ageisanumber's picture
ageisanumber
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Wife Absolutely Struggles with Weight Loss and I Cannot See Her Cry Another Day

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Let me give you a little background. My wife and I are both executives for large corporations and I like to think well planned and thought out individuals. We also own our own gym, a sports arena and have an internal personal trainer school. I have coached athletes, body builders, transformation winners and just people wanting quality of life. I have approached my wife just like any of the aforementioned individuals and she is struggling. Let me mention this woman works hard in the gym and at life. She won a transformation comp in 2016 but had a benign branchial cleft cyst a few years back. Now Thyroid issues are very rate with this cyst and doctor did not believe it would be an issue.

She has an amazing propensity to pack on muscle. I am often jealous of her huge muscle bellies and traps. It BS! Smile . However the same ability to pack on muscle within a deficit has also shifted to an inability to shed weight and BF and frankly has been adding pounds. Slowly but for a woman that works her A$$ off this is very demotivating and frustrating.

I have tried worked ever MACRO game in the book. Ever diet from intermittent to keto over the last couple years and this woman is at her wits end.

I should mention that her SEX DRIVE has been really, really low for the last few years. So I believe we might have a couple scenarios here but wanted to poll this group because I trust the guidance of so many people on this sight. I do not comment or post a lot but am a frequent digestor of the great content.

Question:
1. Should we start with sending her to get her bloodwork done?
2. If yes what tests should she be looking for to cover all the possibilities from Thyroid to low test, etc?
3. What kind of doctor is the best to give us the best guidance and protocols moving forward?

Thank you all in advance for taking the time to read my lengthy post. My wife is my world and when she cries I lose my sh!+ .

Eagles 2013's picture

I know this post is a year old but my wife is 36 years old with no prior medical or mental illness and suffering from the same symptoms.

She was never what I would consider a gym rat, but "dabbled in the local Planet Fitness" as I like to put ir before we met and started dating.

After we became serious she joined my gym where you can grunt, drink from whatever sized container you like and sweat without an alarm going off.

She was in there with me 4-5 days a week lifting, doing fasted AM cardio straight out of bed in the morning and I taught her how to meal prep, track macros, use a TDEE calculator to make a plan in advance to reach your goals in a targeted time frame, the importance of meal timing etc, explained in a way that someone who was never serious into fitness that you have to eat to burn fat or build muscle and its all about the what, when and how much you ate, etc. Essentially I showed her the ropes, she stuck with it and totally transformed her body and I have never seen her so confident and happy in all the years that I have known her. It is also important to mention that before we met, before she started dating me, before she asked me to coach her... Basically her whole life her libido has been through the roof.

About 2.5 years ago her libido completely crashed and her OBGYN was in my opinion a quack because my wife visited her multiple times over the course of a year and a half complaining of her diminishing libido. All this OBGYN did was remove her IUD (doc's idea, my wife didn't request it) and recommended lifestyle changes like dont take baths, don't shave your genital area, don't use scented wipes or soap etc.

The whole time I was begging my now wife to insist that the doc run a full hormone panel, go see another doctor and if she wouldn't I would personally pay out of pocket for her to go to the local lab corp and have a full female hormone panel run just to see the results because to me everything screamed hormonal imbalance.

Fast forward to last February and I finally convinced her to go see a very highly recommended OBGYN as she was seeing no improvement on the treatment plan the original OBGYN had her on and was beginning to suffer extreme pain any time she attempted any form of intercourse (any form meaning toys, fingers or myself in the traditional sense) and her new OBGYN recommend her to a specialist who immediately diagnosed her with vulvar vestibulitis and repaired it surgically.

Once she had recovered from the surgery all of the pain and irritation associated with the vulvar vestibulitis had gone away and she had made a full recovery in that regard but still had zero sex drive so the new doc ran a full hormone panel. Everything came back in range except her testosterone, which came back with a score of 2 ng/dl and we are still waiting on the thyroid results.

He said that her testosterone wad pretty low but still inside the normal range. However, I have seen a lot of conflicting information suggesting that below 15 ng/dl for a 36 year old female is low.

I'm not an OBGYN and I'm not going to try to be and guest, but you can't get much lower than 2.

She explained all of this to her GP who simply put her on Wellbutrin because she was becoming depressed that she has no desire for any type of sexual activity and is well aware of my AAS use and my high sex drive before I began using AAS, which only makes her feel worse.

I'm sorry for the long post and I promise that I am not some creep posting about sex in the group titled "Ladies Lounge".

I was just curious if any female members suffered from low T, if it impacted your libo and treatment improved it or any other advice other members who may have experienced first hand something similar and the treatment routes they took as well as outcomes.

I am very knowledgeable about AAS use and the effects of hormal imbalances in men but I am clueless as to how those topics relate to females.

VERY IMPORTANT TO NOTE THAT SHE HAS NEVER USED ANY FORM OF AAS, NOT EVEN A VERY SMALL VAR OR WINNY CYCLE.

I just wanted to make sure that it stood out that there is no way this is the result of AAS use.

Anyway, thank you all for reading and input you may have. I am utilizing every resource I have access to help the love of my life out of one of the toughest times of hers, and I have heard that low T in a female can have a very negative impact on libido just like it can in a male which is why I came here.

Again, thank you to all who took the time to read, and extra big thank you to anyone who comments or sends me an FR to offer advice or discus a similar situation in a private setting and a big thank you to the entire Eroids community for coming together and forming such a huge asset for the entire world.

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ladykiller's picture

Hey man, I saw this post that you made about your wife struggling to lose weight. I know it was a year ago you posted it so it’s been awhile! I just wnated to know if you figured out the issue, if not I’d be happy to try and help

wanted's picture

Thyroid can really mess with the body
Just be strong support My mom was always great shape
Then she started battling with thyroid and medication,

Laceymum10's picture

I'm no expert on the bloodwork or doctors but ii took clenbuterol before and lost over 3 stone I'm no expert but it's maybe something to look into

ageisanumber's picture

Thank you I everyone for the time. Gathering the facts right now from the post putting them in an email to the wifey explain what each of the acronyms are with the highest rated Endocrinologists contact information here in my area.

Pxpxp's picture

You might know a lot about nutrition and being a PT. But if her hormones are off, you swimming upstream .. get her into a very good clinic. One with knowledgeable docs

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DbolAndAll's picture

get a hormone panel done and all that. Have you tried figuring out her total daily expenditure of calories and does she keep track of how many calories she's consuming. I had a hard time losing weight and blamed thyroid for it, but my t3 and t4 was better than 90% of the population (i was perfectly fine) the only was to lose weight is to burn more than you consume

so she needs to start tracking what she eats. start with my fitness pal, its not 100% accurate but its a whole lot better than guessing, track her steps and increase the amount done or decrease calories if she doesn't notice the scale move.

if she sees sudden weight loss and it suddenly slows down then dont worry thats just water weight and less food in the gut to hold. fat loss takes time and it cant be done instantaneously

ageisanumber's picture

Thank you. If you read the entire post you would have seen that we do all that and more. I Amna licensed nutritionist and personal trainer. We are getting macros, my fitness pal and those things. That we have been doing for 7 years straights.

Sam I Am's picture

I’d definitely have bloods ran.
Low carb diets work great..

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ageisanumber's picture

Believe it or not keto is even talking a bit flat right now. Bloodworm it is. Just didn't know if she needed to go full endocrinologist, but it looks like that is where we need to start. Thank you.

Halsey's picture

An open minded endocrinologist.

full thyroid panel; t3, t4, tsh, reverse t3 , tpos (check for hashimoto's). Get the whole damn thing. I'm sure I left some out.

full female hormone panel. Research it

Probably cmp CBC too.

That's where I would start

Zalewski's picture

Also her A1C, I doubt she has issues with blood sugar but at least check it incase something might be wrong with her insulin sensitivity

ageisanumber's picture

Thank you

Halsey's picture

Menapause and thyroid issues are rough on women. My wife has hashimoto's and is perimenopause. Her hormones were out of whack too.

Diabetes I would have thought would have been caught by now. But a1c is always a must.

cbp125's picture

I am a bit of a newbie here, but just thought I'd question if she is on any medication that could be causing this problem. Quite a few contraceptives have this effect. I understand her pain after going from being very skinny and fit for all my life to being severely obese due to drugs my doctor gave me. Its so cruel when you know you are doing everything right and still getting bigger and bigger. I've just fixed myself (with help from this site) but it's just so cruel.
On a different angle has she been tested for food allergies? They can suddenly start in people who never had them before and can cause bloating/swelling etc?
Good luck

ageisanumber's picture

She is not on any medication and otherwise a very healthy individual. We are fit people count calories daily and do not drink a terrible amount at all. She has no allergies and in all other aspects of her life she is a GD superhero. Thank you for your reply

miggymig's picture

If she had a cyst even in the past you need to turn to her Dr. She will have to relay your concerns and they will know best where to start. As I know some of the members here are medical professionals and some have enough studies and knowledge to help it would be best to take them to her Dr at this time