+ 2 Been on for two years
I would like to preface by saying I am an idiot. I really don’t expect any advice, but I’m not sure what else to do. I’m 27 years old. I’ve been running a cycle of testosterone for approximately two years. On average 500mg/wk. Sometimes events in my life prevent me from consistently pinning. I don’t know exactly when I started. I haven’t logged anything. I never tracked pin days. I have done everything the wrong way. I don’t have a diet. I don’t have a training plan. I’m forced to work overtime 3-4 times a week so it’s hard to maintain a consistent gym schedule. I’ve seen the advice from the veterans and I chose to be lazy. I work in an environment where maintaining size year round makes my job easier and decreases the chance of being physically assaulted. How do you kick the fear of losing size when you come off cycle? I tell myself if I come off, everything will become harder. At this point, is there a chance that due to the sustained use of synthetic testosterone, that my body will never be able produce a sufficient level of its own again? Any advice on what you would do in my position would be greatly appreciated.
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I think you can bounce back maybe. Seen it done with people who are always juicing hard core cycles (like 2 grams of test a week etc) and just ran a hard long pct lots of hcg (LOTS) and he came back to relatively decent lower T levels. Get a game plan for pct. donate blood like pumped said cause probably have high RBC’s. And if you don’t bounce back then f*** it bro just go on trt. You chose to be on for 730 days surely you can keep going with a lower dose bud. Part of the game. Man up girl !
2+ years on 500mg/wk you definetly should book the next appointment to donate blood. Your blood may be like sludge
Much respect for coming on here honest and humble. Thats whys you have not been butchered by members here. You also came asking and looking for an honest answer and not just looking for that one person to cosign your behavior so you can continue. Good self inventory buddy. +1
All brothers who took the time to reply: I appreciate you taking your time to give solid advice. I kind of figured that it was going to be too late to actually stop and that I wouldn’t be able to recover. So I’ve used that to justify the continued pins and gave up on myself. All of your replies have helped me realize that I was lying to myself. I’ve decided I’m going to start a PCT protocol with HCG.
Never feel you can't reach out tho to people. You're not the first and won't be the last, talking is key. Worst feeling is to suffer in silence, your at the first step allready mate so well done.
Best regards.
You need a professional, and I don't mean the family doctor. Everything above is obvious addiction symptoms your talking about.
I have know way to try help you because you know what you need to do but don't, and here lies your problem.
Try the best you can to get your shit together yourself, but if that fails refer to my top paragraph.
I know someone who has done longer and much more gear. He came off when the gyms shut, he didn't lose much and that was without training too. You're problem is as big as your fear dictates it to be, you'll look back and wonder why you let it blow up so much. Get your shit together bro.
You’re absolutely right brother. I do have an addictive personality you are 100% correct. I definitely do need to get my shit together. Like you’ve said I put the fear into myself that I would never be the same and just said fuck it and kept pinning because that’s what I thought I had to do. I’m going to start the PCT along with HCG protocol and document it. Thank you for your reply
You really need to concentrate on doing a really good PCT. you need to get your balls working again. I would chill on your size bro.. your size is going to be shit when you have medical problems and can’t even go to the gym.
How about getting your diet, workout and PCT in order. I think you need to stay away from testosterone bro.. sounds like you have a very bad addictive personality.
I suggest you get your doctor to prescribe TRT (at a trt dose). He can get your balls working with HCG and SERMS.
Chill out on the size thing. I can guess what your job in.. and taking testosterone without any knowledge and guidance, will probably get you in hot water with your employer. I am guessing it’s one of the only jobs that truly cares if you are on steroids- and will test too.
Be smart bro and get a doctor to draw blood and go from there
You’re absolutely right. Now is the time to come off. I kept trying to tell myself it was too late. But I think I was just scaring myself in order to stay on. I really never considered the medical problems but you’re absolutely right. Those problems would make it impossible for me to do my job. I appreciate you taking the time to assist.
Tbh bro, you'll be smaller, but if you eat right and big, you should be bigger than you were when you started. The hardest part is the mental aspect of regaining natural hormone production. PCT/and rest will be essential.
Just do your best to keep in mind that whatever negatives you are feeling, are temporary. Don't believe your mistaken beliefs. Your body is the vehicle, but you (mentally) are the pilot broski.
Just understand that the longer you stay on, the more you risk not being able to comeback to normal production. My humble opinion would be to take advantage of the fact that you're still in your 20's and come off to use the youthful healing powers! However, if you are bent on staying on, I'd just lower the dose to TRT levels. I hope you find what's best for you and everything works out broski.
Thank you brother, I appreciate the inspiring words. Now is really the best time to come off and stay off for a while. I do appreciate the solutions for either route I would have taken.
Bearded has got you mate, for that period of time I would say aswell physiological side effects are in place here. The feel that you'll be weak and small of the gear, happens to many people over time.
Follow a pct and take it day by day, talking allways helps me. Either a professional or someone close, or even on here I've reached out a few times and found it helpful.
Good luck mate.
Much appreciated. I think you’re right, taking it day by day will help so much more than just thinking about the overall picture.
You’re talking about the psychological addiction to steroids, that you “need” to be on otherwise you’ll lose size...
There’s a fine line, I tell myself to save the gh/peptides for my off cycle time so I can continue to develop my physique and not take steps backwards, only slower steps forward. Note that I use words like progress and development Instead of size. When you come off, you will be smaller. That’s just what happens. Most of it is just glycogen and water that you were holding from the drugs, not actual muscle you’re losing.
Do an experiment and test it out. Pct, go off, and see how you feel. I find I’m nicer, calmer, and more ok with my body off cycle than I am when I’m on. There’s no pressure, no voice in your head saying not to miss a single opportunity because every cycle has to be a success.
The science coming out more and more proves that gains made on cycle permanently give you an advantage over natural athletes. I think more guys find themselves in your position than admit.
Just check that mindset. Yes it will get harder. Good. Take on the new challenge.
I highly appreciate your insight. I never considered to take it on as a challenge. That despite the loss in size, it’s forward progression.
I appreciate you sharing your wisdom and experience. I’m going to pct and just see how it goes!
+1
JanaVodaWell said!