I see that I'm a lil late here and the op has disappeared since his post. Just my 2cent for the next reader. I also workout, grapple, aas, and 40+. Keep in mind ur tendon and ligament health. That much aggressive training will wear on u, and aas use cld dry them out. muscles recover quicker than the tendon/ligament especially at ur age now. Not mention the muscle pump during grappling limited my performance also.. be smart and healthy

Unpopular opinion i guess:

You admit to not be consistent for too long but you want to make up for it doing steroids.

First be consistent, see how it goes for a year or two at least, then if you really think you need it, maybe try some injectable assistance.

Not meaning to be a prick, but imho gear should be for who lift seriously. See how it goes without it first.

Your first cycle would be the same as we would recommend to any beginner which would be 250 to 500mg Test E per week split into 2 injections spaced evenly apart. You can then repeat this again for your second if you wish. I use to know someone who cycled who was very high level BJJ and the typical compounds he would use would be a selection from Test E/Cyp, Deca, E.Q and Anavar. The Deca would be used if he was bulking specifically then E.Q more endurance based but lean muscle at the same time. Basically anything at kinda up to 400 to 500mg/wk and nothing more as to make sure his BP and heart rate weren't getting high and his breathing to suffer when rolling. That means don't bother with things like Trenbolone, Dbol, Adrol, Superdrol etc. Keep things nice and light but enough to make a difference and not hinder cardio in any way

Welcome to Eroids !

https://www.eroids.com/forums/steroids-qa/steroid-cycles/how-to-run-a-cycle

Also, have you looked into TRT? Might be worth considering if you are interested. Plenty of info in the forums like the one I posted above. Wish ya well bro