A planet fitness experience!.... Or lack there of. lol!
I read a post yesterday about a gym that made people were armbands the whole time and I thought to myself what the hell kind of gym does that?? Then I started thinking about all the different gyms I have tried from small little personal ran one owner gyms to gold's to 24 hour fitness and then one experience came up in my mind that made me chuckle to myself a little and maybe one of you have had an experience such as mine. Ok, so I moved to a bigger city where my sister lived a few years back and when I got there one of my first priorities of course was to get a gym membership right away. However, I needed to get a job and was short on cash. My sister told about the gym she worked out at and said it was only 10 bucks a month! I asked her why was it so damn cheap. Is it just small? she said no it's really big and nice inside. I said ok lets go for it! I had no idea what I was about to encounter... we got there and I walk in and the first thing I see is a table set up where they were giving out free pizza. I'm sure I was stunned a little from it because the extremely out of shape girl at the front desk had ask me something and I didn't realize it. I looked at her and said I'm sorry what did you say? she asked if she could help me as I looked down to the bowl of tootsie rolls right in front of me. I was starting to think I was being set up in one of those hidden t.v. shows or something. anyways, I told her I would like to try the gym out and I got a pass from her. as I was walking to the locker room I noticed these giant siren like lights on the wall labeled "CLUNK ALARMS". Shit was getting weird at this point. I went back up to the desk and asked what they were and she said Oh, those go off if one of the members gets too loud or carried away with their workouts. I looked at her for a second, slightly nodded my head and went to the locker room to change and weigh myself. The problem is I couldn't find the damn scale anywhere! So I looked around and finally went and asked the girl where the scale was and the girl replied "here at planet fitness we don't believe anyone should judge themselves or feel bad about their weight". I could no longer hold my tounge. I was like so you are a gym and people go to gyms to work out and better themselves correct? and so people come here to do so and you put pizza in front of them and candy?? You don't put scales in??? how the hell are people going to see if they are making progress?? She didn't really have much to say other than planet fitness policies and blah blah blah. anyways I got through kind of a workout using the smith machine because they have no free weight bench or squat rack. and then finished up with the heaviest dumbells they had.... The 50 pounders! They must have thought wow he is strong lifting those 50 pound dumbells! lmao! To each his or her own and some of you may work out there... sorry if I offended you. (more sorry that you workout there though) ;) and lesson learned for me. If something is that cheap or anything that seems too good to be true usually is. Planet Fitness is on a "Planet" of it's own. YES, fucking pun intended! :D.... I must be really bored if I just typed all that.
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Never heard about these lunk alarm before and googled it. What the fuck is wrong with them PF scumbags? Funniest shit I've ever seen. Glad, that I've got a homegym
Oh boy, story time.
So I started a job that is a 1 hour commute from my house. So needless to say, it got difficult real quick to get my workouts in during the week due to travel time, work hours, and home life, so I knew if I wanted to stay in shape I was going to have to get another gym membership near my work. I didn't want to spend a lot of money so I went to the planet fitness that's 2 minutes away from my work and signed up. $10 a month for a gym membership where I could workout on my lunch break. I had heard all the stories before but it was clean and the membership was cheap. What could go wrong right?
Every person that worked at this location was fat and out of shape, and I mean EVERY person. Like how the fuck do you find that many people that both want to work at a gym and simultaneously don't work out or use a gym at all? What was the screening process for that like?
No personal trainers, which I thought was weird considering planet fitness's entire business model is centered around getting out of shape people to sign up for a gym membership. I don't use a personal trainer myself and never have, I guess I'm just used to them always hovering around at gyms like hawks trying to con fat ladies into giving them $150/hr so they can show them how to do a sit up. I'm so used to just always seeing them around I thought it was weird that the entire time I was there I never saw one.
No free weights, only dumbbells and machines. And there was only one flat bench you could use, which was always conveniently occupied by some retard doing curls or some shit.
Machines were ok, pretty nice actually because they weren't used much. But after working out there for a month I couldn't stand being restricted to just using machines for lifting.
Yes, the stories are true. There are lunk alarms that go off if someone grunts while they're lifting which is completely retarded. Let's make fun of the people working out the hardest at the gym, that'll motivate everyone to do their best right guys?
After 3 months I couldn't take it anymore. I cancelled my membership there and I had a huge smile on my face the whole time because I had just gotten a badass promotion at a Gold's gym in the area on a membership for $20 a month. The morbidly obese manager looked me right in the eyes when I said I wanted to cancel my membership, and with her jowls flailing about said "what, we're not good enough for you?!" In which I responded with a giant, shit-eating grin..."YEP."
Yeah, fuck that place.
Right on. I just had a social media beef with some mouth on a twig today. His only attack on me was making steroid comments at me,lol. So I look at this jackasses profile and low and behold he is one of these schmucks that checks in at PF every day lol. As you all know me from here I ran circles around him from there lol
Mouth on a twig. Hahahahaha!!!
People have been talking shit to me about steroids for years when they get mad. I just say, “I banged your gf or wife.” Even if I didn’t. Bahahahahahh
Yeah, I mostly just ignore that shit or flip the script and remind them they are on ice cream and cheetos. When I walk in a room, people notice. They will never know that
TronI disagree. They will get noticed. Noticed for being a fat fuck and laughed at.
That may be, but people like most of us here stand out from the crowd.
it is nice to hear yourself described as "the jacked dude"
I'd imagine it definitely feels much better than "the fat dude"
TronI love when people try to insult me by making steroid comments..they do it "jokingly" but in reality they're hating.. when I would come back from lunch in my tank top with a wicked pump and veins popping (I worked in a cabinet shop at the time) the guys there were mostly out of shape fat ass alcoholics..they would EVERY DAY..Make some kind of Steroid comment.."what'd ya have for lunch besides a handful of steroids?" ..they would laugh but you know they were just mad because they don't have any discipline or even self control for that matter..I took it as a compliment..I don't give a fuck if people accuse me of steroids... because the truth is... they're right!
First: your English has improved greatly. Congrats!
Second: I’m sure it has nothing to do with working out 6 days a week for the past 10 years.
TronMy alter ego with horribly broken English only seems to come out on one particular SI.
This made me spit out my post workout shake
TronHa ha!
I’ve been tutoring him. Felt bad about his brother passing.
KKBB
Had a fat dude that had to jack up a Dump truck because he couldn’t fit under it. Then tried to insult me with the steroid comments. That was when I used to work years ago. Now I just go crazy all day when I have nothing to do.
TronWhat kind of sucks is when you're considered the "buff dude" at work..and you do manual labor.. or if you help a friend move or just work with any group of people doing something that requires lifting is that they always come to me and expect me to do the hardest shit lol.. what really fuckin' sucks is That I go to the gym on my lunch break a lot of times..and I leave it all in the gym..get a killer session in then all my strength is zapped..then go back to work and find that they left all the heaviest shit for me to lift lol. I've enjoyed this broken shoulder in the sense that I've had an excuse to not lift anything for a while..I've been on "light duty" and doing some computer shit as well. Shoulder is feeling better though.. going to try out the gym next week but probably going to milk the injury excuse for as long as I can get away with it..
Dude I have an office job and I still have to do all the hard shit. “Oh hey can you stop what you’re doing that we pay you a lot of money for to hang this TV, move this office furniture, pick up this box...”
It does have its downsides.
Yea I just laugh when people make comments. I don’t ever deny it but it’s almost always coming with a touch of hating. The CEO of my company always jokes that I’m on HGH. I mean he’s correct, but It’s even funnier because he thinks it’s the same thing as steroids.
TronIgnorant people.... It's funny to me how people look down so much on steroid use... Here's an example.. I clearly remember going out with a girl a while back (when I was still drinking) .. she invited a group of friends and I brought a couple friends with me.. her friends were partiers.. drink and and stay out late every night.. me and my friend who was my workout partner at the time were having a conversation about the current cycle we were running..this drunk dude (who obviously has never stepped foot inside a gym) proceeded to tell us all about steroids and said "Dude that stuff can kill you! I heard of a guy that was on steroids that was working out ..when all the sudden..his heart exploded and blood started coming out of his nose and mouth and he died!!.. stuffs not good for ya man!" ...... We laughed so hard right in the dudes face.. but we decided to endulge him and act like we knew nothing about steroids.. we let him tell us all about roid rage and it shrinking your DICK and makes you go insane and etc, etc, etc... I just can't believe how ignorant people can be about aas..
Gotta love that. Just hearing random shit on the news or some commercial and being like “well I guess it melts ur dick off.”
He thinks you’re on hgh only and that’s what makes me laugh. I’ve had comment like that thrown at me. I’m yea you’re right but that’s not the only thing homie! Bahahaha
I know really I should thank him. Like oh you think it’s just a little growth? What a compliment lmao
KKBB
I don't ever waste time with denials either. They really have no clue, why educate them?
My wife and I are "The workout couple" at the grocery store lol
TronI've never worked out at a grocery store..you must do it often if that's what you are known as there.
That gave me the image of you two going into the store with yoga mats and rolling them out in isle 8 every other morning... such a newlywed thing to do.
Lmfao
LMAO. No, but often times we will hit the grocery store after leaving the gym so we still have our gym clothes on. One day I forgot my change on a hundred and they held it with a note that it was the workout couple. That is where it started lol
Lol that’s awesome
TronIndeed.
Truth
If I know you as good as I think he has some serious self esteem issues at the moment. Throw in a couple of get to fucks from me
"Conan, what is best in life?"
"Recent divorcees, and grape flavored tootsie-rolls!"
You guys got yer priorities all fucked up.
Bwhahahahahha I literally walked into planet fitness a few days ago with a friend and seen those big alarm signs”lunk alarm”. With a definition on the word”lunk” and it’s read
(Someone in a bodybuilding tank top,drinking from a gallon jug,dropping weights) I laughed my ass off. Wtf is this place?!
Let’s just say I managed to stay for a whole 30min and felt like my time at that place was complete(forever) ha
There is one at a mall near us and I always walk along the glass scowling at the PF people lol
the heaviest ones (dumbells) that have in the PF out here are 70's.... weak.
TronIts been years back bro. I thought they were 50's... But 50's..70's...either way thats weak ass shit.
Planet Fitness is the Walmart of gyms. It's for folks who can't afford a gym membership who want to feel good about being a member of the gym. It gives old ladies something to do during the day.
Now pass me some pizza, tootsie rolls, and oh yeah don't forget about bagel Tuesdays. Nom, nom, nom, nom.
I posted this before but it's just so damn funny had to do it again!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UU6pk7mVX48
TronFucking epic!
Iron sports response to Planet fitness..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBRG4RkE51Q
Ronnie Coleman works out at Planet Fitness!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_QPjFKqUF8
bahahaha! thats awsome.
AnonJesus, Moses and Jeffrey that is hilarious!
TronHaha! They wouldnt dare ask that monster to leave! They would run out the building and call the cops....oh wait! Ronnie coleman is a cop!! Haha!
Don't they have pizza night or something like that?
TronYeah! They had pizza that day! Lol! It was crazy.
SMH! Abaddon and I have been hitting the power lifting gym in our area, that place doesn't even have air... but you know what.. "We kill it there" always leave knowing we had one hell of a work out... Let those folks keep going to those fluffy gyms.. they will get fluffy results!
TronHell yeah! I stayed at a friends house for a while and he has a squat rack, olympic size bench, dumbells only went up to 80 but still it was great. I called it the dungeon. I kept the lights off and the lighting would come from the sun shining through small windows in the garage. I would do a little tne blast, put my headphones on and my hoodie cause it felt a little cold and damp in there. The grip of the cold steel felt great. Intense and focused.. No distractions.