+ 1 Who would win in a fight?
Ok kids, this is part 1 in a series of match ups, so if you didn't get matched up don't feel bad you may make round 2. If you would like to be in my second round of matchups, pm me and if I think you can hang I'll put you on the next card.
Now.... LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!
One of my favorite things to do is match up people in an imaginary no holds barred cage fight. Yes head butts are allowed. This is your chance to weigh in. Who do you think would win in a cage fight and why?
Fight 1: (ladies) Suzy B. vs. Hrdbodygrrrrll
Fight 2: (sources) Big D. Vs. Perses
Fight 3 : (main event) Tread M Vs. Viking
Winner will be decided by the opinion of the majority. In the event of a tie I will make the final decision. If one of the fighters bows out due to a bad case of pussitis an alternate fighter will be brought in. I'd be willing to bet that we won't see pussitis in this matchup.
Thanks for playing.
Ed
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Fight Results:
Fight 1: Suzy B Vs. Grrrl
Grrrrl Enters the arena to the pounding chords of "One" by Mettallica. Wearing a Black robe we can hear:
"I can't remember anything
Can't tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside I feel the scream!
This terrible silence stops it there"
The arena erupts with cheers and boo's. One heckler says something as she walks down the pipe only to be piss pounded by Grrls hard Left.
Suzy enters the ring wearing a red lacy robe to the upbeat lyrics of Whitney Houston's I will always love you... She hands out flowers and candy to the little kids in the crowd. The crowd cheers. Some men break into tears.
Round 1:
As they center up in the ring the referee Big John McCarthy yells:"Lets Get it on!"
Suzy goes to touch gloves only to catch a hard kick to the stomach. Off in the distance a kitten can be heard dying.
Suzy closes the distance on the larger grrrl catching her in a double leg bringing her to the ground. Girrl pulls her into her guard and starts throwing elbows into Suzy's head. Relentless and unphased Suzy passes Grrls guard and starts unleashing hell. Suzy's tirelessy lands punch after punch to Grrrllls face and Jaw. All of a sudden in unison the crowd starts chanting Girl! Girl! Girl! Girl starts to shake Hulk Hogan style, Suzy has a worried look on her face. Girl, bloodied, grabs Suzy's arm and with amazing flexability works Suzy into a triangle Choke. Suzy's face reddens as Grrrl pulls her head tighter towards her magical area. Ding Ding. Suzy is saved by the bell.
Round 2:
The girls circle. Suzy a little dazed, Grrrl bloodied and cut from some serious ground an pound. Suzy lands a hard kick to the jaw of Grrrl it doesn't phase Grrrl Grrrl lands a hard right that crushes Suzy's nose. Blood flowing everywhere. But this doesn't phase Suzy. She uses her hand to block one nostral and blows snot and blood all over Grrrlll. Girl reaches into her bikini top and pulls out a switch blade.
Shit just got serious. Grrrrl Swipes at Suzy making a slight cut across Suzy's shoulder. Suzy licks off the blood. Suzy closes the distance as girl lunges with the knife. The knife stops at Suzy's rock hard abs. Grlll Drops the knife and ties up with Suzy. Suzy bites grrrl on the neck. Something happens and Girrl bites Suzy on the neck. Wait! What is happening! They both all of a sudden start making out! Both fighters have stopped fighting.. It looks like it's going to be a draw! Grrrl slides behind Suzy seductively to undo Suzy's top... Wait... Girl just locked Suzy into a rear naked Choke! Oh No! What a dirty trick! Things start to fade to black for Suzy and it's over. Grrrll Just won the fight by rear naked choke!
Lmfao! i lived every moment .... not too sure bout living with my babe now she sports a broken snout hahahah
So here are my final picks. 1) Hrdbdygrrl over suzy b cause grrl was seriously pissed about suzy's comments on TMZ 2) Perses over BigD cause Perses has some of my $. 3) Viking over Tread M cause tread wont be able stop giggling, feeling oh so pretty in his new pink mankini...
tread-mWell and let's face it, I didn't realize it was mud wrestling which V is a champion at from his wet t-shirt days back at the clubs. Tell you what , I've seen some pics of when his gyno was flared back in the day, even a few where he was lactating from no caber running 19's, I see how he got all those trophies! I'd damn sure spring for a few singles!
Yep thats what i say! if you cant get big pecs go get some BIG GYNO lmao! keep your knees warm in winter.
CleyonThat must be some aggressive gyno!
Thought i better show my face in here before i get beaten up or break my nails :(
Atta girl. Showing up fashionably late to kick some Grrrll keyster!
How do you feel coming into the fight?
TMZ has spotted Suzy B. leavin the gym. She's asked what we can expect to see in the big fight on tues. She is very short for words but Suzy says we can expect to see a great fight, and Hrdbodygrrrll will be a limp body grrrl when She knocks her ass out!! potent words but she does has the means to back it up... More Later folks.
FYI i just seen tread at the mall buying a big pink velvet mankini... just after having his silverback waxed lmao!
Just imagined waxs strips with Treads grey back hair attached. Lol.
tread-mI saved those and one of my groin strips for you brother, vike wanted the other groin strip to boil into his V juice this next batch along with a nut strip, should be some pretty high end mocus!
New batch is just coming off the stove bro! i wanted a twist with this new brew so i went down the local swimming pool after the school girls had done there morning swimming session and scooped up all the pubes out the filters... took a fair while to boil that shit down to add to the new Vjuice after filtering out all the gusset fluff and used tampon the shit looks pretty clear.. a little like pond water and piss! but hey its good enough for us! i pinned some earlier the pip is f-ing horrendous just like having a hot poker shoved up your ass but thats just the way i like it... after a couple hours the heavenly smell of minge started erupting from the pores and dogs have started to follow me in huge packs!! next brew should be even more potent i plan to call into the local old folks home to see what i can scrape out the U bends for an even more aromatic brew and maybe do an oral version to fully appreciate the flavors.
tread-mHoly shit, I just thought of a new bi-product we could market brother in addition to the juice...Vikes pube juice candles? Would need the Suze to help us with a more catchy name of course since pube juice candles would be hard to move, but still. Hell we need our own thread looking for names for this stuff, could do it like America's next top model. Women could chime in with their choice name for the candles and then send naked pics. We would mostly judge the naked pics but would have to put some attention on their name entries too. Damn, this things finally coming together brother, we're gonna be RockStars!!!
Oh yeah! always wanted to be a rockstar brother i used to pose to van halens"poundcake" always fancied myself as david lee roth or sammy hagar! thinking we should put a wet wipe in with the candles bro then the ladies can reuse them puppies? they will have to be extra heavy duty some of our juicing ladies would wear them things out like an HB pencil in an electric sharpener.We would have to have a no return policy on the naked pics bro with your PRE EJAC problems them things are gonna get hellish stickie lmao! Hell remember the other day in walmart the 62yr old cashier only smiled at you then that awesome rumbling sound erurted from your loins and next thing she looked like somebody threw 50lb of rice pudding over her lol i know she thankyou darlin but thats not the point here! lmfao!
Yeah, I kind of picture you as Sammy Hagar from the "I can't drive 55" Video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvV3nn_de2k
Hey thats me bro yellow flameproofs an all... ferraris and chicks i could cope with some of that bro!
Yeah, the only problem with the I cant drive video is there isnt a single hot chick in it. And it gets a little homoerotic during the arrest scene. But hey it was the 80's. We cant fault them for that.
I picture Tread as Eddie Van Halen from the "jump" video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlq0lYB3iSM
Eddie does some badass kicks and splits in that video. LMAO
tread-mBrother I'll find the link somewhere, Texas jam 86 I believe, its on youtube, 86,000 people in the cotton bowl Dallas Tx I'm on the filed right up by the stage watching Eddie and Sammy rock that ass off! 13 hrs of "who the F am I" and hard rockin! Eddie was still married to Valerie Bertinelli at that time and brought her out on stage. I try to find myself in the video and can't but there was a period during the day I was out like a light on bath salts so I may actually bhe on the ground during the vid. The after party I won't describe here was Rockstar freak show as well and there aRe things that happend that therapy is still working to dig out, stuff I don't wanna know brother but my therapist thinks it will help, she's hot as hell so I just do what she says....naked on the couch, well, ok if its going to help me...ummm, sure you can lay on me, is this what we call "deep therapy" because I feel as though we're making "headway" I really do! Why do they call you a head shrink btw, should be a head swell...well, whatever works.
CleyonDid you go to the free concert VH threw in the Dallas West End in 1991? That was a great night! Me and all my friends were there, solidified my love for them. After that I even forgave them for booting Dave, and hiring Sammy.
I hear ya brother. I once fell asleep backstage at a Ricky Martin after party and shit. I still can't talk about it.
tread-mAhhhh, the memories, I nick named her tapioca, she really seems to like me brother! Lol. Yeah I'm working on an idea now, the triple wick pubinator! BOOM!
Yeah bro she had a soft spot for you! after a good scrub down with a yard brush and a little disinfectant around the flange maybe you would get a good ride for maybe 10 mins before she popped her clogs! you must remember bro these old girls aint ready for your jungle beast sexual antics! you at least need to talk to them first instead of going straight in with full inpregnation1 ohhh also you need to curb the howling it upsets the children lmao!
tread-mDamn kids always whining about something! I'm hungry , I'm thirsty, he howls to loud! Yeah brother I think I may have to take her to see Dirk Diggler in boggie nights so she kinda gets the scen you know, at her age she still thinks the lights being on is considered kinky...oh girl, now we have light shows!
Lmao! watch that pacemaker going through the security doors bro! dont want to blow your cover haha
tread-mNo the only questions TSA ever ask is "why the hell would you have a pacemaker in your scritum brother" and Ik; like, look at that monster lady, something has to control it!!! Lmaooo...stay thirsty baby doll
Ha so thats the reason my kitchen smells so bad :( you cant blame that on egg trumps lol
It's been said that some aboriginal tribes in Australia actually worship tread pubes.
tread-mThat's mainly Austalian women but yes, the tribes have taken to the tradition as well. Its a cross I bare my friend, a cross I bare.
CleyonSome say that his pit sweat has medicinal qualities and everytime her farts a rainbow dies. All we know is he's called Tread!
tread-mSasquatch took a picture of him...stay thirsty
CleyonYou don't watch Top Gear do you?...
Ding ding ...
grrl takes her late in the 3rd round ko. It was an amazing match-up. I was hoping the tops would pop off at some point, but No, they just beat the shit outta each other... The ko blow was a flying judo kick to the head.
Perses takes em in a 2nd round by tap out. It was outstanding! They were fightin blow for blow and Big D knocked Perses off balance and D twisted him up in a Triangle but perses some how broke free and grabbed D in a choke hold... Once those biceps are on ya there is No breathing!
Tread takes him at the very beginning of the 3rd rd... K.O. The two were fighting toe to toe in the first two rounds both fighting a conservative fight. Kind of boring really, then at the beginning of the third the whole crowd was silent and a shrill cry came from the front row... It was a blonde bombshell with her top up over head... Viking was like a deer in head lights w/ his tongue out. She did have beautiful tits. Tread capitalized on the situation and picks viking up into a helicopter spin from tornado alley. Then tread threw him to the ground head first and comes down w/ a two hand overhead tomahak smash to the nose and it's over...
After party at my place! Open bar, Pool table, Pool, Hot tub, and it's catered by Gordan Ramsay all you can eat!
That was pretty awesome. Thanks for playing.
No, No, No... sorry folks none of the above is true... That didn't happen! It was all a sham. Obviously a publicity stunt folks!!
When is the day of reckoning Ed?
Fights are scheduled for Tuesday.
Tuesday it shall be then... When the fights are over, You are coming to the party right? Sponsered by heineken and 911 Leather bondage shop. Heineken is sending a truck weighted down w/ kegs and a huge full bar... 911LBS,has agreed to donate studded collars, liquid latex, and rasberry jelly for door prizes. I have two sororities coming and the cast/crew from girls gone wild will be here to film at the fights and party.
I don't know brotha, the bondage parties kind of scare me, I'm a claustrophobic. I would need some sort of assurance that the chick to stud ratio is at least 4:1.
You are actually in good fortune my friend. The 911 are all tied up tuesday an oversight on there part by double booking. I was able to get Hawaiian Tropic to fill in as sponser, and The Hawaiian Tropic beauty pageant will be sending a bus. I am having try outs this evening for ring girls to strut their stuff in between rounds. Being the Red Blooded American I am, I'll be accepting bribes from the girls all night long
You should invite at least one fat chick for Cleyon.
CleyonWe can put you in a dress, and that would help the ratio. (no homo)
sounds a lil homo to me if all it takes is a dress to change the ratio?:) I prefer the taco to the sausage.
If I was a bad person I would have written:
"I can just wear the dress that your momma left at my house. It might be a little big though."
CleyonI'm glad you aren't a bad person! LOL! I thought Tread said you liked to play dressup?
Damn Tread told me he wouldn't say anything... Besides it was a sheep outfit not a fricken dress.
CleyonYep, sounds about right. Tread and his sheep... What really worried me is when I saw that he had a "gorilla in a tutu" costume in his closet.
shoxingbiceps17this is a perfect way to start drama...(SMH)
Welcome to The Eroids Octagon
FYI, Suzy B Has a reputable martial arts background.