posted Sun, 05/20/2012 - 18:16
223213
+ 11 THE RECOVERY LOUNGE!....N/A, A/A, C/A, or any other Anonymous drug program!
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Welcome to the recovery lounge, this is safe place where eroid members can talk about recovery, steroids and recovery, or any other topic! There seems to be many of us here on eroids, there will surely be different fellowships in here and they are all welcome! Other eroid brothers are welcome to come and join the lounge if they would like, its open to the public!
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Yeah, my lifts drop too much, dont have the appetite for the calories I need, cant ever seem to get a pump (and thats when I even get to the gym)
Thanks steer, I was beginning to think you had to be physically ill to lose your energy and/or motivation. I guess what my not very sensitive sister once said to me is quite true when I was lamenting about not having the choices(in everything) I had just 15 yrs ago. She said........... "Brother, I dont care how good you take care of yourself, what you eat or what you do, eventually you are going to be old and grey, and thats the fun part! At that point your skin really starts drying up and getting age spots and wrinkles on your wrinkles until one day you look in the mirror and say "Who the Fu%k is that? And then in a few years,(if you're lucky, you die." (Nahhhh, let me take gear now while my skin is still that of a 39 year old , from the neck down,anyway.-)
Do we really want to look like that grey haired guy on the testosterone ads who has a ripped physique with a 77 yr old face and silver hair. Fu&K that!! Thats almost as bad as wearing a toupee!!!LOL .
AND IF ONE IS ON OPIATES(which I am) you may not even be motivated to hit 57or 58 and still work out. Dont get depressed guys. I know that all the moderators on this board are pushing the vendors day and night to work feverishly to invent the "OVER 65 ANABOLIC". I say Banner or Big D invents it first. Do I hear any Yays!........ or Nays! Look, if a putz like Austin Powers can get Beyonce, I cant give up on gear even at 75. LOL (yes I definitely have my issues.lol )
THE FOLLOWING WORKS FOR ME; Let them find me dead at that age before Im too dried up: bent over the weight bench with 3 syringes in my ass,1- tren A, 1- tne AND 1- test prop, loaded to the max ml's.... a dumbell in my hand, in the middle of a concentration curl and my laptop sitting on the next bench over... with e-roids on the screen with Nitti screaming at some guy.."THIS IS NOT A REVIEW!.DO THAT SHIT AGAIN AND YOUR GONE!!!"What better way is there to be remembered than that???!!!!!!
I just wanted to write in here the substances; steroid-wise, that I would recommend staying away from if you are in recovery. And this applies to those IV drug users in particular, but not exclusively. #1- TNE or Test-Suspension. I say this because after injection I taste the drug, similar to when injecting cocaine, meth, heroin, or any other drug. This was a trigger for me, and made my heart rate explode immediately, and the anxiety was very high. Thinking about this now even makes me nervous lol. #2 Injectable Winstrol. Basically for the same reason as #1. I guess I could probably say anything with no-ester attached could fall into this category, but maybe I'm wrong in this assumption. #3 Dianabol. Wow, what a terrible choice on my part to use this crude substance to try and bulk up. Many people love, and swear by it, but for me it was too much. I felt sick on it. Lethargic, nauseous, dysphoric, anxious, no appetite, etc. While on it, I felt like I was kicking an opiate. It brought back a lot of those bad old times in my mind which in the end I used positively to re-assure myself how bad things were while using. Kinda like remembering the bad times to keep it green, or if you forget, you're doomed to repeat! Also, when I discontinued d-bol I was withdrawing from it. There's no doubt about it to me. Intense for about 3 days, and then it subsided over the next week until where I felt 100%. The feelings included: anxiety, dizziness, teary and weird feeling eyes. It made me nauseous to look at the computer for too long. That brings me to another side effect, nausea, and not being hungry, or when I did eat, I could only eat a little. I just did not feel good at all and it made me think about using. All these hormones did that, and that is why I am writing this. I am no expert in anything, recovery, or steroids, but I do have my personal experience with both. I have over 4 years of recovery, and several years of steroid use. I welcome any comments, concerns, or arguments against this. It's just some information that I personally felt. I'm not saying it will be like this for anyone else, but I just wanted to throw this out there. If it helps one person, my job is a success.
thats some good 411 man if i tasted anything after injecting it would def remind me about shooting coke it gives me chills thinking about it
Thanks so much for that info. Im five yrs clean and did alot of reaseach to make sure i didnt introduce any triggers into my cycle. Some of those steroids sound pretty enticing and for that reason ill stay away from them. Aint always easy stayin clean. Rather not take stuff if there is additional risk!!! Thanks again!!
No problem, and no it's not always easy staying clean, I hear that! Good luck with everything.
Johnny the BullMilk thistle has been used for 2000 years to help keep your liver healthy. Although it is not directly scientifically proven, it is indirectly proven to aid in recovery and a maintain a healthy liver.
Johnny the BullHi guys. I have also battled with a few addictions. I have my life under control now but I went through some rough patches too so I know how difficult it can be. God Bless You.
Thanks Johnny,
If you ever want to share some tips, books you've read, things you did to make getting life under control easier, feel free to post. We are all here to learn.
Johnny the BullI will in time. Very tired lately.
Johnny the Bullcongrats bud.
SEEMS I am running into addicts on other boards who think this silly herb is going to buy them time. It wont! So here's the links if any of you are on milk thistle. Not benign at all.
http://www.webmd.com/heart-disease/milk-thistle-benefits-and-side-effects
http://www.pbiv.com/articles/milkthistle.html
Ok your first link says studies are inconclusive but that it shows anecdotally that it does help. In the second link the first question is a true or false one and states milk thistle protects the liver, the answer given is true. Do you even comprehend what you read? Bro you come here with lots of half assed info and statements that have no merit. When you ask questions in the forum you dismiss everyone's advice. You need to stop posting and just start reading for comprehension.
Go away! If this link says milk thistle is good for you and not poison I will kiss your ass! Please go away. You always have to hunt me down and find something to say about my posts. Please put me on ignore. I cant handle you anymore. And this is not the time and place or thread to even get into that.And not publicly. I hope other posters will back me on this if this silliness continues.
http://www.pbiv.com/articles/milkthistle.html
BigBmajI felt bad about that comment. If you want help getting off tramadol let me know. I accepted your friend request.
Guys, How do you get off painkillers which Ive been on for over 3 yrs, when the physical pain of your 3 ruptured discs in your back, getting rid of that horrible pain which never lets me sleep, far, far outweighs any benefits to being clean. And the problem is I am on tramadol, which many users say is a weak "cissy drug" compared to oxys and stuff but what they are now fining out is....its actually harder to get off symptom wise, than heroin! I tried doing a 6 month taper on suboxone and also did 8 days cold turkey in which I felt so depressed I thought of putting a gun to my head. It seems I created a monster I have to live with. At 54, im figuring if I can live 20 more years without pain, its worth the trade off of living 30 more years with pain.
The biggest problem is at around the 3 yr mark I started going over the max 8 pills a day as allowable by law(yeah my doc gives them to me) and now am up to 10-12 a day. So every year I will likely need more and more. Any one have any ideas? Another problem is I live alone with no family in the entire state! And they cant comprehend the problem anyway.My friends are mostly douche bags. And I say nobody gets off this at this stage without support from either family or friends. I also hope some of you who use it, read my post with links to prove, that milk thistle is the wroooooong thing to protect your liver against anything. I probably tried it 4 different times as protection against gear and painkillers. BAD IDEA! Thank God my blood work is fine except for low thyroid.
Johnny the BullHi Silat. In the end its up to you to go clean or to at least go down to a safe dosage. If you need it for pain it really shouldn't be an issue but you must learn to use self control. I know its easier said than done. Maybe you should talk to a shrink or ask your dr about this. It must be tough to be so far from family. I feel for you bud. I know when I was far away from family and often felt lonely there was many times I used recreational drugs and alcohol to cope with the loneliness as do many. Maybe check out a AA meeting or dome support network. I wish you well.
Alright I have always tried to give you some advice to make my criticisms constructive. I apologize for not doing that. I'm not sure how your dr prescribed your suboxone, but from my experience its a very drawn out taper not 6 months. I'm currently in year 5 of being on suboxone. In that time I've dropped down from 24 mg per day to currently 2 mg per day. However maybe you could school me in tramadol. I was under the impression it wasn't an opiate, is it indeed? We can agree to disagree on milk thistle, but generally you have a great attitude and that's probably why I feel compelled to reply to you (no homo). Also good to hear you got your bloods done hopefully treating that thyroid issue will help with some if the other issues you've posted about.
5 yrs on suboxone? Thats the most patient taper Ive ever heard of. Awesome. I never heard of a doctor anywhere and ive been in many live suboxone groups that ever go beyond 6 months. Maybe a year with relapses and other problems...but you should write your experience in blue light.com and drugs.com boards and many like it as noone has ever heard of a 5 yr suboxone taper. May I ask why it took so long. BEST BET IS FOR ME AND YOU TO TAKE THIS TO PM ing so not to disturb the board. Juts send me a friend request or I will send you one.
And to the prior poster, yes I must try to find a way to decrease the pain in my 3 ruptured discks in my lower back. Suffice it to say, that after 3 or 4 chiropracters, 3 or 4 accupuncturists, russian deep tissue massage and God knows what else, as Ive had this lower back pain badly since age 25. At that age i had to start sleeping on the floor to get relief. No bed would do it. Coincidentally my fiance and I broke up after that, and now after 29 yrs of sleeping on the floor with carpet and 3 blankets of course, I am out of things to try, and God knows Id be retired by now as was my goal in life if i didnt have this pain. Im even in pain writing this letter.I DIDNT EVEN GET MY FIRST MRI TILL 4 YRS AGO so docs couldnt find anything on x-rays all these yrs!!!
funny thing is I am in very little pain in the gym but when i go to lay down, then it hits me. One specialist says my collagen between discs is deteriorating faster than a man my age should be. Thats another problem coming up real soon that could totally put me on disability for life in say 3 or 4 yrs. But I just want to take my pain pills and get some old fashioned medicinal relief. I deserve it. I suffered many yrs longer than the avg guy could without becoming a total pill head or addict. Im dependent on pills, but not addicted. Big difference. Anyway, I appreciate everyones help. So far no pain specialist has come up with anything I dont know. the only think i ever heard of thats new is ready to kills 5 yrs of weaning off painkilers. and to be honest, at my age i dont know if its worth it. But I will listen to his story. Adios!
Well first of all try finding the root of your pain problems. Try making the pain more tolerable also. Chiropractors? Massage? Surgery? I dont know anything about back injury but I'm just saying try finding ways to help treat the issue. Find options that can help you feel better.
Tramadol not only is a painkiller but it messes with serotonin and norepinephrine levels. So you WILL feel depressed coming off. Look into professional help but maybe switching to a milder painkiller for a few months then trying to detox that might be easier. Don't take my advice word to word I'm not a doctor I'm just trying to give ideas that might help you out. Look into getting professional advice I'm sure there are easier ways to safely come off the drug.
BigBmajWelcome back bro.
Today I am 4 years sober...AA works
Johnny the Bullgood job Pacop
Thanks, bro
BigBmajCongrats on that major accomplishment!!
Thanks, bro
Anniversary month! How's my fellow drug addicts today? Haven't seen much activity here lately I hope that's bc everyone's is too busy with mtgs and service commitments lol
Ace VenturaCongratulations! That reminds me, tomorrow will be 11 years for me.
BigBmajGood job brother.
11 years is more than just an amazing achievement man. Congrats! Wish you 11 more ;)
Ace VenturaThanks Bayzy, I appreciate that.
BigBmajAnother Friday... I worry about what would happen if I didn't have this bodybuilding obsession. I feel like I'm putting all my eggs in one basket.
Intellectually I realize that I should have other "passions" you know the typical things - family, friends, job, etc...
But I seem to need an obsession. It's a little worrisome.
AnonDamn, bet you guy's never thought you'd see my pop into here!
This section is a great idea. A lot of guys battling addiction are too proud to speak out about their addiction in person or truly seek help and talk to others with the same problem or who've beat it. This could definitely help some guys save face while getting help from others who share the same interests and had the same struggles.
I was eating percs and oxy's like they were fucking skittles, dark times.
Damn right, it's a good thing this recovery lounge!
I was fuked up on heroin & crack at Xmas time, got a script sorted out in February, and got off methadone few months later.
Almost feels like it happened to somebody else I'm that far removed from that lifestyle!
Come a long way since then. EBC is my next thing to tick off my to do list, working hard for it.
I'll be 40 next year, thinking about doing an amateur show. 40+ class. Positive goals work for me, way better than crack stress!
Ace VenturaThat's me in a nutshell. I'm happily married to a woman that probably wouldn't have given me the time of day when I was all crack and methed out. I've been working out consistently for many years and put on tons of muscle. I appreciate what I learned from my drug and drinking days, but it's hard to believe that I'm even the same person that would sit in a dark basement 24hrs a day smoking crystal meth, waiting until the sun went down to even leave the house.
Its a crazy world ace! I'd of never guessed you was an ex addict! I'm glad crystal meth has never taken off over here. It's about but not in the same way crack & heroin is. I first became aware of c,meth from watching dog the bounty hunter of all things, lmao!
Glad your happily settled bro. I know what you mean about not getting the time of day from your woman, it's not fair to partners if one is on drugs. I finished it with my girl the last time I relapsed, still pains me to this day. Ive gotta see her going about her business with a new man now! I feel like fuking him up when I see him, but at the end of the day I was all my own fault. Gotta live with regrets we make in life, it's shit but what can you do.
Ace VenturaOh yeah baby! September will be 14 years since I've had even a drop of alcohol(other than liquid adex waka waka). I had a mild relapse with coke and weed in 2002, but next month will still be 11 years completely sober. I was pretty fucked up at a young age.
That's too bad about your relationship. I'm very fortunate to not have a "one that got away", as I think that is all too common, especially with our types. Shit will work out though. Good things happen to good people. :~)
AnonYeah, took me 7 months, tons of subs and methadone to get off the percs
AnonSuboxone and methadone are hard to get off too lol.
holy shit fucking recovery lounge on eroids I love it. I knew there were to many big mother fuckers in aa for me to be the only one. In all seriousness though since this forum is here I wouldn't tell anyone with less than a year that steroids are a good idea. I see way to many guys come in put all there effort in to getting huge and an in 6 months they are shooting dope an 125 lbs again. If you want to keep your gains get your program in order. that is just my opinion
Seen that happen to....get clean, put on weight, run your program at the gym, next thing you know -40 lbs later there picking up white chips again saying idk what happend....
I was told anything you put before your recovery your willing to lose
Thanks for the encouragement and advice guys. I will take your advice and see my doc. Damn I wish I had looked into Xanax and its downsides before accepting that script. Hindsights a wonderful thing though.
same goes for antidepressants, ritalin, adderall, sleeping pills, uppers, downers, all-a-rounders..
Hi Guys,
Trying to come off Xanax after 2 years of daily use at 8mg per day. I started successfully and have reduced my dosage by 0.5mg every 7 days. I just recently finished my 7th day at 2mg per day and cant seem to drop any lower. Depression kicks in plus not being able to sleep and suicidal thoughts to boot. I should be on 1.5mg daily this last 2 days but have failed.
Anyone got any tips to get past this 2mg daily hurdle, Im really struggling.
Thankyou
BigBmajGo to rehab. I couldn't get off benzos on the couch. Id rather kick dope 10 times over.
I felt dangerously unhealthy kicking even in a hospital setting.
A buddy of mine tried to quit to quickly and had a seizure and crushed 4 vertebrae in his back. Be very careful.
Myself I'm on a maintenance dose of methadone and am working myself off. 5+ years heavily addicted to opiates after knee surgery.
Stay strong
Ugh done is brutal. I wish you the best brother.
Thanks I've heard that but I'm ready.
Ya man hang in there, go slow. Take it easy on yourself
I'm not a fan tapering quickly. You seem to be lowering the dosage WAY too fast. You are going to shock your brain if you go too fast, or could have seizures. I'd say only go down 0.25mg every 2 weeks. You were taking 8mg for 2 years, it's gonna take a while to get back to normal. Don't do it too quickly and mess yourself up. Good luck