When I was a young high school lad I was drinking heavily one night with my friend. I blacked out and when I woke up in the morning I called the girl I was talking to, since I remember being over her house the night before. For some reason she was really pissy towards me and didn't want to talk, so I spoke to my friend who I was with. He said we were being loud so her mother asked us to leave and on our way out I hugged her mom and kissed her on the lips. I still don't remember doing that, but he swears by it and the girl never brought it up, but for some reason we parted ways shortly after that. I did see her a few years ago downtown in the night club district. She was obviously drinking and yelled my name, when I noticed her, she ran to give me a hug, she pushed the girl away that I was with to embrace me. The girl I was with was so pissed, but it worked out between us for a while.

I sharted...... thought it was a fart ...... a fart it was not ...... will never mix booze and hakkah food again ..... ruined a perfectly good pair of slacks.

My whole life is one big circus show bro.

I was 14 supposed to be studying w/ this girl in my room... My mom went outside to put mail in the mailbox... She saw my light wasn't on... Came upstairs to my room didn't knock or anything, flings open my door turns on the light and starts screaming put you clothes back on... I'm too young to be a grandma... The girl was told to leave... We of course broke up... And I was so close... It wais almost a year before I was actually able to seal the deal...
Another time I was going down on this girl and my brother walked in on me... He says whoa and closes the door... This really embarrassed the girl, as for me I didn't miss a lick! That time was funny, cos now my older brother knew I was gettin laid, so he told all his older friends, and I jumped up a couple rungs on the coolness ladder... He was a senior in high school when I was a froshman so it worked out for me?

When I was in 1st grade we were sitting indian style on the ground in a circle listening to story time and eating our lunch snacks. I finished mine and ususally ate what other people didn't. I seen what appeared to be cracker right next to me so I went down and grabed one and ate it, I went to grab the other cracker to eat and the girl next to me puked all over my hand. Supposely she started to eat her food, choked and spit the food on the ground. I ate one of those spit up crackers and when was in process of grabbing second one when she puked the rest up onto my hand. I havent' been able to eat crackers since. So yes, I ate a vomit cracker then got vomited on.

This is gonna sound stupid.
About 5 years ago i got injured playing soccer so i was unable to run for a few weeks but i wanna it to stay in shape(back then i was 143 pounds) so me and my room mate went to the gym to work out, he was my spotter i was doing military press with dumbells & suddenly this chick that we both like showed up at the gym with this super thight shorts so i decided to impress her and got the 60's dumbells and i when & tried to lift the weight bit it was too heavy that my left arm went backwards instead of str8 up(i had to mention that my friend and i were paying more attention to the girl than to working out) and i dropped the weight in his foot. Long story short we were both off from playing soccer and fucked up for a few weeks. The girl was laughing so hard that she couldnt stop laughing, i got my crutches and left my friend in there with a broken feet