laxman3221's picture
laxman3221
  • 65
647

+ 4 Divorce and cycling

ad

Just started a cycle the other day and wife informed me she sent paperwork in to start arbitration to start the divorce.

Any guys that have been through this, should I just stop the cycle?

29 years married, 35 years together.

Steeltoad777's picture

I vote to continue the cycle and rise like a Phoenix.

Gsxr1000spanker's picture

If depends how you handle gear. I personally wouldn’t if I had to go through it again.
I’d figure out whatever makes your mind stronger and do more of that. If it’s going for runs, walks in the woods etc. do a lot of that. Don’t do anything that makes you mentally weaker like party drugs and alcohol.
Think of the long game. Don’t retaliate no matter what is said. Be kind even if it kills you. It will pay off in the long run. I went through this in 2008 and my ex is still very good friends with me. Which is important as we share a daughter. Good luck mate

In a promo × 1
Black90tsi's picture

You should do your best to try and record every interaction from now on. Whether that's with your phone or by getting cameras installed in the house without her knowledge. I get that this is the woman you think you know and have spent over 3 decades with. But there's just too many stories of women seemingly flipping an internal switch and becoming monsters in a divorce. False accusations of abuse or threats, poisoning those around you with lie about what is happening and how it's all your fault, getting you removed form the house because she "doesnt feel safe around you", etc. The shit i've seen women pull on the men they were with and trying to leave is astonishing in how evil it can be.

AND GET A DAMN LAWYER YESTERDAY!

In a promo × 1
Stokes500's picture

Continue your cycle, get in the best shape of your life. Use this negative experience as motivation to better your self. I have been blessed I have been with my wife since we were 13 and this woman couldn’t be without me and I couldn’t be without her. Your getting divorced because the woman your with isn’t the one bro no matter what time you’ve invested she just ain’t the one or you wouldn’t be in this situation. The good news for you is she’s out there the woman who’s going light up your world and make you the happiest you’ve ever been, look after your self get into amazing condition physically and emotionally and mentally will follow. You have 2 options sit on your arse get fat and out of shape and cry into your cornflakes every morning or focus on YOUR fresh start your rebirth become the best version of your self and enjoy the rest of your life .. as hard as it is you need to let mrs right now go and prepare your self for mrs right .
Be safe brother be positive and be Alpha

In a promo × 3
Mac12769's picture

Sigh. Damn bro, been there too. I'd just be on TRT for a while till you have an idea/road map with your attorney. You have a lot of financial assets and variables to consider as well I'm guessing, so a level head is in order. Was married 15, together 18 when I went through it, feel your pain.

press1's picture

I think this is one occasion where I am glad to say I'm not part of the club lol

In a promo × 1
Mac12769's picture

Yeah you don't ever want to join it Nea

On the plus side, despite it taking some time, I became a better person for it and out of it.
I'm in better shape now, than I've been in maybe 15 years, put down the bottle, and found the woman I should've the first time.

JakeKO's picture

Same here, Bro!

press1's picture

For sure mate, I've always been a believer in things happening for a reason.

In a promo × 1
JakeKO's picture

Ugh!!! I’m so sorry, Bro. Divorce is a very rough ride. I went through a bad one in 2007 after 13 years of marriage, 20 years together. From best friend to nemesis almost over night. About five years of craziness until I finally met the right girl. 17 years later and my ex-witch still takes me to court every year for more child support. Such a miserable bitch. She wanted the divorce, but still can’t seem to leave me alone. These days she works her witchery through our 20 year old daughter. I can only hope your children are grown, and you don’t have to go through why I’ve been going through. Good luck, Brother.

Note: she is probably recording every word you say at this point. Watch what you say, because she can say you’re a rager and get a restraining order and have you banned from your own home. Miserable experience. I won in the end, but it cost me a lot of money to prove she was lying. Be very careful moving forward.

wanted's picture

Even if she brings up steroids what is she gona get. Theres no kids involved. I would stay on cycle FOCUS on MYSELF and kick ass. Be the best MOFO you can be and you will be shocked how many new (friends) lol you will meet. Life isnt over —- A new chapter is being started

In a promo × 1
MurderHornet2020's picture

Oh damn bro sorry to hear that. I got divorced myself in 2020. I wasn’t on gear during the divorce but ended up cycling like 4 months later. Being cycled up on test and other compounds for me personally gives me that care free not give a fuck attitude. Actually helps me get through things. Just remember if you plan to PCT your issues will be there waiting for you too. Personally if it was me and I wasn’t worried my wife was going to snitch I’d just execute my planned cycle.

NYButwhy's picture

Hey, went through this DM me. Info for you that is imperative to you not having any issues at all.

jaye363636's picture

If your steroid use is going to become an issue during court proceedings then I would say stop. You dont want anything coming back to bite you in the ass. That being said, if it isn't going to be used against you in the courtroom then I would say go hard bro. During my divorce the gym became my sanctuary. It was an integral part of what allowed me to press forward through that whole ordeal.

Chad P's picture

I owe you an extra upvote for your avatar

sandman3698's picture

Sorry to hear this. Hope things get worked out smoothly either way it goes.

Pumped_'s picture

Is she going to bring up illegal use of steroids in court when shit really hits the fan? Is she is trying to prove your use and that it altered your mood and relationship and so its for fault that the marriage is unreconsileable?

Wildling's picture

The gym may become your safe place.

In a promo × 1
AK80's picture

Well, now we know it isn't the Tren. That stuff can make you do things and say things you normally wouldn't do. Anyway, if she isn't happy then you could always ask her why and see if you can fix it. Offer to go to counseling, etc. Keep the cycle going and stay healthy physically and mentally.

Chad P's picture

Idk man. Personally I feel like counseling is for couples that haven’t been together their entire adult lives and are going through a rough patch. 35 years together with 29 married is a very long time, it’s more than likely a situation where feelings fade away and the love fizzles out. I definitely agree with keeping the cycle going, it could give him a distraction and add some real positivity during a rough time, which I’m sure he’ll get through.

ForeverFitBod1's picture

It depends. If cycling gear is one of the reasons that is causing the separation, and you really don't want to separate. Then yes.

If that is not the case, I don't feel you should let her dictate your life any further. Smaller, lighter cycles is the key to balance. Being on gear through a stressful situation it can really go either way...

In a promo × 1
laxman3221's picture

Not a reason

In a promo × 2
Black90tsi's picture

I dont think there's a simple answer here. Are you running anything that will effect your mental stability? It's one thing if you're running 4-500 mg of test and an oral and another if you're running some cocktail that includes large doses of deca, npp or tren. And even then it comes down to how those compounds tend to effect you. Dose your soon to be ex know you're running anything? Make damn sure there's no way she can use any of this against you in court.

Sorry for your situation. But you best be prepared for her to play as dirty as possible. Not saying she will. You know her better than any of us. But way too many guys have been blindsided in a divorce when the woman they thought they knew turned into an unreasonable, spiteful cunt they had no idea ever existed. Do whatever you need to to protect yourself, and kids if there are any. Cancel any shared credit cards, evenly split the bank accounts and move your half into a new account she has no access, remove anything in safety deposit boxes you don't want to disappear and above all go get yourself a shark of a female lawyer now and follow everything she says to the letter.

You can get through this.

In a promo × 1
laxman3221's picture

Test 500
NPP 300
Dhb 300
Drol 50 for first 2 weeks.

In a promo × 2
press1's picture

You will probably feel more relaxed and level headed if you were to remove the Anadrol and DHB for the time being, that way you can still feel the positive well being effects of being on cycle without any possible hostility or aggression if you are going through the courts and it gets messy.

In a promo × 1
laxman3221's picture

I guess I’ll go back to trt dose. Maybe up ithe t a little. And keep Deca at the same.

In a promo × 2
Black90tsi's picture

Maybe remove the npp too if he's someone who tends to get depressed/anxious because of it.

In a promo × 1
anvil's picture

Why would you stop? Is she going to be using this against you? I am guessing you have no minor children.

In a promo × 1
press1's picture

It depends on how you are feeling about the divorce buddy, if it is mutual and you will be able to carry on eating and training as normal then I would continue it, but if that is going to be difficult then I would stop it and restart when things are more stable and grounded in your life.

In a promo × 1
laxman3221's picture

It’s her choice, empty nest and not happy.

In a promo × 2
Chad P's picture

Brother it’s better to end a relationship where both ppl aren’t happy than to stay in it and try holding on to something that isn’t there anymore. How old are you? Are you in a good place financially with your job? 35 years together is a long time, so I’m sure it’s something that’s been building for a while.

press1's picture

Is it because your children have left and she is wanting more kids? Have you talked about what would make her happy or has it gone beyond that stage?

In a promo × 1
laxman3221's picture

Kid is gone. She is 54 too.

Tried councling and I had floated the idea of trying again.

In a promo × 2
Chad P's picture

Brother if this is what it’s come to, you have to accept what’s happening and shift your focus to the future. Don’t hold yourself back and miss out on potential opportunities because you can’t let go and are waiting for her to change her mind. You have a lot of good years left and deserve to be happy. Time to put yourself first and focus on things that you want to do, you’ve spent your life focusing on her. I believe it’s going to work out for you and you’ll find the happiness you deserve.

press1's picture

It sounds to me buddy as if she is thinking the grass might be greaner on the other side, without realising just how good a thing she has with you already. Maybe the thing to do for now is go along with what she wants and let her find out for herself what is best for her. You can't force people to feel a certain way as we all have found out in life, maybe if its because she feels you don't make as much effort anymore in the relationship then try doing more things with her, go away and make a fuss over her - only you really knows the root issues of it all though mate Smile

In a promo × 1
press1's picture

I swear that 90% of women only care about themselves and their own personal happiness, fuck anybody else and how they feel in it all. If they are not happy then the whole world has to bend and revolve around them until they are. She's not happy in the relationship anymore, so goes out looking for someone else who bends to her every needs and moans. Sod the fact you have been at work all day and feel knackered when you get home and aren't in the mood to talk mindless gossip about other people.

In a promo × 1
Black90tsi's picture

As soon as you hear her say "i'm not happy" you need to realize the countdown to the end of the relationship has already started. Nobody is responsible for your happiness besides yourself. Seems most people these days have forgotten that. I might be biased here but it def seems to come more from the female side of relationships than the male.

I've seen so many relationships end because of this exact thing. Yet i know several couples who have been together over 20 years since high school and still seem to be happy. I'd love to find the right person to have what my parents do with. I'm just really doubtful that such a thing is even possible anymore.

In a promo × 1
Jaxattax86's picture

I don’t think such a thing really exists anymore, either. I’m 37 and completely gave up on dating. The dating pool consists of girls (women) with 3 kids and 4 baby daddies that claim “they want a real man and if you’re only looking to fuck, keep it moving” followed by a crazy “checklist” of what they want in a guy, then talk shit about how “there are no good guys out there, they’re all the same”. No lady, the good guys are out there…we just don’t want to date someone that comes with 3 kids, while you’re most likely still fucking at least one of the kids fathers. Social media has also completely ruined everything, and all these women think they’re the hottest thing in the world now because guys spam their inbox. On top of that, they all use filters and angles and don’t even look like the pics you see when you meet them IRL.

Then if you do manage to find one that gives you the time of day, they’re talking to 3 other guys at the same time but “tHeY R oNLy fRieNDs” lmao yeah okay, heard that before. Then once they got everything they can from you, they kick you to the curb and move on to the next guy…only to hit you back up a year or two later “I should’ve never left you” or “I messed up and lost you”, usually after said guy they left you for knocks them up and then leaves them once they’re pregnant lmfao.

Shit sucks man. God forbid you try to initiate conversation with someone you find intriguing, you end up being called “thirsty” or just plain ignored in the mix of 100+ other guys in their inbox. I’ve pretty much accepted the fact that I’ll be alone the rest of my life. It is what it is. I won’t settle for just any girl because they gave me attention. I want someone who can match my energy, and isn’t just going to bail because things are hard or something stupid.

Black90tsi's picture

I voluntarily checked out of dating for years. There are still good women out there. They just happen to be the exception not the rule. Most women's checklist of things guys need to have is just plain ridiculous. There's probably no man on the planet that meets all of them and if there is he's the top .00001% of the male population and has his pick of whoever he wants basically whenever he wants. But somehow these girls who are entitled, selfish, average face at best and 30+ lbs overweight think that's exactly who they deserve just for existing and won't settle for anything less. There was a study done a while where they took a bunch of men and a bunch of women and surveyed them on the topic of "if you found a guy/girl who met 80% of your requirements would you settle with them?" Take a wild guess which side overwhelmingly said yes and which said no?

Social media and dating apps have absolutely done tremendous damage to society. Everyone has instant access to as much attention and validation as they want in their pockets at all times. Obviously that skews way towards women in general on the positive end. They can find a half dozen guys to give them attention on any of the dating apps or social media in minutes. Men tend to find the other side of attention and validation. Basically none if you don't run the numbers game high enough if your just an average dude. Everyone seems to ready to just move on at the first sign in a relationship not being absolutely perfect instead of working through their issues. Seems like nobody understands that there's no such a thing as a perfect relationship. That good/great relationships require tons of consistent effort and that through that effort you and your partner knock the rough edges off each other and become even better suited for each other.

The hope of finding a great partner isn't dead. But it sure is on life support and i completely understand why so many guys are just checking out entirely.

In a promo × 1
Shitsy43's picture

Yep, dating is sad nowadays.

Chad P's picture

I’m lucky enough to be in that situation. My wife and I have been together since early high school years. 17 married with 28 together. It’s very important to keep the spark there and not let it disappear, once that happens it’s gone forever.

Black90tsi's picture

Lots of people seem to forget to continue to date your partner. People just get comfortable and stop putting in the effort. Both into the relationship and into themselves. Next thing you know neither of you are the person the other fell for in the first place.

In a promo × 1
wanted's picture

Yup they get LAZY

In a promo × 1
Black90tsi's picture

Both partners can and do get lazy frequently. It takes 2 to make a relationship work long term. Though that's not to say that sometimes it isn't just one party that stops giving a shit or thinks that there's no way their partner would ever leave them so they stop trying.

Always let your partner know that you WANT to be with them. You don't NEED to be with them. While i would rather be in a relationship with a good partner. I'm perfectly content to be on my own and do my own thing. If whoever your with thinks that they've got you wrapped around their finger and that no matter what you'd never leave them they will stop respecting you and start taking advantage of you. Adult relationships should never include unconditional love. If someone treats you like shit and doesn't respect you then you don't stay with them. Period. We teach people how to treat us by showing them what we will tolerate. If you tolerate someone cheating, being abusive or disrespectful towards you then that's what you'll continue getting. No woman who truly loves and respects her man will ever do shit like that.

In a promo × 1
anvil's picture

Nice job brother! I will prolly on my third or fourth marriage before I figure it out.

In a promo × 1
press1's picture

You also sound like a Good, amicable and grounded bloke mate - I imagine if there was a problem in the relationship you would be the first to sit down with your wife and discuss it like 2 responsible adults. One of my faults was I chose to brush things under the table when I knew things were going wrong, drinking never helped those kind of situations and just hoping things would sort out.

In a promo × 1
Chad P's picture

Drinking creates problems and makes existing problems worse. We both made the decision about 6 years ago that if we wanted to be our best for each other and for our daughters that drinking was no longer gonna be a part of our lives. I can say with full conviction it was the best decision we ever made.

press1's picture

LMFAO - The Countdown has already begun!!! You better believe it Bro. And she already has that special someone lined up and primed to take your place to make her happy, its just a case of how quickly she can get rid of you now.

And you also better believe that NOTHING is going to remove that permanently forced, unhappy, resting bitch face she has across her now no matter what you try to do to make her 'happy'. Yeah they feel to realise that it isn't your 'Job' and purpose in life to make her happy, she has to get out of the front door and do that for herself.

It doesn't really take that much for a Male to be a happy, some nice food on a night, a shag every now and again if she can be bothered to make the effort, a good film, a few days away. A woman to be content and happy? You'll be lucky ..

In a promo × 1
Black90tsi's picture

Next thing you know she's making tiktoks asking "where did all the good men go!?!?" You had a good man. You threw him away because you wanted some new and exciting D like all these online thots are preaching you deserve. Now your 40+ and all you can find is a bunch of guys that want to sleep with you a few times and move on to the next.

Time to start investing in boxed wine and kitty litter companies boys. We're gonna be rich.

In a promo × 1
Chad P's picture

This. If giving her 35 years of his life isn’t enough then good riddance. Let her deal with life after, and what she let go. I have a good buddy that went through a separation last year where he 100% bent over backwards to make it work. Now that he’s moved on and is happy with someone else, she’s the one miserable.