NPP - Paranoix Anxiety
So not sure Im going to make it through my NPP cycle. 4 weeks in and I like it however the paranoia and anxiety is getting to me. Can't sleep at night. Get insane thoughts in my head and just can't get rid of them and I consider myself to be a pretty mentally strong person. I just can't kick it out. My wife really hasn't done anything.
Prob didn't help the DAY i started NPP my wife goes out with my step daughter and she is suppose to be out for 2-3 hours and 6 hours later she isn't found, I find her car abanded at 3am in the morning at the restaraunt she was suppose to be at, I put a police missing persons out cause i haven't heard form her or my step daughter, ends up drunk in another county, took an Uber45 min away, hanging out with her daughter and her boyfriend and friends, didn't text me at all to say where she was. Was a fun night let me tell you. Totally unlike her but that was a seed planted I suppose for the dark side of 19-nors.
Then she went out again teh next weekend ofcourse the paranoia starts kicking in was suppose to be out a coupel hours and she was running late. She was with my step sons wife. Didn't matter. In my head she was doing something sketchy.
Then went out again the 3rd weekend and the paranoia is really kicking in. Like why you like them more then me and our family. (given I know its her daughter she is with and her boyfriend and his friends) Im like your fucking those other guys out there. Im like thats the only reason you woudl want to hang out with 25 year olds at a bar restaraunt. When in reality she just wants to hang out with her daughter. Redonk thoughts normally but seem so real and possible.
Then the thoughts about her instagram start and she is banging everyone on there showing off her goodies to everyone (atleast in my head) Sure the guy that messaged her lives in England but doesn't matter to me. I know she has a plane ticket ready for him and banging him when he gets off the plane in the bathroom when she really says she is at work. Gotta be. Seems real and plausable.
Then its been like 15 years since she had breast implants. She is liek i need to get my breasts redone. Im like yea so you can show em off to all the boys on instagram. The dudes with fast cars and big cocks. I know it. I know it>
So yea the jealousy, paranoia, etc is really getting to me. nOrmally I don't care if she goes out. I have no issue with it. I do like to go out sometimes with her but usually stuck with kids at home.
My options:
1. Trying to get through another 4 weeks of NPP for an 8 week cycle,
2. Dropping the NPP to very low dose for Joint releif (which I do like) or
3. Completly dropping it all together and just running a straight Sust Cycle for the remaining 8 weeks.
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Bump- Any updates @Thelcon ?
@Drexyl Last two shots have taken 20mg EOD. Things are def better. Before even running this cycle the wife and I discussed side effects. So she was understanding of my issues. Overall I think it was just a perfect storm of her doing some things she never has in 10 years along with the NPP just making it seem 10x worse than it really was. We had a good discussion and all is well on the homefront.
So for now keeping the NPP at a joint health dosage.
And yes the wife and I got to go out with everyone and enjoy an evening with some drinks. All is on the up and up.
Now looking into HGH muahahahha
Happy to hear this, that’s great news!!
Oh and with the hgh, if it’s in the budget I suggest using it. Especially if your goal is to get as big as possible, i think it can definitely add thickness in places and in ways that you can’t seem to get from training alone
Just ordered 2 kits from a popular source at the moment. Included my IGF-1 test with my blood test next week to see baseline.
There ya go my friend, I’m glad things got better for you, and you learned tolerance levels. I’m happy things didn’t go south. Although it sent me down a rabbit hole of wife sharing porn lol
Are you running any dht? My last run of test/npp had mast sprinkled in at around 200-300mg/wk. I and a few others use dht or mast in general to help keep off the anxiety/paranoia sides of 19nors. Some people say it works, others dont. For me, it seemed to work out well. When I tried again without mast, things were not in my favor side wise.
Food for thought! Good luck bro
Get your ducks in a row before running it again or continuing the cycle. It's nightmare wondering if it's reality or a compound you're putting in your body, revisit it at a later date. Are gains worth worsening a troubled relationship or even worse a troubled relationship that's one sided ??
19nors raise prolactin. You can always do bloodwork to see what’s wrong, but caber would probably help you out if your prolactin is too high which it seems like it probably is.
Bloodwork is your friend. Figure out your issue and try and resolve it.
Hey bro I have had that paranoia before and I came off all compounds until everything at home got back on track. I believe it could be the hormones but most of all the unstable things that were going on for me at home. Good luck and god bless you brother. It’s not worth having a break down or even worse happening to you.
This. When life is just unmanageable the harder we work to control it the faster it becomes out of control
anvilWell said my guy
Yep you’re right. There were a couple times when I was living alone and would get panic attacks at night thinking that I may have took much tren and then I would make it worse by thinking about it .walked the block for hours trying to shake the anxiety.
Haha. Damn bruh how much tren did you take. I remember once I injected 3ml of tren e 250 a week later I had veins all over my forehead
It was like 3 amps of parabolin per week. I made it about four weeks and stopped. I get anxiety easy. I used to love running tren when I was younger I could tolerate it, not so much now
Same buddy
Thanks bro
Just stop the NPP if that’s what you think is causing it.
Ohh shit have our plans already been found out??!! Lmao
Seriously though mate, I don't think its so much to do with running NPP and more to do with a few occasions that were out of order on your wifes part - that have now got you particularly anxious and worried every time she is going out of the front door. She isn't exactly helping the situation by calming down a little by the sounds of it either. Only you know if you would normally feel this way without NPP in you, I suspect you would anyway and then throw some steroids on top of the mix and your mind is all over the place. I would stop using it for a while and see how you feel in a few weeks.
It has never happened to me
I've seen this happen before, one of my customers had a nervous breakdown from taking NPP, complete breakdown, lost his job, couldn't leave the house ,etc. Felt bad, tried to supplement him a bit on living costs because I had never seen anything like this before, even after stopping it continued. NPP and EQ can both cause insane anxiety which usually subsides after cessation.
EQ was one of my favorite compounds until I fucked around at too high a dosage and found out hard, never touched it again after. Drop the NPP completely, opt for low dose deca IF you really need it. Or just take up some glucosamine and joint sups. It ain't worth the mental health, there's other things out there that can help with the joints.
Good advice, with so many different available compounds out there it makes no sense to keep pushing something that’s messing with your head. That specific side effect is extremely individual specific but if you’re one of those guys that gets thrown off from nandrolone dump it and be done with it.
Oddly enough, I am not. I've never had anxiety issues in my life, didn't even know what a panic attack was before I had one from EQ. Was terrible to say the least
EQ is definitely an anxiety provoking compound, I have had some Dianabol that was similar to it in the early years where if you ran it high it would do the same thing, which is understandable when you think they are structurally similar to one another!
Easy e once said when he crashed his 64 Impala he left it in the gutter and went and got another. This is my view on women
Ok keep thinking that way...your ass will be needing a new wrist watch haha
I just threw mine out. Same shit wants to get drunk and drive around and party. Like Bitch your 37 years old you outgrew it and still trying to do it. I'm not with it no more @DeeMan
Good for you my man. I have zero tolerance for all that jack ass action. No sir! If I'm acting right well you better be doing the same or else I can't use you anyone...basically she'd be worthless to me and I'd dismiss her faster than she could walk out that door. The older you get the more you're suppose to realize your time is valuable. Yea at 37 gotta be a little more stabilized lol
He died in a car crash right?
Died of AIDS
Nah some down low bitch gave him the bug
I agree some chick. Nah I highly doubt dude was homo. Heard way too many stories of him with tons of women. I knew one woman personally that he messed with after his concert. She ended up sick too
I suspect our homeboy was a little on the silent O side of being a homey.
He was too hard in the 80s to be fully straight.
Cocaine is a hell of a drug
flashbacks
oddly relevant name
Doesn’t sound like you’re in a good situation. The Npp will only exacerbate whatever is within your subconscious which isn’t a trustworthy situation. I wish you all the best but I would advise, this situation isn’t what many would tolerate on here.
I gotta say the deca got me there, not npp. But it wasn’t paranoia with the deca, it was more so overly emotional. Like life insurance commercials would get me, sad movie scenes. Weird stuff like that. I just recognized it was the drug, accepted it for what it was, and made it fun.
Yeah bro, on Tren I went from wanting to skin people alive to crying historically when I see a baby in public. As far as relationships go, I’m more conservative and reserved. I’m not into drinking or doing drugs. If I go out, it’s to a cigar lounge or museum, car show art gallery, live band/jazz bar. There’s no side of me that desires attention or the single life so it’s to be reciprocated by the other party.
Man it really amazes me when I hear all these stories. Man juice can be a mofo on our mental state. This is real for those that still deny this known fact. Your ass will end up in jail, hurt or hurting someone before you know it. I'm pretty chill but damn I've even had my moments on our so called " weak dosages" @simonmagus84 so I couldn't even imagine Tren or huge doses of some hormone that would mess with my mind.
You know how they do it. They use psychiatric meds like benzos to counteract the psychotropic effects of Tren or they’ll claim they have “anxiety” or “depression” yet use meds that drastically impact mood. You’ll see statistically The basic AAS like test, GH and Var don’t impact mood to the extent 19nors or other heavy compounds do. I find it hypocritical when users make exceptions to use certain compounds just to look a certain way. Users should prioritize health mental and physical over all else but you and I both know this isn’t the case.
Really? I didn't know that they will use psychiatric drugs to counter tren effects...not good. Maybe I'm way off and wrong but I still think 19 nors, specifically tren permanently alters the brain somehow. Maybe a long term effect, who knows. I just always had that feeling.
And I agree the last thing some guys care about is the mental health part which is crazier than a mofo. I told you before you are definitely on the right track with the way you see things. I see it that same way. I'm not on here just saying these things just to say them lol. I 100% believe
@simonmagus84
It’s so much easier if people forgo the denial. Like, look, you’re on drugs. Testosterone, deca, tren, dbol, whatever, you’re throwing your body out of homeostasis and there’s going to be consequences, even personality wise. Once a person can accept that yes, steroids do have side effects and that’s what I’m going through right now, life becomes so much easier.
Absolutely. Facts
That’s called living the life. I went to a family cookout last weekend, tried to have beer to be sociable and it just tasted awful. My mother in law said “your scotch is still here from a couple years ago”, that was even worse. I just don’t like it anymore. Wasn’t ever a conscious decision to give up alcohol, it just started tasting bad and feeling even worse. Cigar lounge sounds like a winner, what’s the culture like with those?
Gotta be honest with you bro, it doesn’t matter if you drop the NPP or not, from what I just read, there is definitely something going on. An outside perspective with no emotional attachment to the situation, she’s not being honest with you which tells me she’s not being true to you. No man’s wife should be out partying with other guys, no matter if it’s with her daughter and daughter in law or anyone else for that matter.
Crazy situation for sure
Its not the NPP thats the problem its the alcohol thats her problem. Try to end it before her addiction drives her to jail or worse. Its already effecting her relationship and thats just the starter.
Npp is a problem for some guys and that most definitely can't be down played. And yea her drinking alot isn't helping the situation. So yes Icon npp can be an issue for some mentally.
@TheIcon you seem like a good family man, I know you're more than likely frustrated but keep your cool and drop the npp and see if that helps. Now her partying is another story but try best as you can to control what you can control.
Definitely, we all react to the drugs differently for sure. How ya been big D ? Busy myself, but finally have a free weekend, gonna take a new tool to the range I think. I just hope Thelcon really sits down with her and puts it all on the table. I mean, what if he’s right about his concerns? Like she’s going out after setting things up and it’s 2-3 guys in a hotel room taking turns in her? Getting fucked by one while she’s blowing the other 2? Then going home to him all used up? Shit happens, I’d hate to see the guy get hurt like that. Think she’s hot?