Jrihard89's picture
Jrihard89
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+ 28 105 day transformation so far

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This is going to be a lot for me to talk about, and I feel disgusted even posting this…. So bear with me.

I went 10 years between my last bodybuilding show and the 2nd photo. I thought I was doing the right thing. Being a father, husband and business owner. Focusing on everything except my health, physically and mentally.

The guy on the left, sat up every night contemplating suicide. Since 2024 I was planning how I can take my life and make sure the family is set up. I planned it, even my good friend who helps manage our investments caught on and sat me down at lunch mid 2025 and asked what’s going on but I lied to him.

I gained 60-70 pounds from Jan 2025 to Feb 2026. Between that time I got worst with my depression and suicidal thoughts I had multiple knee surgeries which caused me to limp, miss out on things I love like hiking, and I felt like I was a failure of a husband and father. I kept my distance from my wife think she’s disgusted with me.

Feb 2026 after praying about it, I went to the garage and cried, my wife came in to talk to me at 2am and found I had loaded one of my handguns and was feeling ready. It was a rough night. To say the least. I decided to not give up and my wife begged me to focus on myself. I always have put my kiddos and her above myself..

105 days later, exactly 15 weeks from the day I joined the gym back up. Feb 22nd. I am down 47lbs. Per a dexa scan at the local university Friday. It’s 42.8lbs of fat and up 8lbs of muscle tissue in 105 days. I have a long way to go.. don’t get me wrong.

But mentally I am feeling better than ever. I am more mobile after a successful 4th surgery, I feel more confident, stronger mentally and physically. I fell in love with the gym again..

I made this to say it does get better if you’re going through it, I really didn’t want to post this.. but I feel like God has called me to testify. To be there for anyone who is going through it themselves. My DMs are open.

It helps knowing dieting, training and such from back in he day competing. But the work I’ve put in, I’m finally feeling proud of myself..

Love yall.

Edit: ignore the big ass clunky shirt in the first photo, I finally felt comfortable enough to not wear a sweatshirt in the gym again.

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Lintlicker123's picture

You’re looking good brother. Keep up the good work, you’re already looking a hell of a lot better and there’s much more to come. Don’t let the hard days win!!! Keep reminding yourself you’re a bad mfer and there’s not shit out there that will stop you. I don’t know you and you don’t know me, but I am here for anybody that wants to talk with zero shame. Reach out to me if you ever need/ want to just talk. I will tell you the same thing I tell my friends, this conversation is between me and you, it will never leave us.” That doesn’t have to be said here because we’re both strangers. But reach out if you just want to talk. Keep pushing brother, you got this!!!!

Okfergein's picture

Good job brother, keep going!

Roastbeast86's picture

Lets go brother.

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HogCranker3000's picture

I really respect that you posted this brother.
Us men need to feel like we can reach out and talk to someone, we've been conditioned our whole lives not to speak up. We can defeat that stigma, we can make our sons ok with talking about their emotions with friends and loved ones. Reach out and call that friend who isnt doing well, lovingly light a fire in their bellies and build up your fellow brothers. I hope the best for you man, huge transformation in 105 days. You look like you could rip a phonebook in half!

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Pandateston's picture

Brooo, I told you this before…

The physique transformation is impressive, but the mental transformation is what really matters here.

You already built a great physique once. You’re not starting from zero … you’re coming back to something you’ve already achieved before. In many ways, getting it back is easier than building it the first time.

The real victory is beating those demons and choosing to keep fighting.

Keep stacking those small wins every day. You’re proving to yourself and everyone around you that it was worth it.

Much respect, Big bro !

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Azaghal's picture

You're a brave person, not everyone is prepared to be so honest.
Respect.

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-Infidel-'s picture

Thanks for sharing my man, I'm sure that was hard to say out loud. This sounds cheesy and cliche, but identifying the problem is the first step, and you went past that.

As for your current pic... I wouldn't want to meet a pissed off version of you in a back alley, you are a beast.. keep up the work bro

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randomdude's picture

That’s some tough stuff to say aloud. Kudos.

Keep on keepin on. Life’s a garden. Dig it.

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ThundaWunda's picture

Thanks for the testimony bro. I was in a similar boat a little over a year ago with alcohol and life. God has a path for all of us even sometimes we walk off the path he brings us back in. Stay the course.

OscarWildwood's picture

Your life matters and it sounds like you have a great partner supporting you. We often forget everyone is going through something behind closed doors. Sometimes being in the gym is the best medicine for us mentally as well as physically. I’m glad you’re still here with us and have a renewed focus on improving for yourself and your family. Keep up the great progress brother!

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Milfpounder's picture

Fuck man. We're always just talking shit on here for fun, but always escapes me that ppl are going thru real shit in their lives and hiding it from view. Glad you're pulling thru butthole.

Also, you got some fuckin pythons on you.

Great job on the weight loss you dirty little whore slut

JohnnyHardGuy's picture

Thank you so much for posting this.
I know it is not easy to share your intimate battle with mental health, however it is this type of candor that will eventually break the cycle for so many of our brothers and sisters who are suffering in silence.
You have quite the wife sir as well as have so many things going for you. I am so happy you decided to give yourself and life another shot.
God will never put you in a situation that you cannot handle.
If anyone is suffering, please just say something to someone. People do care. You are irreplaceable.
Thank you again for posting and much good luck to you & your family as you continue the journey.

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Jockstrap's picture

Big assed arms!!! Booyah! Keep focused bro

Foreal4's picture

Good job brother

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shredski's picture

Life can really throw it at us man, we suit up and show up or throw in the towel, glad you took life by the horns. I’ve been there too man suicidal ideation is no joke it’s a scary place to be. Glad your here

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bamboo2112's picture

All the hard work will be worth it. Good Job

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CRACKLIND's picture

Great work brother

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Codeman253's picture

Bro that's not even half a year, you're fucking killing it. I think another 6-8 months of staying locked in you have a shot of hitting sub 15 %

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KingRoni88's picture

You got this brother. IF YOU ever need somebody to vent to friend me, we can talk. Stay in God, stay strong and stay involved with your family. You got this!

TheIcon's picture

I always say and it usually sounds wrong but you always have to put yourself first. Cause if you aren't right then you can't be 100% for your wife and kids. If I am not good and I try to play it off my kids know it. They see it. They aren't dumb. May not know exactly what but they can tell dad is half there. So while I may be at every sport event I am only half engaged. I want to be fully engaged and to do that you gotta focus on yourself.

Tanman's picture

Keep at it brother! Coming from someone who was in a VERY similar place in 2024, I can say with complete confidence that it only gets better

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Mrtommorrow1987's picture

Keep going brother you killing it.

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SeeOhShow's picture

One day at a time. No amount of money left behind replaces your actual presence with your family. Glad you pulled through and found more purpose again

press1's picture

Well Done Buddy for holding yourself accountable - it's Great to hear you are on the up and happy again. Its not the easiest of things to admit where you went wrong in life, but its something you have to do and face in order to progress and leave the past life behind you. The mind is a much stronger tool than the body that ultimately determines everything that you achieve - & You can achieve anything you want to if you want it bad enough Good Smile Also a MASSIVE improvement there - looks like a totally different person in the 2 shots