Need a Prayer, if you are into that sort of thing...
Has anybody noticed how difficult it has been to secure employment lately? I have 50 something applications out ranging from fast food to Meteorology, because I am qualified for both. I have a degree in Meteorology, taught at a major university, managed a 5600 acre farm and was a financial adviser...but now I can not get a damn thing. A 2nd DUI in 2010 before I got my life straight always hinders the background check, I mean always. Sure, I pray for the mistakes I have made, failed careers, an ex-wife, though I don't even know if He listens. I do know I make my own mistakes, and all I can do is keep trying to be a better man. I am pushing 33, have all of this experience and education, and can't even get a job waiting tables. I don't know where I would be without lifting; it at least gives me a purpose other than the 10 job apps a day to fill out. I don't really know why, but I wanted to share this, but I am struggling and running a little thin on friends lately. Once the dough runs out, that is it. I got about 4 weeks to make something happen. I have an interview today and a couple of other irons in the fire, so shoot me a little prayer if you can. And thanks for listening. It is hard to lose a wife, a career and a father so quickly. Hopefully they guide me; Lord knows I need it. Sorry for the rant, just had to get it out.
AA
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Here is an update on this story. I did land a full-time job at a well known national sporting goods chain with benefits, paid vacation, the works...I am very thankful for that opportunity, especially since I am the fitness man and gun counter man, two of my biggest passions. The same week my girl of 11 months moved out and broke it off because she said I had gotten angry and possessive, and guess what, I am mid cycle. It seems like I sacrificed a girl I may have loved for maybe 20lbs. That is hard to deal with mentally. I am curious how hard the aggressiveness hits everyone else, or any other personality change for that matter. Given the same choice five weeks ago, I can't honestly tell you I would have done anything different. It is tough out there, my friends. How do you all find a balance, seriously?
If you are really 32 years old you are way too old to be acting Jealous or protective. Knock that shit off for your future relationships. No woman wants a man like that...Be comfortable and confident in your skin.
I'm not trying to pick shit, but I have already been divorced, so it's there. I will respect your advice if you don't crap on my past that you don't know yet, deal?
WTF are you talking about? You come here asking for advice, YOU said you are possessive, I told you the truth. Where is the problem?
AnonI was wondering the same thing?
hi ;)
I find that juice doesn't affect my aggressiveness at all. I am a bit impatient and irritable at times, but its to the same degree whether on or off cycle. My fiance even said this to me when I asked her "do you think I get roid rage", and she spends more time with me than anyone in the world. If you're aggressive by nature, juice might bring it to the surface a bit more, but it's always been there. I truly believe "roid rage" is dictated by the user's personality, and has just a slight influence on how often these traits surface.
From what you wrote, I don't think you sacrificed the girl for 20 lbs. If you were having issues, maybe she just wasn't the one for you. You said yourself you would've made the same decisions 5 months ago. It's hard to deal with, but don't lose hope! If you had serious relationship issues then ask yourself, was this woman really my soulmate, or was the relationship a learning experience that will help me improve myself? My advice is do everything you can to make the next woman/relationship better than the last. Don't get into a relationship unless you know the woman is well-suited for your personality, and can accept some character flaws, given that you communicate and try to work on your faults/flaws.
I don't pray, but I certainly empathize with others. There is always hope for those who work hard and put their morals/ethics into action. Maybe you could take the time being a single man to work on your patience/aggression instead of putting all that effort into looking for another woman. And you can definitely use the extra time/effort to work on diet and workout stuff. Just hang in there! you got the job, so that should offer some security and allow you to establish a routine. Go HAM in the gym, get strong as fuck, and most importantly, eat healthy!
Good advice, Dragon. Thanks for the support.
AnonYour gonna make it man
I found a job in two weeks off of cr list when I was pissed at my job
Not everybody cares about a dui in the past.... I got one... But one thing you gotta maintain is positivity and confidence when going after a job... I go in a suit so they know I'm serious.... I hope stuff turns around for you... As far as losing that wife .... It must not be meant to be and there are plenty others out there that will gladly be with you but don't sweat that at the moment just get your job situation handled then you can go fishing
Keep your head up. It's hard out there believe me. After I lost my my first wife I told myself I'll never get marred Agian. I was wrong I couldn't be any happier !! Like they say Rome wasn't built in a day. Make small goals and go from there. I hope to see a wonderful follow up on this. Good luck Kid were here for yea. P
Dude, I am in the same boat. Lost my wife and job in the same week. I have a solid history of white collar jobs and cant get shit. Had to take a job at a big box store in the meantime. I have another interview tomorrow, but so far no luck on a real job. Found out yesterday my gym membership was canceled. I had it through my ex's work. She updated her status and they told me when I went to work out. Fuck...
Update, got a job unloading freight trucks with potential to be moved onto the floor after 4 weeks. Academy Sports is also running a background check not caring about the DUI in the meantime. Who knew, God listens to gearheads lol.
AnonUp top when you said you was qualified for fast food I could not help but laugh
Glad you found a job..... Losing a job or not having work can work on a man..... Mentally
Good to hear man, keep your head and straight and keep living your life right and you will be blessed
Good news indeed. Never doubted you for a minute.
I don't have the time to thank you all for your kind words, but truly, thank you. This place is much more than it appears on the surface. Good people, good words. You have my gratitude.
AnonYou only been here a minute... Stick around it gets interesting sometimes ;-)
bro, a little tip, when you are required to provide a police clearance certificate, a scanner is your best friend, you see, you maybe asked to provide it, but that's as far as it goe's, they cant ring up the cops and ask " is joe blow a felon or crim etc" its the same as the old doctor patient confidentiality clause, get the certificate, scan on too computer, back space out your convictions and print, they can only read what you give them, ive done it twice and worked a treat, i also just found out that any kind of stored documents from credit file to your qualifications and certifications can't be obtained on data bases after 7 years, so yeah iv'e also been going round saying im qualified in this or that and i gained my certificates etc 8 years ago inter state, works a treat also, p.s you can lie about anything you want, fingerprints are the only proof anyone have, sorry for your losses and press on with the struggle, work is hard to get these days.
Good to know, bro.
Got canned(fired) from my job of 8 years in the the beginning of march. Took a few weeks to kinda chill out a little bit and it felt great. Sorry this has to happen to you man but sometimes your del a shitty hand in life but it always makes you a better player. Don't know your location but have you tried anything in the oilfield? Even guys on the lower end of the spectrum can make $60,000 a year.
I recently tried something different. I looked for a job while I still had a job. It felt like offers were coming in from everywhere. And I was killing it in the job interviews.
Why? The economy wasn't that great. The only thing I can think of that was different was that I had nothing to lose. I was cock sure, aggressive and believed in my worth as an employee. Unlike when I was unemployed and worried about putting food on the table.
So forget the past. You are a manager with years of experience. Able to run an enterprise, managing assets, resources, and budgets. You are good with people, able to train and empathise with employees and work with 3rd party vendors. You have the ability to think on your feet. An employer would benefit having you on board.
Did you make mistakes when you were younger? Yes, and you learned from it and became the stronger for it. Own it.
Put this melancholy aside. Have a little faith. If you approach your job interviews with the attitude that you are a winner, you will get that job you're looking for.
Matthew 6:25-32
AnonDamn right bro
I will read those verses, my friend. Self-pity doesn't get a man very far. Thanks for the kick in the pills lol.
Whether you believe in God or not it is commonly said that God helps those that helps themselves. Brother, you are human. No man is perfect, (let him cast the first stone). For now, be thankful you have 4 weeks of fallback funds. Think about those out there worse off.
Sometimes a little positivity can make a big differece; however sometimes a fresh start is needed. Make the gym your second home and bust ass in there. Wish you the best of luck my friend, you'll be in my prayers.
It breaks my heart to hear you are going through this, I could only imagine how tough this is.
Sending good vibes your way!
Best of luck
xoxo
Sorry you're having a rough time. All I can say is don't give up. It sounds like you're on the right track, with all your feelers out there. Something will pop up if you just keep at it. Best of luck to you.
Do you have any skills you can market yourself? A product or service you can sell. Start your own business. Believe it or not handy man is big business! Just a thought.
Praying for you and your job interview. Do you think you could start a lawn business?
Thank you gentlemen for the thoughts. Much appreciated.
TronNow go out and get that F****ing job! lol
TronI'm not a religious man.. not any organized religion anyways. But I believe we are an entity filled with energy that we can project in a positive and negative way and that's our choice.. the more positive energy we put out there the more positive energy the universe throws back our way and the same with negative energy.I respect all religions and don't push my point of view on anyone and what you believe is what you believe and the power of your belief ultimately makes it real..you are the owner of your own existence and have the ability and right to live the life you choose. That being said I feel we have the ability to draw others into our life..people that have experienced emotions good and bad and felt what we have felt and I feel that is what has happened in this case. I logged in and read your post and it was like reading a page out of my own book. The difference is I've had 3 DWI's in my life and with any job that is a decent job a background check is almost always going to happen. Now, what you can do is do research about the laws of background checks in your state..In mine the law states that a third party background check is only allowed to go back 7 years and in some states they only go back 5 years so if that's the case in your state you can honestly answer NO on the have you ever been convicted of a crime question. Mine was fortunately 7 years ago myself and I've been a good boy since then. Got certified as a personal trainer, got married, and most importantly found a good job that pays well. Those years that a background check was an issue with me were hard. I almost lost my apt and my vehicle..couldn't keep up with my gym membership either so my feeling of self worth was diminished..I wanted to give up but as someone who is paid to motivate others what gives me the right to give up myself I thought?? I stayed persistent. You need to know what you are worth and that DWI you got 5 years ago does not reflect on who you are as a person today. If you are a better person and you know what your worth then you need to go out and get what your worth..you have an education and you have experience and because you have a DWI 5 years ago does not mean you aren't capable of performing a job and employers know this. In my experience most restaurants don't do background checks and you can pm me for a list of the ones that I know do not...not talking about fast food places either. If you want to wait table there is damn good money to be made there..I know from experience and that's what I did until the time frame passed on the limitations of the length of background checks in my area. I now work doing cabinetry making decent money and have slowly built my personal training business on the side. Prayer is good my friend..if reflects positive thoughts to a being of greatness we don't have the ability of understanding but don't rely only on prayer. Pray but also don't sit back and expect something to fall in your lap. Go to this job interview knowing what you are worth and if the question comes up about your conviction look them in the eye and let them know you are not the same person you were 5 years ago and immediately go into how you have bettered yourself since then to keep them focused on YOU and not what happened 5 years ago. And honestly a there are a lot of people out there with jobs that have far worse convictions than a DWI. Good luck and FR sent.
Thanks, that means a lot. And thanks for the positive thoughts today. You're a good man. Of course, I am sure we both have much more to our stories, but it always hits the heart to hear of a positive outcome. Have a good day my friend.
Go to sleep every night envision what you want. The end result to be.
Every night envision what you want the results to be!
Tommygunn1980Keep ya head up bud. I've been there, best thing to do is stay positive!