Soccer? WTF
I've got a little boy that is 5 years old. Since conception, I have, on a daily basis drilled the sport of wrestling into his head. As a baby, he was attending wrestling matches, chilling in the wrestling room taking it all in, watching videos, etc. I have a wrestling room in my house that in the evenings he and I practice. This past year was his first year in competetive wrestling and he absolutely loved it. He just couldn't get enough as he finished his first season undeafeated. Admittedly, I taught him how to win using moves that capitalized on the weak necks of children his age, and some concealed small joint manipulation. I'm sorry, but that is all part of the Ed wrestling program. It worked, so if you don't like that you can lick my balls.
At any rate this is what happened; to my dissapointment and without my knowlege, my wife signed my kid up for a girls sport.. That's right, soccer. She breaks the news to me last night. I'm like WTF woman? What are you doing to my boy? She explains, all while showing some cleavage and talking sexy, so of course, I'm a sucker and I go along with it. Well, this morning I get a call from my little boy. He's all excited as he has returned from his first practice, tells me about his jersey, and how fun soccer is. In my heart, I want to yell at the boy, but because of my love for this little man, I pretend to be excited. After a few minutes of listening to the excitement, I tell him that I love him and hang up the phone. I bury my head into my hands and want to cry, but the masculinity in me hasn't allowed that since 1982.
What the hell am I supposed to do? Soccer? Can there be a gayer sport than soccer? (Not that there is anything wrong with that.)
I love my little boy and want him to be happy so I'm sure tonight, on my way home from work...I guess I'll have to stop by the sporting goods store and buy a damn soccer ball. Sonofa bitch. How fricken embarassing is that? I'd rather be purchasing something more masculine, like an economy pack of tampons.
All my love No Homo,
Ed
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Oh soccer, thats a pussy sport. Sorry for your unfortunate situation. My five year old daughter is playing hockey! I planted and nutured that seed, since her conception. Needless to say she'll be able to kick your son's ass, JK.
Lol. Of course she will be able to kick my sons ass. He'd never dare hit her. Lol.
Nice work.
Anonhttp://www.mtv.com/videos/misc/728164/3-reasons-to-cheer-for-the-philade...
just be thankful hes not signing up for ball room dancing
What's wrong with Ballroom dancing?
nothing at all..especially not the cool costumes.
Lol. I knew this cycle turned you gay!
No homo!
lol
Tbh i've known some really tough lads that have played " Soccer", Vinnie Jones is a decent example. It can actually be a physical game at the lower levels but of course all you guys see is the very top teams in the world full of technical skillfull players who aren't physical and they dive around like morons.
I'd challenge anyone on here to play a Sunday League game and once youve nearly had your leg broken in the first 10 minutes you may rethink the stance a bit.
That said you can't force your son to love wrestling, he'll pick up something he genuinely finds interesting to him and what his friends play. No doubt through the years he's going to chop and change different sports, just be happy for him.
AnonHave you ever played football without a helmet or pads?
I realize that I could never force my son into loving wrestling. However, I feel that I'm smart enough to manipulate him into loving wrestling. Lol. I take him to a lot of the local events, we watch it on tv. We practice in my wrestling room at home, and when he gets in trouble, I tell him that I'm won't let him practice wrestling that day. Seriously, that hurts him more than a spanking. I never put pressure on him, If he loses, I hug him and tell him good job.
If he wanted to play soccer....Sure, I'd support the hell out of that. But I'm thinking his love for wrestling will always trump soccer. It's in his DNA
Here is a little somethin' somethin'
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVCegcfWXp8
What makes soccer a "gay" sport?
Lol, it's just a bunch of dudes that can't handle a win or a loss by themselves prancing around kicking a ball, acting injured by a slight bump,
They can't handle the physical beatings thy come with real sports like American football,Ice hockey, or rugby, so the opt for a kinder girlies sport.
It's better to have wrestled and lost than to have ever played soccer.
Slight bumps like on this video? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JW9EIHBapQ
However, I do have to hand it to you. That was a cool video. Might have even earned a little respect for the sport.
No. Like this video. Lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ppt7NdIj_yg
AnonED, as soon as this thread dies down can we talk about the hot ass Chics wearing very little clothing in the Lingerie Football League? Jeez those are some hot babes that can put a man on their ass!
Hell yes we can.
Lingerie football league is stil more manly than soccer.
Anon<snd=highfive!>
The problem with soccer is the way the pros play. Flop, flop, whine....etc...it is unwatchable. When my kid plays it is fierce out there. There are kids getting knocked on their ass left and right, getting kicked, elbows. ..It can be a tough sport depending on how you choose to play. It is great cardiovascular conditioning, and great for developing foot coordination and balance.
I am not a fan of soccer, but your son will enjoy it....be supportive.
I can respect Rugby. That's mans version of the woman's sport soccer.
Anon"soccer is the worlds most popular sport"
I didn't know what.
Yes, it is the only sport played on all continents, except Antarctica, for obvious reasons. The most talent comes out of Europe and South America.
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_most_popular_sport_in_the_world
When I was in high school I wrestled with a lot of guys that were also on the soccer team. Many of them were more conditioned than those of us that played football, plus they weren't as banged up. You have to remember, soccer is the worlds most popular sport, so if your son is good at it, it could possibly be an occupation for him, if he goes pro.
True dat on football. I hated starting wrestling season in high school after a season of getting piss pounded in football.
As far as him going pro in soccer... He would never embarass me by doing something like that.
Watch the next World Cup, most of those dude are millionaires, representing their countries. I bet on it every 4 years, and fill out a bracket.
breakingfaceYou're a bit fixated on masculinity vs femininity. At age 5 your goals for your son should be a fun and a positive experience with sports.
Lol. I think it's probably a safe bet to say that all of us men in this community are a bit fixated with masculinity. :). Nothing promotes masculinity like testosterone. As far as having fun, believe me. At his age, I know the importance of keeping it fun and low pressure.
Lmao! Damn Ed I thought Goth was good at pulling people in!!:P
Anonhttp://www.blurtit.com/q211320.html
Guys had to do something before soccer balls or footballs were invented.
Hell yeah.
I played club soccer for 12 years but dont worry Ed.... im not offended ;)
Yes pro soccer/EPL has devolved into trite flopping fests.
But you're saying two guys wearing girly tights rolling around on the ground grabbing each other is your idea of manly? Not to mention its so boring and unwatchable wasnt it deleted from the Olympics in favor of synchronized diving? Don't worry soccer is a "gateway sport" kids will love at 5 because most 5 year-olds love most to chase a ball but 75% of kids will quit soccer all together by age 12 to move on to other sports when the soccer involves work/practice to execute the game.
Lol. So you are saying two dudes in tight getting all sweaty grabbing each other is homo? Come on! It's only homo if you have a boner when you do it. :).
Thanks for playing.
Ha ha. Soccer is def more hetero bro. Just look at the soccer babes. Ronaldinho looks like a farm animal but google his wife Janaína- she is spectacular. Watch a few minutes of the WC or Olympics when Sweden or Brazil is playing when they show the crowd. You won't be disappointed!
AnonI sympathize with you bro. As soon as I finished reading it I teared up and punched myself in the face as hard as I could. The government is jacking with our drinking water I just know it.
That's no shit. That's why I only drink diet sodA.
soccer used to be a badass sport. People got hit, people got fucked up, people broke their shins in half! NOw, with commercialism and sponsorship its all about how good does the guy look in an underwear ad, and how can we make the most money out of endorsements and not get this guy any play time thats gonna hurt him. FUCK THAT. When i playd soccer (i was good and it was a sport for men) the coaches decided after seeing my ridiculous temper and inability to understand the definition of "friendly competition" that i would be a great enforcer. If a player on the other team was playing too rough and taking cheap shots i was sent in to get my final card, usually a red. One time the ball went up, this little napolean piece of shit saw it too, we both went for it... well he went for it, i grabbed the front of his jersey and climbed up the front of his body with my cleats and jumped higher than i had ever before. Yes i headed the ball but thats not the point. I smashed his face with my cleats. It takes real skill to control the ball without your hands. It takes skill to run that much. It s sport because you can bash a motherfucker for getting in your way.
Its too bad they did away with all the hitting and now if you watch pro soccer, if a guy gets too close the other guy literally falls down and grabs his (leg/foot/arm/mouth/penis) and pretends to be dead for a minute. FUCKING PUSSIES. Its all an act now.
As much as i loved that sprt (because it WAS a sport when i played) i have to agree with Kip.
I knew there was something that I like about emerald. Lol. No homo
Damn!!! And I thought Ed was upset over this shit!:P
also, david beckham is a bitch
im a soccer fan, to be honest id rather watch soccer over football. i bet this gets a few banana hammocks twisted. my biggest passions are combat sports though. soccer is a real sport, try playing it, its not as easy as it looks.
I agree, soccer is a sport, a girls sport.
Lmao! Just read this for the first time. Nothing worse to a wrestling legacy then to be sucker punched with the betrayal of converting the children to another sport ! After reading this when I get home I am going to punch my wife in the mouth just in case she was thinking about leading our son astray!
That's the spirit. If you can stop this evil before it starts the better off your boy will be.
Well I believe Hilary Clinton said it best " It takes a village to raise a child and one soccer mom to rob its sons of their manhood"!
Lmao!
I think Lee Labrada was a soccer player at one time..
just a thought.
I'm sure he's ashamed of it.
Anyone see that south park about wrestling?