Guys,

I used to weigh about 294 lbs and I was fat. Now I am at about 215lbs and muscular. Recent girl I was dating says she couldn't be with me because I cared to much about my looks than her! Like wtf should I just let myself go!?!?! The whole reason I got into this sport was because of rejection all through Highschool with girls. Everyone says dont lift for girls but at first I did and now I do it because I like to. However I am wondering if anyone has gone through this, this is like my 9th girl in a year and a half that has pulled shit like this. Am I cursed now because of good looks and a decent body? I am still fat in my mind.. I am 25 and have never had a GF for more than a month, she also got turned off because I wouldnt let her grab my dick when we were making out because I think that is small too! Im all fucked up in the head. Im like 6 inches long and 5 around. WTF is wrong with me. I been so depressed lately.

2nd question- I feel also like sometimes I am not as masculine as I should be, I looke really young at 25 cannot grow a full beard and have a round baby face. I dont like it. What could I take to help "masculinize me" I would like a hard looking face and body. I feel like a Woman.

Btw I have done 1 cycle of Test E for 12 weeks. in 2012