civilian life is fuckin hard! I'm so much more comfortable at work!
AK80Must have been in the 90's or before the reapers and satellite stuff we have now. Much safer ahead of the mission. #ForwardObservations
It absolutely was and I couldn't imagine with how advanced tech is now the difference that could have been made, but I'm not mad. I grew tremendously from that experience.
Hell, thanks to tech these days I can even get on Eroids once in awhile in remote places.
Wait is this a true story or a movie plot??? What a crazy fucking life if true haha
This is absolutely true and was the worst experience of my life. I already know guys won't believe shit due to lack of trust or thinking whatever, but it's factual. The guys I'm close with here know my job and get it. Thought it would be a cool topic to hear about others experiences. To be completely honest it changed who I was tho. It was horrible, but at the same time life changing in a positive way that kinda gave me a new outlook on life. I truly owe it to God.
Bro sometimes the worst shit we go through in life molds us into the men we are. Glad you’re still here with us to share the story!
My life is pretty dull in comparison. All my crazy stories somehow revolve around drugs or alcohol which is kinda disappointing as I reflect on it.
There's many of us that have been down that path man. I never got into hardcore drugs myself, but I did start drinking heavily at one point in the service. I have PTSD induced night terrors at times...used to happen a lot when I was in a really dark point in my life and I thought I could drink it away. Found that if I drank enough I could actually sleep. Shit just got worse and worse mentally tho.
I'm glad your here now and focused on fitness and positive goals. Seem like a good dude and you should def be proud of yourself. Drugs and alcohol are a true struggle and not an easy one to beat by any means.
Dam dude, glad ya made it out and made a recovery. Amnesia and memory loss is a bitch, had a bad experience with that myself with an injury myself. Good thing the tribe were not into cannibalism, may have woke up to getting your toes kneaded off.
I have a shit ton of good stories but, like you I don’t go into details, it would be way too easy to know my occupation.
I get ya. That's where I'm at. I thought it would be cool to hear others stories, but too many people that don't understand think it's bullshit when they hear crazy stories like these I guess.
As far as cannibalism....nahh none of that. Bats tho and monkey, but aside from that it was the shit they did and their mannerisms. That part was intense, freaky as fuck when you have zero clue where your at or why or even who you are in the beginning. Things started coming back within 4 days or so. I was out the first 2 off and on, but then when I was fully aware it took a couple days and random things started hitting me.