Me and a friend are currently experiencing something similar. For me, I see the amazing results and potential that steroids give me. I feel super human most of the time. This is sort of making the "normal" world seem less and less appealing. I wan't to be surrounded by more things that make me feel super human but instead, the normal people of this world and the normal parts of every day life seem to bring me down. I'm more focused on the negative of what in this world. I feel like an outsider sometimes who's always looking for "more". I guess we all just need to lighten up and enjoy the simple things in life. Life first, steroids second.

Aggression and self-fixation. Like a horse with blinders that can no longer see the beauty and the wonder of the world that surrounds him. That's ok. Without creative blocks, free-flowing creativity would become mundane, taken for granted, and un-appreciated. The pendulum's swing.

Steroids have bro-sifically been proven to conquer the primeval part of the brain. Conquer, destroy and drool....ie....roid rage. And look at heavy hgh usage. Supraorbital Taurus grows thick and heavy like the neanderthal peoples. But those damn Buffed arms bro!

I notice while on cycle everyone drives like assholes! I want to equip my truck with missiles, oil slicks, and smoke screen! Like that old game spy hunter...remember that fuggin shit!!??

People tell me all the time I'm not my old funny self. I'm all serious and to the point.

Sarcasm is the best I can seem to squeeze out these days, and that's not even funny. Ill reread something that made me chuckle and think "I'm a fucking idiot for writing that".

I wondered what was up with you these days because I noticed such a shift in personality. Oh well - get huge and then you can be funny again.

At least you went from funny to not funny and I went from not funny to even worse.

Yeah, Ed. I see what you are saying and I can concur with the "numbness" I experience while on cycle. It's almost like a cloudiness in my head at times. I honestly think some of it is the enhanced sense of well being and intensity you feel while on cycle. Anytime you feel like that it has to kind of affect you in a way. Maybe all that intensity tends to numb the underlying emotions you are really feeling making life seem more boring or maybe just not interesting enough to want to think hard enough to "win an argument" or "write a book". But I also notice to me it isn't an all the time feeling. I have my moments when I feel like superman and everything is enhanced like I am in the Matrix or something and everything seems easy and makes sense! lol! but seriously there are other times when I feel dumb and numb to everything. But you know what always makes me feel better? I can take my dumb ass in front of a mirror and strike a couple poses (especially after a good pump) and say "I may be dumb, but I'm a bad mofo" lmao! who cares Ed?? Go look in the mirror and flex the bi's for a while! You'll feel better!!!

On my way to the hospital now when my dad gets here. in absolute extreme pain. Maybe my last post on eroids. Before I go I want to tell ed you are an asset to this brotherhood. Me and you have never spoken but as I rock from left to right trying to alleviate the agony I think about you and your intelligence, never homo. Real homo anyway peace my friends