posted Wed, 11/25/2015 - 11:12
2310
+ 1 Need help with diet to lose weight
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My partner as just told me I look horrid and does not want to see me naked as it does not look nice and he would be right as I'm not happy with myself. The only problem I have is I don't know what I'm doing I go to the gym and as of today I have done a weights circuit that my partner did for me a long time ago. But I don't have a clue what I should be eating and how much my partner tries to tell me but that's the point he tells me not helps and I can't eat some of the things he has as I don't like certain foods. Can anyone help a desperate 41 yr old
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Just a quick update I have lost 9 pound since I posted. But still could do with help with my diet. Also a question when I do cardiovascular I run on a treadmill for 45 to 60 minutes depending on how long I get to stay at gym is this too much? Thanks
Running for that long is A LOT and I'd assume you're not keeping up high intensity the entire time. You can achieve MORE in LESS time if you mix it up. I do a mix.. Steady state fasted cardio (20 mins, lowwww impact in the AM- wakes me up, gets my metabolism moving and sets me on the right path for the remainder of the day) and then HIIT later on the stepmill or the rower for 15 minutes (or longer depending on what I'm aiming for).
you'd be better off walking first thing in the morning and again later in the day ... running probably puts your heart rate out of fat burning range ... I have found that that walking briskly works way better if you want to burn fat otherwise you are in an anaerobic state and burning up muscle
Thanks for all your kind comments and support, we had a chat today as it's the first time I've spoke to him and he has apologised and sed that it came out all wrong as my sister is a morbidly obese girl and she does not look after herself in any way, she's on anti depressants and complains about her weight all the time and he does not want to see me go down that road. We have been together along time and sometimes I need a shock but i told him even this was a bit too much for me and told him exactly how I felt and that there is better ways to help or encourage someone than what he said (which he agreed) I then went on to tell him that I would leave him even though I do love him which I think shocked him, I still don't forgive him for what he has said but I understand his reasons hopefully he will think twice in the future. I'm still looking to lose the weight though but not for him for me as when I have been slimmer I have been happier in myself.
I dropped the cards and it worked but now when I eat things such as bread,potatoes,rice I seem to blow up no matter what quantities. I could eat chicken and veg for a week but throw in a tuna sandwich for my break at work for the week and I put weight on so this week my diet is consisting of
Morning porridge with sultana and apple (aldi brand) + scoop protein
Dinner chicken breastfeeding with broccoli and cauliflower
Tea (break at work as I work shifts) tin tuna+2 eggs+ 8 small cubes low fat cheese and onion
As a snack natural yogurt and some pineapple and a satsuma orange
The fastest way to drop dead weight is to get rid of the loser you call a husband or boyfriend. My wife could blow up to 400 pounds and I could give 2 shits because I love her for who she is on the inside. Stay determined and listen to grrl and lose the weight because YOU want to not some loser that probobly needs to lose weight himself.
x2 totally agree. This is not the way to help your partner. Very Immature. I know a similar situation in very close relatives. The husband tries to encourage wife to be more active and eat healthy, but he has never, ever called her fat, ugly or whatever. Get in shape for yourself and forget about that looser.
damn right, you never tell your partner they look horrid and you dont want to see them naked. I hope you slapped him in his face for saying that shit. looks fade, personality doesnt. If hes with you just for looks then you need a new bf/husband. Just for that comment id leave my gf without a second thought. Thats one thing you never say to your SO, idk how id ever be comfortable around her ever again.
Thanks and I do want to lose the weight for myself as I have done it before a few years ago but put the weight straight back on again so I know what I did back then was the wrong thing. This is why this time I am asking for help as I don't want the weight to return and feel like crap again. I know it won't happen overnight and now I'm worried as we booked a holiday for Xmas.
bigmurphMy girl is freaking out about the holidays herself its a hard time of year to diet food everywhere. What was the diet you used before that worked and did you go back to your old eating habits that's what my girl would do and she would gain the weight back you really almost have to make a lifestyle change nothing crazy but something you can handle. It also helps if your partner takes part in the process try walking together maybe even working out together.
bigmurphMy girl just turned 40 so of course she started freaking out but my point is she decided she wanted to lose weight she says this a lot so I didn't pay much attention to it but in the past 3 months she has dropped 38lbs that's as of her way in this mourn and she plans on losing another 12 lbs this was her goal.The fact is its definitely possible to lose a lot of weight but I believe my girl always wanted to do it because she thought I cared which it didn't bother me I love my girl to death and would put her in a contest for best girl and would have no doubt I would win but all the times before she was doing it for me you have to do it for you or its probably not going to work.Get on a good diet plan counting all your carbs fats and protien. Get a good cardio and work out that works for you don't try to starve it off that will not work eat but eat healthy and good food that you like that still works with your diet.
Good luck to you don't give up you can do it set goals and one by one you will reach them.
Hi thanks for your replies but he's kinda right as I have let myself go my stats are
Age 41 nearly 42
Height 5ft 4 inch
Weight 11.12stone
I agree with kodiakGRRL.... This is not an acceptable thing to say to anyone let alone someone you "Love". I'll keep the rest of my opinions to myself also. What I can tell you is that your weight and height is not that of someone I would consider to have let themselves go. Plenty of women can carry that weight or much more, lean and mean! You may not be at your ideal body fat for how you would like to look so set some goals, eat clean and get to the gym... Consistency will pay off. Look at eating clean as a lifestyle choice, not a diet and if you're following a good eating plan and sticking with it, don't be afraid to have a cheat meal every week or two so you don't feel deprived and fall of the wagon. We do Pizza and drinks every Saturday!
No he isn't right to base his affection on your outer looks .. I'd bet a cycle worth of gear he isn't ALL that either .... you are more than the skin that you wear .. the shape of your body and the amount of fat or skinny you might or might not be .. there is nothing wrong with seeking self improvement for improvement sake but to say that to someone you supposedly "love" that's not love .. that is "I love you when you look like what I think you should look like" and that my friend is the truth ...
as people age they tend to put fat on especially women it is called the aging process we who do not care for it do the things required to either get it off and or keep it off .. we are not always successful in this endeavor in our own minds to have someone to say that to you who is your friend and partner is no friend and no partner. Partners are partners because they support and up lift you .... nothing supportive or uplifting about what he said ..
just my opinon I ll zip it on the relationsip if you need help with the training or diet we are here
Wow... I almost can't believe that I read that ... smh .. if that is all your "partner" sees of you then it is time to kick the partner to the curb ... I think we all understand not being happy with how we look at some point or other... There are many people here who can help and I see that Mandi has offered to assist you .. always feel free to come here and ask questions about anything ... if something you try doesn't work then there are always alternatives to be found and something will work for you ;-) You don't have to starve yourself or kill yourself to get to where you want to be
+3
Wow....that's incredibly rude of your "partner"! I'm not sure that's a term I would use for someone that say's something like that to you.
That said... I'm a 44yr old women, and get hit up for training and dieting tips by my girlfriends & women I work with all the time. I tell them to start with the diet... this weeds out most that aren't serious. You state that you don't like certain foods and honestly you don't need to, stick with basics. Lean meats, vegis, fruit, fat from nuts, avocado's or olive & coconut oil & carbs from brown rice, sweet potatoes or even a piece of sprouted wheat bread or a rice cake. Key is getting a scale and braking it down into ratios of protein, carbs, fat but as ask below, need your stats for that and some of these guys are way more qualified to give you a meal plan than myself. To start in the gym if you don't know what your doing, jump on a cardio machine and kill it! As far as lifting, doing the circuits until you get the swing of things will only help but it never hurts to have a trainer take you through to make sure you are using correct form. There are so many different way's you could go with lifting... I personally use mainly free weights and stay away from machines. I still after years and years of lifting watch youtube videos of some of my fitness heroes training certain area's to learn new and different things. Good luck!!
+3
Agree with you regarding cardio... Do u have current stats...?
Agree w/vike...bin ur partner...
Welcome BACK to EROIDs...
Bin your partner........ he doesnt deserve you.
X2. Fully agree!
You know...i feel like the OP is my wife talking...i have heard her say this a handful of times..how our diets and exercise are so different in comparison to each others goals..and she did well with cardio and minimal compound weight resistance...diet was smaller portions...
knowing you Med ... I hardly think you'd tell her that she looks horrid and you don't want to see her naked ..
Ur right...sooo right...:)...i wouldnt ever say anything like that...she just recently started back and is feelin better..i remind her about when she said she wants to go lift..i help her remember..and then i help set her stations up while she is working out. This keeps her focused and on track..sometimes we lift at the same time...