Hello.
As the title suggests this is a post of what I consider to be the stupidst cycle you could do as a first cycle.
I'm posting it for the following reasons:
- I want people to look at it agree on how dumb it is.
- I want people to never do what I did
- I want the post to serve as a reference for red flags so that you can avoid going down the same slippery slope

Few little tidbits to note:
Mental state and decision making heavily impaired from day 1.
I had all the research and tools I needed to not mess this up, but literally consistently chose the opposite compound (method of action wise) from what I needed to mitigate side effects.
I didn't even notice the most important change that occured: I was becoming a very different person.
I made terrible life decisions, didn't do my research properly, ordered whatever I wanted tried everything under the sun ancilliary wise to fix it later on.
I spent shit loads on OTC supplements of all kinds to keep bloods in range.

The only thing I did right was get lots of blood testing done.
I've left some values for you to see in the chart. Had more since.

Quick rundown of some points of interest not in the chart:
HDL and LDL were both low on cycle.
Everything else was fine (inlcuding liver.)
Kidney markers slightly elevated but just below the top of the ref range
T3 came back legitimately low at one point.

Side effects wise, I just had high BP all the time and couldn't think straight.

I felt at my best at the start of the cycle. (first 4 weeks.)

If I had just stuck to 300mg test e twice a week with HCG and some Arimidex I would've been fine.
But all the other shit I ran had me chasing demons in the night wondering what was the root cause of the problems.
I was trying to fix issues that didn't exist.
Thought I was getting gyno - I wasn't at all I just had some water retention.
In hinesight it was obviously estrogen related.

And taking proviron so early totally destroyed any hope I had of being able to regulate the androgens in my system with SHBG crushed.

As far as results.
I did put on 10kg+ lean tissue.
I was one of these idiots with stupid levels of body dismorphia that just couldn't comprehend how lean I was.
I started the cycle at 10%BF. By week 8 I was 7% easily (literally striations everywhere very lean).
In my head I thought I was 12% at week 8. It was because I piled on water retention and bloating as the day went on. So I deluded myself into thinking I wasn't lean.
I was 10kg heavier 5 weeks after starting and leaner.

Test was obviously not bunk.
Proviron was obviously not bunk.
Clen definitely real. I think it was overdosed pills or I reacted terribly to it.
I think my anavar and winstrol was probably underdosed.
I think the SARMS were potentially bunk.
The MK677 was real I literally exploded with water every time I took it.
Arimidex I assume was real but we'll never know.
T3 was definitely legit I was igniting like a furnace 24/7 on that shit.
What else, the GW was real I was a cardio monster absolutely loved that stuff.
Also I from memory I think that one probably caused my lipids to tank.

Strength wise I did feel very strong when I started the anavar. Performed my best lifts early on when I started that.

Anyway I stopped everything in the end no PCT complete cold turkey just to put the icing on the cake.
Needless to say I felt like complete dogshit. Still had the high BP even after stopping eveything.
Lost all the gains.

If I were to do it all over again I'd just do the 300 test e a week.
Take the armidex when needed and no more, don't touch proviron.
HCG was fine that stuff was great.
I'd just run the 20mg Anavar on top and some GW.
Get lots of strength, I do really enjoy cardio and GW took the edge off from the energy crash you sometimes get from doing 1 hours of moderate cardio.
Wouldn't bother with anything else really.

At least from this I learned the hard, fast, dumb and side-effect fueled way what does and doesn't work for me.
If I wanna get lean T3 and GW does the job.
If I want strength a touch of Var.
Stick with the easiest one: Test is best.
HCG for the extra horny and ball-preserving.

Feel free to state thy opinions below.

BLOOD PRESSURE DATE Time
125/59 29/03/2023 09:00
159/65 14/04/2023 10:00
125/60 14/04/2023 12:20
154/69 14/04/2023 12:30
170/60 15/04/2023 17:00
156/75 15/04/2023 17:40
159/61 15/04/2023 18:39
163/63 16/04/2023 22:44
134/60 17/04/2023 11:54
131/65 17/04/2023 16:33
130/53 18/04/2023 21:26

DATE TIME SYS DIA PUL
16/08/2023 12:50 159 64 85
16/08/2023 12:54 155 68 88
16/08/2023 20:26 147 72 94
16/08/2023 20:29 160 74 89
17/08/2023 20:36 173 70 76
17/08/2023 20:39 157 72 74
18/08/2023 09:02 156 70 86
18/08/2023 09:05 155 68 83
21/08/2023 09:05 168 62 71
21/08/2023 09:08 158 66 72
21/08/2023 19:17 159 58 79
21/08/2023 19:19 157 55 77