posted Tue, 09/08/2015 - 18:57
3929
What do I do?
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Haven't been real active lately, but I've got some issues and don't have too many ppl out here in my life to talk to about them, so....
What do you guys think I should do if I feel like my significant other is lying to me on a semi regular basis. A lot of the times its dumb stuff that doesn't even matter, but sometimes it really is important stuff. I love the girl but idk what to do anymore.
Any suggestions?
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the base of a relationship is trust and being honest with one another. Atleast for me. If my gf was lied to me and I found out, let alone it happening on a semi regular basis I wouldn't be able to believe anything she said. If I stuck around it would drive me crazy. For example today she's gonna work a soccer game for the school she teaches at to get some comp time, but in my mind I would be thinking what is she really doing? Is she really there? Or is she lying to me and off with someone else. Anytime shes late I would be wondering wtf she's doing. That's what it would do to me if gf was lying to me.
This is a tough one man, I know you love her and if I was in this position it would be really hard for me. But if my gf was lying to me about important shit I think I would have to leave. It would fuck with my head and make me go crazy if I stayed. Way to much unnecessary stress and I don't need that in my life with all the other things going on. That's the one person you have who you should be able to fully trust, and if you can't idk if you can really be happy. Atleast to me.
FR sent bro...
First, I agree with Irish Mack and what he said. Second,how long has her change in behavior been going on? Third, are u married and is the baby yours? Fourth, what negative info does she have on you? Are yall the same age? Are there any other children involved?
https://youtu.be/nQjeAfIGOPo?t=21m46s
are they white lies to prevent an argument? or lies about where she is and whos shes seeing?
any guy friends?
if she does, get a claw hammer, wrap it in glad wrap, put on some old clothes, spare clothes in a bag,you will need, 1 600ml coke bottles of petrol, gloves, a box of matches and a balaclava, go through the ph bill, chose the one she texts most, wait for him in the front bushes of his house, when he gets out the car upon arriving home, pretend his body is a piece of wood that needs a lot of nails banged in, no need for yelling or noise, your just doing your job remember, get the job done and run off, find a vacant spot you can strip your clothes off including the balaclava and gloves, the "red" gladwrap everything your wearing, pour the petrol over the whole lot and strike the match, burn that shit, run some more in the nude, stop, put new clothes, car is waiting in the next street over, put hammer in boot, drive home, bury hammer in back yard, go inside, new clothes in washing machine, you in shower, get out spark up celebration ciggie for hard days work.
good luck.
what do you say to a girl with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you already told her twice.
Sorry, Just watched Raging Bull for the hundreth time.
AnonIf he's from the US he might not know what glad wrap is. It's plastic for wrapping sandwiches. Sometimes you're so insensitive Flash...
bahahahaha lmao, sometimes late t night my humor is twisted, this was a joke, not so funny the next day pmsl.
?? how could you not know what Glad Wrap is... that's like not knowing what Kleenex is
hahahahah! its america not bloody pluto lol
Man after reading this it brought back memories of the OJ Simpson trial.
Lmao!
The only thing to do is sit her down and discuss all these things with her. Let her know how important it is to you. If her reaction is defensive or anything but constructive you have to decide if you want to be in the relationship anymore. If a married couple cannot have these types of conversations when one feels strongly about it, they shouldnt be together. Be better for you, her, and your daughter in the long run.
Give it an honest effort. Marriage is hard wor km sometimes, but it needs to be work for both of you.
Are you currently on tren?
X2...or any mind altering substance...good question
That's exactly what my first question is. Tren turns me into an ugly jealous little monster with little to no trust.
Tren is all lovey dovey until 8-9 weeks in and then it turns...
Either ester, or is ace sooner? I took one pellet back in 94 and it messed me up...
I personally felt it with long and short at nearly the same time out.
Thanks....its too crazy for me...i like the idea how it doesnt aromatize...but i still wont ever try it again. It caused me to.have a pain in my left arm and a tight ileo-tibia band in my right leg, along with a floating brick that smashed me in the face just about the time i was drifting off to sleep, which made me jump up out of bed....not fun
you gotta watch out for those floating bricks... they can really mess some shit up
That was 21 yrs ago and i remember it like it was yesterday. I had that brick spinning in all directions and every which way fast and slow....then i slowed it down....and BOOOOOM outta know where that thing was like a rocket ship towards me....i think i even looked in the mirror and checked for blood....lol
You sure you weren't using DMT?lol
Also gonna try that one of these days...
Lol...yea...it was a pellet that came out of a plastic cartridge. There were like 8 columns of 8 pellets, if i can remember correctly. I ordered them out of a farm and ranch magazine. The plastic was tough and hard to cut. The pellet was very hard to crush. After i found out i didnt like them, i boiled them...lol!! All the pellets turned into a stringy mess and ruined my teflon pot...lol!!
mikeyg4321Wtf lol interesting..
Yes yes yes...very crazy learning experiment back in my early 20s while in college...me and a another friend. He came across some deposterona too....it had like three low dose testosterones in it.....small 1cc vials that had pictures of animals on it like cows and sheep and horses...
She sounds like an emotional abuser and possibly bipolar. You guys need some counseling and you need to get your balls out of her purse. She's using the kid to try to make you feel inadequate as a father to make you feel like less of a man. Make sure she's not right and you're present in your child's life. That doesn't just mean being there. A relationship as well as being a parent is a partnership. 50/50. She can't be all wrong and probably has valid points, but even so...she shouldn't be verbally and emotionally abusing you brother. One day you could snap and all hell will break lose. You don't want that. Nip it in the bud and get to the root causes of everyone's frustration. When it's all out on the table and solutions instead of blaming happen and you hold yourselves accountable, you can move mountains together. Counseling. Work through this.
Where do you get bipolar from? did I miss something in the original post?
Bipolar disorder afflicted persons often place blame on others for things they are guilty of themselves. That's why I thought it to be a possibility. I didn't garner that from the original post, but from a comment down below.
thats called projection bi polar is a whole other BIG issue. Almost everyone projects stuff on to someone else when they are unable to take responsibility for their own actions however, reading down the post and being only a year out of pregnancy my guess is that her hormones are seriously out of whack and that my friend can make the sanest woman act like a raving lunatic.
"BiPolar" is the new money maker for the insurance compaines and big pharma... used to be "ADHD"
Remember the story in tx about the woman that drowned her five children in the bath tub? She was misdiagnosed by a MD and put on haldol. Bloods were ran after incident occurred and all thyroid hormones were out of balance. I spoke to her about 15 minutes close to a year before she committed this act. She presented to a hospital with a haldol overdose, along with positive mj on a SAP10/50. Over the course of the conversation her affect was flat and she was hateful. It was very sad becuz those kids suffered from what could have been fixed all with bloodwork.
yep .. fist thing I do is have hormone/thryroid checked out before ANYTHING else happens.
mikeyg4321Gosh grrl you are so smart!
OP is more than likely going to need some help convincing her to get BW done. Thats why i suggested he call the doc, personally, or get a trusted female friend, or family member, to convince her to get a check up. IMHO, what he is describing is all too real and deserves to be ruled out...ASAP
Oh, don't I know it. I've lived through it.
my deepest sympathy, I hope it was resolved well
The pp depression played itself out, but it led to a host of other issues which required us to seek counseling. Now, I don't want to kill her or cry myself to sleep and we get along just fine!
great ;-)
Maybe even post-partum depression and thyroid/parathyroid hormones are out of balance.
In contrast to or concert with bipolar disorder, yes, those are a possibility.
A relationship without trust is like a sports car without gas it looks great, but you can sit in it all you want and itll go no where. If its just dumbass shit than tell her how you feel......if its serious things something needs to change. You asked for opinions that's mine.
PallMallWhen I tell her how I feel it's like she tries to flip the script and point out how horrible I am to her. She never (rarely anyway) apologizes if I tell her something she did hurt me. Lately she's become super critical of everything I do as well. She'll get an attitude with me for smoking in the house then turn around and light a cigarette up... She ALWAYS tells me that the way I'm taking care of our one year old daughter wrong (and is insulting/belittling about it) even when the things I'm doing are perfectly fine and safe. I feel like she gets angry when I do stuff with the baby, almost like our daughter should hate me and nobody but her is able to even watch her. But then she'll turn around and give her to me to babysit for 5 hours while she takes a nap, only to treat me like I neglected my daughter during the time I spent with her.
Do you know what I would do? I would personally sit down one day and put all the cards on the table. Tell her, be like things have been out of the norm in many ways as you know. No need to go into detail , your both there all the time, you both notice what's wrong and what the differences are. So ask here if she wants to help you and help your relationship get better and what it used to be or does she want to seperate plain and simple. Put all the cards on the table. But, you have to be willing to put 100% in and so doesn't she, it will take commitment and dedication some days will be tough. You have to establish that if its what you both want. Make it clear those are the two choices and you want it to get better or not stay together miserable until the powder keg blows and things get worse. That's what I would do. No need to guess and wonder and assume things. Fucking talk and figure it out. Get shit right or get on your way plain and simple.
Another opinion take it or leave it. Don't smoke in your fucking house with a child. I smoked for a long time but I never smoked in my homes nor did I ever smoke around my son. Second hand smoke kills. It also makes everything stink including your child's things.
I was this way with my baby boy, but i didnt insult, or belittle, his mom. I was supercritical because i didnt feel like her capabilities of taking care of him were up to par. Soumds like she could benefit from a support group, a workout regimen, and/or a checkup with MD. You are gonna have to be a positive role model and understand her frustration. Are both yall working 40 hour work weeks?
so what did you do to remedy the issue....? and how can you be super critical yet not insult or belittle someone while being super critical or did you keep it to yourself?
No trust= No contentment.
Simple as that.
PallMallI hear you. We used to be really happy together, but now days its like we just share the same space and exist near each other. I try and talk to her about it and she gets angry so the conversations just end up going nowhere. She likes to say, " So it's all my fault and I'm just horrible and you're perfect." Well, words to that extent anyway, stuff that's loud and sarcastic/aggressive anyway. I try and be really caring, do things for her all the time, dote on her wants/needs like a butler, try to make her laugh or smile...it just never seems to work. It's possible I'm imagining myself in a better light than the case be in reality, but I still feel in a large part of the circumstances she just doesn't care.
Well, it sounds like u are recognizing her emotional needs. However, 1 year post pregnancy could be the culprit. I believe women need bloodwork after pregnancy to evaluate their thyroid hormones. I believe there are 5 hormones that need particular attention paid to them. Some women can stabilize, and some cant. U cant suggest this to her becuz i mentioned it on here....she would flip out and say u are sharing yalls private info to strangers!! So, maybe u can talk to her doctor, or a trusted female friend, that can help u convince her to get a post-partum check up with bloodwork. Its a suggestion, and not a shot in the dark. I wanna believe she is not cheating, or using, first, and give her the benefit of the doubt.
I lie to my wife orf 22 years on a semi regular basis.
"Who ate all the ice cream?"
"I don't know"
...So I don't see the problem.