posted Mon, 01/28/2013 - 12:05
9440
withdrawing off opiates FML
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So i have found myself addicted to opiates. It doesnt matter how and i would appreciate no criticism. I completed a cycle about 6 months ago and lost most of my gains due to injury and overall lack of motivation. I want more than anything away from this devil. Im no novice to withdrawal but i was wondering about starting a cycle to help with it. Ive got some test p test e and winny. I just want to get better and back to the person i was. Please help. Its embarassing to even post this shit on here but i gotta get my size, energy, and life back. Withdrawal will be starting in t-minus 6 hrs.
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And subs just get you more hooked but taking subs is more livable than shooting H or Pharma
JB ..how are you ? Still on the path or do we need to reset the clock
Just keep the thought of what made you wanna quit in the first place fresh in your mind !
And quitting can take a few times to result In success
Think about it the addiction started small and grew so the discontinuation should take a reasonable amount of time as well
It is what you make it! Best of luck
If you do go onto Suboxone from opiates make sure you wait at least 36hrs or you may go into a precipitated withdrawal. That is the only thing worse then regular withdrawal.
What's up Johnboy? Have'nt heard from you for a while. I'm hoping that you didn't fall off the wagon. If that's the case brother, check yourself in to rehab and start getting shit right. There is no need to die as young as you are, and if you have fallen off the wagon, that puts you on a fast track to failure.
CleyonWagons don't move that fast, if you fall of, then jump up and get back on!
Johnboy- great job brother. Didn't mean to be so adamant on the Suboxone suggestion, it worked for me but I know everyone is different. To get off of it takes serious willpower but my doctor really helped me out by weaning me down by 0.5 mg at a time over the period of months. Towards the end he would give me low dose Klonopin , at that point I was already clean off everything except the Suboxone for over a year so 0.5mg Klonopin he gave ne twice daily took the edge off big time which is funny because I used eat 2mg klonopins like candy 10-20 in a day and be fine. I've heard some horror stories about coming off of Suboxone and detoxing for months but I didn't because I weaned down so little by little I admit it sucked a little bit for about 2 wks but it was fine after that. Going straight from 2mg sub to 0mg would be horrible. Same with methadone that shit made me detox for 60 days once. I'm proud of you bro , u are doing it! I can't even believe it bro... I was never able to do what your doing, having the dopeman text u offers with money in your pocket u have some serious willpower and u do not need Suboxone or methadone with that. I was so weak minded that I couldn't do it cold turkey I tried so many time but finally when I let my head cans body clear out after a year on subs I finally had the willpower to stop it all. I have mad respect for you bro. Would like to know how your doing bro let us know and stay strong
ray3801Need an update man..........how are ya??
Johnboy, I went through this with a family member. This much I know - this will likely be the most difficult conquest of your life. You will prevail - this walk through the woods will not last forever. Keep us posted. It looks like you have some solid bros here. Lean on all of them.
'48'
So just got done with a normal 14 hr workday. Couldnt make it through 4 hrs without a shot before and i walked around with a bar in my pocket all day(incase i got edgy) and didnt take it. Had to load up a backhoe tire on the rim. The rear one and the tire guy wanted to get the forklift and i fucking beast moded that shit on the back of my truck. With a little help from one of my hands but still i felt good. Then had to unload it and roll it across a site in-30° fucking weather. It felt so good to just do shit. Ive fuckimg been in bed for 2 days. This morning was miserable in the morning with no sleep -well 52 minutes- got better as the day went. Idk im really proud of myself and im not really hurting. I fucking crave it like my veins ache for it but i know i cant. Im past the point of no return. If i go back all this will be a waste. And i have an appetite thats crazy. Im attributing that to the prop maybe?
CleyonBeast mode brother! Tearing it up, you'll sleep we'll tonight!
3 days strong. Chugging away. Got like 52 min of sleep last night. Score for me. Went to work. At work now. I walked in and everybody ran thinking it was contagious. Haha. I went ahead and pinned the first night and some yesterday and im sure ill pin a little today. Bit that's just to fill the needle crave. Its weird to be addicted to sticking yourself but it calms me for a? bit. Just 50ml prop ed. I actually have an apatite which is crazy good. Already drank a few muscle milk drinks. Vitamins and 5hr energy. But im moving around and not in bed. The times i kicked before it was in jails so itwas way worse. Try to make it to the gym but i have a long work day ahead of me. I feel stronger and clearer every hour it seems. My fliud intake is insane and vitamin intake may be a little to much as well but i know my body has been deficient of them for a while. Urges like a motherfucker. But its the first time I've rode around without a rig in my pocket it months. And its cool not to have to worry about pulling it out instead of a pen. (Has happened) anyways im the fucking man. Just sayin
keep it up and stay strong ;-)
Nice work brother! Keep it up. It makes my day to hear that you are kicking its ass.
CleyonHell Yeah Bro! Sounds like you're turning the corner! Keep it up and this will be a (un)happy memory soon.
ray3801Doing great brother! Through the worst of it now, all downhill from here. Been following this thread since the start and eventhough I don't know you I think to myself throughout the day...."wonder how johnboy's doing?" So I come on here and check on ya. Been fighting suboxones for years so I know exactly how you feel. Keep up the fantastic work my friend
Im scared of subs. I couldn't imagine months of withdrawal. It subsides the pain but god i couldnt do weeks of this. These 3 days have been trying enough.
Watch that benzo intake my unknown friend
Neurontin or gabapentin 300mg x3
See your doctor for them they help tremendously for rls and pain and anxiety too
It's a good medicine for an ex opiate user to take for a while after
Not like subs
Although I'm both an advocate for Methadone maintenance therapy and buprenorphine maintenance therapy if someone feels they need them
Pm me for any specific questions in your recovery period
I can spare some pain for you as I am very familiar both professional and personal with this topic!
Gator
i agree with you on the subs however i dont want to be a slave to anymore shit. plus there isnt a methadone clinic within 200 miles of here. im going to sweat this shit out. i do need help for the rls its killing me. i took a soma and it helped a bit. but im taking so many addicting drugs to get off one. i dont wanna get hooked on any of that shit. when the rls starts i do as many deep body weight squats as i can or flutter kicks to failure (which doesnt take long) can you buy neurontin or gabapentin otc? ill be done by the time i can get to a doc?
CleyonWasn't able to check this thread today, glad to hear your making it through. Keep it up, we're all pulling for you!
I've been following this post always looking forward to hearing good news. Good for you brother. We are all cheering for you.
No homo.
(Sorry, it sounded homo and I wanted to make the clarification.)
Thanks bro. Its rough bud. Really rough. Its hard to understand if youve never been through it. Its like the flu x100 and your legs move shake and kick and twitch and that will go away with a shot. And youll be 150% better like better than better. Xanax and weed and Imodium and tussin and seriquill. Im still doing drugs but its not opiates and thats what matters. Fuck me if im doing it wrong but its working. And lots of vitamins. My body has to be depleted of all that. Protien shakes as much as i can keep down. Thats all i can do
The 1st 2 days are the roughest bud... keep it up. After a week you'll start feeling good. I've been there/done that more than a couple times (detoxing that is). Knee surgery and a script happy doc is what got me.
What ever you do, STAY AWAY from Suboxones... I made that mistake and they were much worse to quit than goin cold turkey off of oxy's.
Another big thing is getting rid of the people in your life that enable it. IE: dealers, friends that use, etc. Good luck and keep it up... it will only get easier from here!! You're already done w/ day 2, that's great!
Bro im doing it! Granted im taking some xanax to chill the anxiousness. And smoking pot. But no shit. All my friends dont use. No one but the people i get it from and a couple more know. Try and get a little sleep and i should feel a little better tomorrow. I fucking knocked out 25 pushups. And it was hard like at 20 was near death. Its horrible how much energy it pulls out of you.
I know bud... the 1st week or 2 you have no motivation whatsoever to do anything. You'll feel super emotional, and cry at silly shit you see on tv or if you hear songs on the radio. Shit is really, really hard to get through. BUT... In a few more days it WILL get better. YOU KNOW THIS!! You're serotonin levels will start to normalize and you'll start gettin that drive back and as long as you're eating right and taking supplements (B-100 is great, or any multivitamin), your body will kick back into gear and in a week from now you'll wonder how you ever got to feel so shitty... and then 2wks from now you'll feel 10x better and realize you will never go back to that crap. Then 5wks from now you'll feel like your old self and KNOW that you'll NEVER go back to that awful shit cause it's just not worth the hell it put's you through.
It's good that you have the motivation to quit. Alot of times people quit because of lack of $ to keep the habit up, or something like that. If there's no reason or drive to quit... then it just isn't worth the work to get through the tough time it takes to do it.
Biggest thing for me was that I was drinking quite a bit on top of taking 30's. This put my body into a malnourished state... mostly B vitamin and potassium deficient. Which will make the depression that comes w/ detox MUCH worse. Believe me I've learned this the HARD way after literally 30+ detox's.. which usually ended up w/ me getting a bunch of cash saved up, then getting laid off from work, and having nothing to do but grab a few pills to pass the time, (thinking I would just take a couple then stop).... which as you prob know, ends up after a few wks as a daily habit until all the $ is gone.
A zanny here and there isn't going to make a big difference. Just don't get used to taking them on the daily... which I hear can be quite a bit harder to come off then the opiates.
I found that imodiums were great for the nervous, shitty, crampy stomach... and benadryl's were pretty good for getting sleep as I had no access to benzo's or anything similar.
Stay nourished, stay focused on the ultimate goal, and you WILL succeed!
BTW.... Best part of detoxing for me was the few days after having no op's, when you start to feel a bit normal and you can throw on some porn and literally come before your dick is even hard!!! LOL For some reason, I would always get ULTRA sensitive post detox... and literally come 3 or 4x when w/ the gf!!!
Stay focused on the goal brother! The worst is over at this point!!!
the cumming fast is the fucking worse. i like to fuck not stick it in and be done. i had a problem with xanax in the past but doubt id be able to get on them again. just using themas a tool and coping mechanism. the whole reason i want off this shit is natural enerrgy and focus.thats one thing xanax will rob from u. i want natural energy and beastmode 24/7, not noding and in a daze. im through the worst i think.. last night was miserable. my gf said i sat up fast did a half crunch and every muscle was tense. she said she was scared then i stumbled to the bathroom to shit and puke. none of which i remember. thanks xanax. i pinned another cc of prop just to throw a needle in me and im dragging my ass to the gym tomorrow no matter how bad i feel. ill walk on the tread mill with the over weight old women for a bit maybe even use the all-in-one machine just to work a little. then the sauna. this isnt my first detox just all the other ones were in jail or forced. this is all me. and im proud!
. 2 days. Puking and shitting at the same time is a blast! Took like 10 Imodium to subside the shiting kinda working. Eating vitamins gnc multipack. 2 packs a day. Another day off work. Drank like 10 protien drinks. Puked like 8. Powder protien has that grittiness that induces vomiting. Dope man came by to say what's up. Imagine that? I didnt score. Yay for me. Half a bar and a soma to try and keep my legs from going crazy. Tomorrow the gym will be open and i can go to the sauna and sweat some of this shit out of me. Ill just crank up the hot shower. Im actually a little hungry which is great! Wish i had some drol or dbol to really boost my appetite. Although that would make my bp go crazy. Im kinda proud of myself although i have no energy. And i mean none. Walk to the kitchen-collapse when i get back.
AnonNice read.definatly wont touch the shit..dont understand why you have bad seeds with your number,mite want to look into that..all the best!
Bad seeds have my number cause those bad seeds are who had the shit.
AnonYeah understood but a sim card is a few bucks..also read that your dealer pops by yours..either tells me you got no hope or your very determined never to touch junk again..once again all the best and if anything great read going on in here thankyou!
its a small battle won everytime i dont reply to a text or dont succumb to a temptation. it makes me more strong. i cant change my number because it is my work line too. it feels good knowing i have enough money in my pocket for a fun few days and i dont do it. i laugh at the fact that ive saved about 500 dollars in the past 2 days. im going to win. fuck the pussy shit. unfortunately this is not pussy shit. hope to get a few hours sleep. much doubted though even with a melatonin soma xanax weed seriqill cocktail.still trying to pound protien shakes to make up for loss of appitite. piss is fluorescent from all the vitamins im taking. at least 1 gallon of water a day. poweraide for electrolytes. ill do an ebc when its all over with just because. ill have to black out most of my body cause of all the tattoos though.lol no need for incrimination
AnonYeah dont think you could say fuk the pussy shit with this drug..all kinds of nasty going On there!
Be great to see you rape your shit up and win a ebc,i will be definatley cheering you on!
i dont know when the next ebc starts but im ordering about 500 worth of gear from my dog big d on saturday. test e or c at 500-600 ew
dbol 25 mg ed for 30days
drol 25 mg ed fior 45 days
t ne for the hard days
angtis =-sazq1``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
So that was the extent of my sleep time. some half ass cycle rant and then random letters. I had a good 52 minute nap. Probably all the sleep ill get all night.
P.s. seriqulll and melatonin suckk ad sleep aids?
AnonThats it spend your coin on gear..get a war chest crankin like the rest of us ex fiends!
the first step is admitting your doing a great job already, hang on tight its gonna suck.. but you want a better life brother.. i had a family member tweeked the fck out everyday raining cash on his dealer... gear is different tho ahaha.
stay strong .. do you have a AA holy bible book?
Welp 24 hrs down. Woke up at 2 am kicking and restless. Drank a bottle of robotussin. Dxm helps binds to same receptors or something. Another half bar. Shit like 9 times in a row. Pissing out the ass. Wonderful feeling. Just hours of hot cold restlessness and sweat. My god so much sweating. My skin is crawling yada yada. Y'all that have been through it know it. Im going to drag my ass to the gym and do a, push up. Lol. I went ahead and pinned some prop. Had to. It was either that or score a bag. Got a text at 130 saying some bomb china was in town. How great is that to wake up from withdraws to a text saying theres bo;mb ass dope in town. Been in a daze since 2 this morn. I dont knoe if i have slept or just layed there kicking and shaking. Fuck the pussy shit im kicking this one. At least my gym is like a block away. I can walk there faster than drive. Im going to go sit in the sauna and attempt to lift a.weight. doubt it will happen. Holding walls to walk. This shit is no joke and hasn't even started yet
CleyonGood job not falling back bro, i'd have texted the a-hole that sent you the message something very pissy. Don't even talk to people that you've used with for a while. You don't need that.
. I just didnt text back. You have no idea how hard when youre shaking shitting and cant sleeep kickiing legs blah blah blah. Money is no issue. So that makes it even tougher. I can go get all the tar i want 5 min up the road. Thats the tough part. I took the first day off work that ive taken in months. My phone wont stop ringing. I guess i just caught a random case of some horrible flu strain. Went up to the store for more Imodium and tussin and tylenol. And of course i ran into 3 of my employees. Fml. Like 3 more rough days then im through the rough part
CleyonI feel for you bro. Concentrate on getting through it (sounds like that's what you're doing), you can make it. I'm glad I don't have a clue what you're going through. I wouldn't with this on my worst enemy.
The legs. That's the worst lol. And tar, you're definitely not from the east coast..
The legs suck!! The worst. And im an east coast kid but im in the mid west. My source brings it from cali top notch but still... i just drank a bottle of tussin. Smoked a bowl maybe i can ease the jitters. Its like 5° outside so there will be no walks. That little trip to the store killed me. I fucking hate wd. The worst part about it, the only people that know i do it are the peeps i get it from. I hide that shit. Even from the gf. No support system. My gf doesnt know whats going on. She just thinks im sick.
Man minus the smoking weed I know exactly what you're going through. Been in that same spot more than once..
Fuck bro this shit is tough. I walked to the gym. Which they closed cause of some fucking community meeting. All i wanted was to sit in the suana. By the time i got back to my house i collapsed in my bed. And the total walk round trip is under 1/4 mile. I just cant fuck with this shit anymore. I used to run 10 miles every saturday just because and workout everyday. Not beast mode but in very very good shape. Now without this shit i collapse after a 1/4 mile walk. Its so depressing. I know i could slam a load. Nod for a bit and then tear up the weights. Now without it i cant walk a fuckkng 1/4 mile. Its sad
And it takes a solid half hour to walk that 1/4 mile too. You'll get better. It blows ass. If u wanna have a laugh see if you can find the southpark episode where Cartman has Tourette's, or fakes that he does. You'll get why when you watch it, it's fuckin funny shit
I wanna have a shot but a laugh will work. Ill watch it on comedy central.com. and yes it does blow ass literally
And i type this pissing out my ass for the 15th time today. Yay
CleyonHey! Body builders pay good money for diuretics to flush everything out!
. Only cost me about 20 grand nbd. At 500 a gram and a 3/4 g a day habit. Shit is expensive in these parts. A fucking d8 goes for 160. A roxy 30 for 70$ wanna make some real money bring some dope out here. Unfortunately it only cleans you out when u quit. While on it, its pinecone turds once a week. Its bad when the girth of your turds clog the toilet!! I can empathise with fags. Something that big around comjng outyour ass is hell. like 30 hrs clean bitches.
CleyonNext time you want to throw away that much money you can send it my way! Lol
Thanks for giving me another reason to stay away from H, the last thing I want is to be prison raped once a week by my own shit! Congrats on 30hrs! Keep it up bro we're all rooting for you!
next time i wanna waste that money ill send it big d's way. shit im going big this time i just have to get through the next few days. people dont understand how long an hour is when your fucking blood hurts and legs feel so fucked up you just wanna cut them off and it will all go away with a little dope in a bag and everything will be wonderful for 2 hrs then more then more....then your back doing it just to stay normal . this morning was the fisrt day that i havent done some sort opiate in as long as i can remember. i woke up for my rig and shit. its crazy. i just hope i can get some sleep and go to work tomorrow!