As a firm believer in the idea that you are who you are, I think that when you take gear, it magnifies whatever is already there or, for some of us, what’s hiding under the surface.

I’m okay with admitting that I like both guys and girls, and after a few years on this forum, I wanted to ask how gear affects people’s sexuality and emotional state. Hopefully, I won’t lose any street cred here.

For me, what I find interesting is that about 4 weeks into a cycle, my desires become really intense. For the most part, this is pretty fun for me. Sex is definitely more intense and energetic, but I notice my desire to be more sexually submissive or feminine shoots through the roof.

I’m not talking about wearing my girl’s clothing or anything, but I end up shaving everything as the gains start to come in and admiring my ass and legs, and I kind of get off when a guy looks at me in that way. I tend to like to feel attractive.

Also, I can be much more of a bitch in terms of my attitude towards the people around me. I tend to take things more personally when I get corrected at work, and sometimes I feel like the smallest person in the room. It’s that feeling you had as a kid when you did something awkward.

It’s really interesting to me because when I cycle off gear, a lot of those feelings kind of fade. Not to say I’m not bi, but my hypersexuality goes away, and I kind of go back to “normal.”

I’m pretty type A on or off gear, but I guess what I’m curious about is estrogen and how, when you take testosterone, it rises in step. Am I experiencing mental estrogen side effects, or am I just feeling more confident and leaning into what’s there? I would love to hear about some of your mental states and changes on and off cycle.