The gym is my xanax I put in my ear buds, zone out and go to work getting out all my stress from the day. I would not want my wife coming with me alot of time she is the one that creates the most stress on me and the one i need a break from so taking her there with me would be defeating the whole purpose.

Send her over to the cardio area of the gym and tell her to run for ten miles -while you do
your thing on the other side.. used to work for me.. also tell her that you need a min of two hours
and hold on the keys or you might need a ride home...and bring her own bag and water,etc..

im divorced.. thank-g-d.

each one has the style that suits him best, if this makes you feel uncomfortable, change it and have a chit chat

My wife avoids doing this, she's smart ;)

Ok I am gonna be real here!!! I have no choice but to work out with my man lol!!! Don't get me wrong I love training with him,BUT he talks to me like one of the his homies...Loudly!! and it's funny!! (to us)..But when I want to do my thing for a bit like Cardio or whatever on my own it's the end of the world. It's the perfect love hate relationship.. But I wouldn't have it any other way ;)

I tried this before and it was a joke! Here is how it went: She fixed her hair, She complained, She was uncomfortable sweating, She watched the clock, She came up with reasons to leave, She wanted to leave so she offered some hot work out sex, (That was the only cool part) she talked to her friends, she talked to people I tried to ignore, she asked why I lifted so much heavy weight, she asked about the upcoming weekend (It was Tuesday) she looked in the mirror A LOT, She wore ridiculous clothes and make up, She did not take advice well, she got mad when I told her she was doing everything wrong or with bad form. She had to bring her water, keys, phone, lip gloss, magazine, GPS etc... Did I mention the whining and looking in the mirror? She is no longer my gym buddy

Have some patience man. My girl is the same but I can't get upset about it, she's not a bodybuilder and I ain't trying to turn her into one....she shouldn't lift with you, maybe do warm ups together or cardio? But leave lifting to the big boys and big girls. Its like going to a jazzercise class with a girl and she gets super pissed cuz ur asking dumb question and not doing it right so she storms out cuz ur such a bumblin dum dum. Feel me? itried lifting with my girl but its totally different cuz her goals are different.

Yeah, it almost sounds as though you and her might have different goals. If she is happy being a cradio bunny, but has trouble getting through a set, it might be because she really doesn't want to be lifting.

I have had a few ex's that I got into lifting, most of the time I would set up a plan for them, go over each exercise with them and then send them on their way, all the while keeping an eye to make sure they weren't having any trouble (and that nobody else was making a move on her).
That way you can do your thing and she can do hers. If she learns to like it, GREAT. If not, it's still good she does cardio.

I don't have trouble. We don't get to the gym together much anymore but when we do, we both have tunnel vision. She's focused on her shit and me on mine. I usually have to drag her outta there. She may be more intense than me!

I agree with Grrrls post here,there has to be a single mindedness about specific goals.. ive been training since i was 17yrs old and had numorous training partners over the years and believe me in the early days i used to hook up with the biggest gnarliest bastards in the gym thinking if i train the same as them i would force my body to get fkn massive.. it works to a point! but the horrendous injuries and setbacks come hand in hand with over stressing the body.. this is were time and
patience come onboard to ultimately find out what works best for each of us,we can all follow someones training or eating plan and get zero results or magic results depending on our bodies respond to such,finding our own specific "groove" was/is the fun part for me.. saying that i train and eat differently to most prescribed methods and have learned to keep a balance of density/strength/bodyfat/vascularity which i can now hold year in year out with just a fine tune to get properly shredded/striated before a competition.
Anyway back on topic .. me and suze have been training together for the last 3yrs doing exactly the same routines on a 4 day w/out plan.. clearly the poundages are different but other than that the intensity remains the same (ultra hardcore) and we motivate and drive eachother just the same way as in the old days working with the gym monsters.. luckily suze has been bitten hard by the competition bug and her focus is through the fkn roof lol... even on days were i could easily drag my old ass i am never allowed!.. never is a w/out missed or cut short for ANY reason and the conversations and chat at home is about nothing but nutrition and bodybuilding!... you may ask are we addicted/possessed by our obsession to train and compete... the answer to ALL these questions my brother is a BIG FAT YES!.. nothing on earth interests us more and the fire in the gut for constant progression burns strong... what more can i say here bodybuiling is my life and passion,take it away from me and i would be a broken man and may as well crawl into a corner huddle up and fkn die.
+3 good post i enjoyed activating my brain for awhile then lol...lol

I have to agree! I don't like being around if the hubby is hitting hard!! I feel like I'm in the way of his focus! I do my girly exercises and meet up later! He enjoys helping me but I know when to keep a distance and not be a distraction! We enjoy walking and cardio together! So make time for your lifts and plan a workout that can benefit u both!

wow. I am just amazed at the responses.. Goth and I train together and quite honestly I m not allowed to talk to him for at least a half hour before we get to the gym.. when we get there we are all business shit I've got some arms to grow .. I can't even relate to what you are saying. We have our expectations and goals and they keep us on the same level and intensity .. maybe that is where the difference comes in for us. We both love what we are doing and have similar goals and objectives. Sweating, soreness, and sometimes pain are the things we work through to get where we want to be. Maybe your partner doesn't have the right mindset and or goals ??

My advise after 23 years of marrage is that we all need our alone time with our passion. Sometimes when you add into that it takes away from that much needed space. Just have to let her know that it isn't a personal reflection on her. And that you didn't realize your need to go it alone in order to enjoy your family more when spending time with them. Just my .02. Good luck.

It can work! It was tough with different goals, we used to go in together then go our separate ways and only helped each other when needed. Now with the EBC we both have the same goals and same diet. So its working well. But Mrs.Fit is dedicated, maybe that's the difference. In the beginning though (last year), I would just use the anger in my lifts! LOL ;-P
Besides loading and unloading the bar is an extra workout!

let her do her thing and you do your thing bro. sounds like you are like me, i can't even stand having a workout partner. i get a better workout by myself than i do with others

HELL NOOOOO!!! That's your time alone, Man or Woman you need a break from your other half. The gym is not the place for couples save that for after the gym go get a couples massage.

I want to give it a try just to try educate her and try an ignite a passion for insane workouts that I have but for her. I want to get her looking like DLB (although she is a girlfriend not a spouse)
I can see where it would be good to separate it though and get alone time. The gym is my sanctuary and I assume it is for many on eroids, so I want to keep it sacred.